Do people still go on 'dates'?

paulineb_2

Mirno wrote: »

Men: If you spend more time than usual (and lets face it in most of our cases it's zero minutes) picking out the clothes you wear before heading out to meet her - then it's a date.

Clearly the same test can't be applied to women - they spend incalculable numbers of hours thinking about just shoes let alone the rest of their outfit.

Apart from a shower, I can take about 10 mins to get ready to go out on a night out. Dont tend to spend much longer than that. Not every woman takes hours to get ready on a night out.

paulineb_2

To be honest, people can call dating what they like. Id never really say that I would go on dates with a bf, Id just be seeing them. I know people have date nights, but its not what I would call dating.

I think different countries do things in different ways, in the USA, its normal to date a few people at a time before being exclusive with one person and with a lot of people online dating as well, you might get more people in the UK doing that as well.

As I said before, when Ive started seeing someone Ive known quite quickly that we were in a relationship, weve made the decision or its just naturally gone like that, that we werent seeing anyone else.

If people want to call nights out with a partner dates, nothing wrong with that, but its not what Id personally call it. Id just be seeing them as I normally would. I suppose a lot would depend how often you went out and how often you stayed in as well and whether its difficult for couples to get out quite often, if you dont go out that much you might want to make effort and call it a date night.

InsideInsurance

paulineb wrote: »

If people want to call nights out with a partner dates, nothing wrong with that, but its not what Id personally call it.

So what would you define as a date?

Dictionary is simply:

a social or romantic appointment or engagement

Personally, its preplanned time (even if its just minutes before) which you'll spend doing something together in a social or romantic way. Doesnt have to be going out, could be a meal together at home.

It doesnt have to be exclusive, it doesnt technically even have to be of romantic interest.

paulineb_2

InsideInsurance wrote: »

So what would you define as a date?

Dictionary is simply:

Personally, its preplanned time (even if its just minutes before) which you'll spend doing something together in a social or romantic way. Doesnt have to be going out, could be a meal together at home.

It doesnt have to be exclusive, it doesnt technically even have to be of romantic interest.

I dont think its about me defining it, its just not language Id use if I was going out with someone Id been seeing for a while or even meeting a friend or relative. Id just say I was seeing someone, going out with them, or meeting them.

I also don't know many people I know who would use the word date for seeing a partner or friend, that might be just the way people refer to things in certain geographical areas or just the way they refer to meeting up with someone, a personal choice of word or phrase.

Buzzybee90

To me dating is something you do before you're in a relationship. I did go on a couple of secret "dates" to parks and on walks & drives with my boyfriend but nothing more than that until we were "official".

Georgiegirl256

paulineb wrote: »

I dont think its about me defining it, its just not language Id use if I was going out with someone Id been seeing for a while or even meeting a friend or relative. Id just say I was seeing someone, going out with them, or meeting them.

I also don't know many people I know who would use the word date for seeing a partner or friend,

I wouldn't call seeing a partner/spouse a date either, I'd call it a night out.

Lunar_Eclipse

Yes! DH & I still aim to have a weekly date night after 20+ years of living together/marriage.

Romance is alive and well, and is different to casual sex (but not mutually exclusive I know!) This makes me think of the old 'girlfriend vs wife' comments.

Lunar_Eclipse

Mirno wrote: »

Clearly the same test can't be applied to women - they spend incalculable numbers of hours thinking about just shoes let alone the rest of their outfit.

Ha! I can be washed, changed and out the door in under 10 minutes, thanks to the natural knock on effects of having children (& little free time.) Prior to that I didn't spend hours thinking about shoes, but did sometimes enjoy a long bath and leisurely getting ready process which could have taken an hour or so when I was a late teenager or going to a special, black tie event. Nowadays I am incredibly time efficient and quicker than the hubster.

*max*

To me a date is something you do when you're getting to know a potential partner, prior to being in a full-blown relationship. I think OP was asking about dating in that sense.

I wouldn't call going out for a meal or whatever else with a husband/partner a date FWIW.

moneyistooshorttomention

I'm in an agegroup where I'm nearly old enough to have a son your age (in early childbearing circles that would make me older than your mother then I guess...LOL). I was dating until quite recently. I certainly expected to go on "dates". I expected the man to ask me out and we would go on a "date" (more likely arranging to meet for a few drinks in a pub as a first date, rather than a meal out:(). I occasionally was the one to do the asking on a first date (ie if the man didn't seem to have clicked I was interested in him).

Definitely there would be a first date, to see if it was worth pursuing any further (decision on my part often being that it wasn't) and then a few more "dates" whilst we both decided whether to turn it into a relationship.