Nice People Thread Number 11 - A Treasury of Nice People

LydiaJ

lostinrates wrote: »

I have never discussed class so much as in the NPT. Anywhere!

Neither have I. I think it gets talked about here because
(a) This is a place where we get to hang out with interesting people from backgrounds that are different from our own.
(b) This is a place of idle and trivial conversation, often in response to trivial newspaper articles.
(c) The "posh alert" ongoing thing introduces the topic. Blame PN for that.

lostinrates wrote: »

My sibling said several times I could have done so much 'better'. ( which makes me see red and behave VERY badly)

I'm not surprised. That sort of comment about a partner that somebody has already committed to, whether based on class or wealth or education or anything else, is always inexcusable.

lostinrates wrote: »

It has NEVER mattered to me what the job, colour, class or various other things of the person I settled down with.

No, nor me. LNE was certainly nowhere near as U as my family, and it never crossed my mind that it would matter. My criteria for a new bloke do include "able to have an interesting and intelligent conversation with me" and "not intimidated by my academic qualifications" but that's as far as it goes. One of the things I appreciated about LNE was that failing his own first degree didn't make any difference to his pride and delight in my doctorate.

lostinrates wrote: »

Admittedly I remain somewhat surprised its DH, and overwhelmed at my luck and sense to recognise it was DH, ip and his silliness to stick with me.

I think that's quite common in really good marriages. I know my dad still feels surprised that such an amazing person as my mum said yes - and she said yes in 1955!

Nikkster

LydiaJ wrote: »

I think that's quite common in really good marriages. I know my dad still feels surprised that such an amazing person as my mum said yes - and she said yes in 1955!

I guess that's the way it should be? That you start off being amazed that they are interested in you, and that they remain interesting and attractive etc to you so you remain amazed. Sounds good to me (sat here on my own :rotfl:)

lostinrates

Nikkster wrote: »

I ticked 'yes' to guest linen.

I have 3 sets that are I've had for years which are definitely 'mine', my parents brought over some spare bedding which was bought when my brother was at Uni which is used on the spare double. I have some single bedding which I bought when I was in halls which is used on my spare single. The double which is still in the dining room is going to go on freecycle when I get round to it so it doesn't have it's own set of bedding.

I'm not sure any of it particularly increases my social standing (although the stuff that I bought was from pre-Homebase Habitat and House of Fraser if that helps, my brothers stuff will have come from Tesco).

Edit: In fact I'm sure it probably decreases my social standing seeing as some of it was student linen!

I've been chucking out some of student linen in recent years. Still some lurking. Dogs have some.

I really can feel the difference in bed.

Our quilt, a handmedown and sotobec one I remember being bought when I was at school, is going to have go this year, Its really disreputable. I quite fancy a silk duvet but they look kind of mean which puts me off a bit.

lostinrates

Nikkster wrote: »

I guess that's the way it should be? That you start off being amazed that they are interested in you, and that they remain interesting and attractive etc to you so you remain amazed. Sounds good to me (sat here on my own :rotfl:)

Actually, I wasn't amazed he was into me. I was a bit ..not interested in him.:rotfl:

PasturesNew

LydiaJ wrote: »

(c) The "posh alert" ongoing thing introduces the topic. Blame PN for that.

If people weren't doing/having posh things... there'd be no need for an alert... don't shoot the messenger :P

Nikkster

lostinrates wrote: »

I've been chucking out some of student linen in recent years. Still some lurking. Dogs have some.

I really can feel the difference in bed.

Our quilt, a handmedown and sotobec one I remember being bought when I was at school, is going to have go this year, Its really disreputable. I quite fancy a silk duvet but they look kind of mean which puts me off a bit.

I'll replace the bed linen (not to mention the beds, pillows and duvets) as and when I see things I like/ have decided on colour schemes etc.

Until then, if people don't like the facilities they are welcome not to stay over (no-one has complained so far, maybe that's because they're usually drinking plenty of wine though). Or they can borrow my tent and sleeping bag and pitch up in the garden

lostinrates wrote: »

Actually, I wasn't amazed he was into me. I was a bit ..not interested in him.:rotfl:

I think you've mentioned that before. It's all worked out well for you two though.

I'm definitely not going for someone who my initial thought is 'not really interested, but what's the worst that can happen?' again. Doesn't seem to go that well for me!

lostinrates

Nikkster wrote: »

I think you've mentioned that before. It's all worked out well for you two though.

I'm definitely not going for someone who my initial thought is 'not really interested, but what's the worst that can happen?' again. Doesn't seem to go that well for me!

I don't think its wise to proceed with someone you're not into. He convinced me otherwise very quickly. I would not have lead him on. I do think its worth getting to know someone who is nice, even just to make another friend. I wouldn't pursue anything friendship wise with anyone who made me in anyway uncomfortable

I wonder, for example, how many NP would have been friends from....meeting on a train or something? Given time to chat we've become very find of each other in many cases.

PasturesNew

Nikkster wrote: »

Until then, if people don't like the facilities they are welcome not to stay over

I feel lucky when I've got a sofa to curl up on with my own sleeping bag

lostinrates

PasturesNew wrote: »

I feel lucky when I've got a sofa to curl up on with my own sleeping bag

I slept on a remote control last night..:o I think what you choose at your own home and what you are grateful for as a guest are often different.

I don't choose to buy ikea sheets any more ( though they do seem to be indestructible) but if I slept on them at someone else's house I would be grateful for the hospitality.

The two things are different.

Nikkster

lostinrates wrote: »

I don't think its wise to proceed with someone you're not into. He convinced me otherwise very quickly. I would not have lead him on. I do think its worth getting to know someone who is nice, even just to make another friend. I wouldn't pursue anything friendship wise with anyone who made me in anyway uncomfortable

I wonder, for example, how many NP would have been friends from....meeting on a train or something? Given time to chat we've become very find of each other in many cases.

I guess for many (most?) of us, the chances that we would have met in RL are fairly slim (although there are connections). I guess if we'd realised that we were all 'friends of Martin' we might have found something to break the ice? Not that money saving is the majority of what we chat about.

I think it just takes me a while to get to know people properly. All my (3) relationships have started off with me being the less interested party. The last two ended up with them definitely showing that they were less interested in being part of a relationship with me.

It's ok, I'm safe at the moment. No one is interested :rotfl: