Death in house

Southernlass

I've just found out that in the house we are buying, the vendor's partner died (suffering from cancer) in the house itself. I'd thought she'd died in hospital but turns out she died at home. Obviously it was very sad as she left behind her partner and 2 children.

It's not going to change us buying the house but I don't know how I feel about it - she probably died in the bedroom that will be our main bedroom. Whilst I've lived in old properties before and always known that they must have had years of history and people born, living and dying in them, this is obviously a lot more recent - only 2 years ago.

Interested in other people's thoughts - would it make you feel strange or not bother you at all.

System

My Nan died in my living room. My Uncle died in the room I am in now. Granted they are family members but I didn't know them. It doesn't bother me.


Death doesn't bother me.

ariba10

If you feel like that don't even contemplate going into hospital.

princeofpounds

Frankly, anyone who is half-sensible knows that it doesn't really matter.

Most houses that have any history to them have probably had someone die in them.

And it's something that happens to all of us in the end.

If you remember that person was a real person like all the rest of us, with family, dreams, hobbies, quirks and whatever else there is that makes us human, rather than a !!!!!ish cadaver, then it put a different spin on things.

Unless the house was built on an old indian burial ground of course. Then I'd run a mile.

[Edit: how weird. gh 0 u 1 is a banned word on the forum it seems.]

theartfullodger

We all die some day:

If you wish to live in a world with no connection to death you may be disappointed... but your life, your decision, your money...

How do you think Lizzie Windsor feels in Windsor castle?? Goes back to the 11th century: Even had squatters at one time... probably a few killed on the premises also... and loads of people, some kings & queens, buried there..

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Windsor_Castle

comeandgo

Would make absolutely no difference. My sister got a house cheap as the prior owner hung himself from the rafters and it did put people off buying it but not her.

swingaloo

Myself and my partner went to view a house with the estate agent. The house was beautiful with a gorgeous hallway and stairs facing you as you walked through the front door.

Everything was perfect, I thought I had found my dream home but just as we were leaving the current owner arrived home. I recognised the lady as one of my old neighbours. I knew she had moved to the road we were viewing the house on but didn't know it was the house we had viewed until she turned up.

I also knew that four years before she had come home with her 2 young children and opened the front door to find her husband hanging from the stairs.

I couldn't buy the house, I would have seen him every time I walked in or imagined him every time I crossed the landing to go to the loo.

However, in your case its very different, every house has had births and deaths and perhaps if you look at it another way- the person may have had a lovely family life there and wanted to spend her last hours in a happy home.

Make it a home full of your family memories, don't be put off.

Miss_Marple_2

Having nursed my mum through cancer, and been glad I was with her at the end, and then lived in her house for a time after she died, I know I have no problem with living where someone died of natural causes. I assume that most houses have had a death in them at some point ( unless house is relatively new)


I must admit, if there had been a massacre in the house, I would be a little bit unsure.


A couple round the corner from me got very upset with the neighbours that they thought had deceived them by not telling them that the previous owner had committed suicide there. I couldn't really see why it bothered them and why they thought people should have told them. They moved after 6 months

Sandhy

I found out something similar from a neighbour about the house I lived in a few years ago. The wife died from cancer. She has been in hospital and wanted to die at home. It was the house they had lived in for most of their married life and brought up their kids. Two children were also born at home. For the last few weeks of her life she was in a bed in the living room looked after by her devoted husband and family calling in every day. It was the way she and her family wanted.
I felt a mixture of sadness and happiness that it had been a family home with all their family memories.

Southernlass

Thanks for all of the comments. Like I said, I hadn't thought through whether it bothered me or not - so useful to just mull it over and hear other peoples thoughts.

I'm not squeamish about the thought of a body...and recognise that people die all the time (particularly in hospitals!). Having lived in a house 200 years old before, I think it was more unlikely that someone HADN'T died in any of the rooms.

I think it was more the personalised nature of it - having met the family and that it was so recent. I agree that it would be far more unsettling if there had been a murder or a suicide. I guess I just felt sad - she was obviously very loved. This will pass and I'm sure I'll love living there.

I know people either do or don't believe in ghosts but after we sold our last house, the purchasers have said there's being really strange goings on in one room in the house - like coming back after making a cup of tea and the tv had been turned to face the wall and something poked one of them in bed during the night...we never had any problems but maybe the ghosties liked us!

KatieDee

You know...I've never really thought about this before! I find it very difficult to cope with death (although I am aware it comes to us all) but I don't think knowing somebody had died in the property would give me the heebie-jeebies! I guess it would depend on whether I knew of them previously...you've met the family which does make things a little bit more personal.

I hope nothing creepy happens in the house once you move in...I think that would be enough to scare me!