Split from Husband...need advice please

linclass

Hello,
I've left the marital home and moved in with someone I've known 3 years. His wife (she's started divorce proceedings) is claiming 1/2 of his RAF pension (he's 53, no longer in the RAF and working full time). My question is, as I'm the guilty party (left Husband) could I claim half of his pension? He has a works pension and not yet reached retirement age to draw the state pension.

Thanks in advance,

Tigsteroonie

I don't know the details of pension sharing (it wasn't something to consider in my divorce!), but I can advise you to stop referring to yourself as the "guilty party" When it comes to financial proceedings on divorce, there is no innocent/guilty party - the reason for divorce has no bearing on the monetary division.

I do know that pension sharing gets incredibly complicated, so would recommend that you get legal advice.

For more information about the two processes of divorce & financial division, check out the guides on the Wikivorce website. [If only I had a penny for every person I say that to ...]

linclass

Many thanks Tigsteroonie, I do try not to think of myself as *guilty* and am convinced all our friends and neighbours blame me... they probably don't, lol. I'll look at the site you suggest.

x

Tigsteroonie

linclass wrote: »

Many thanks Tigsteroonie, I do try not to think of myself as *guilty* and am convinced all our friends and neighbours blame me... they probably don't, lol. I'll look at the site you suggest.

x

That's pretty standard. People on here will also blame you too. Just ignore them, they have not walked in your shoes.

Netwizard

Tigsteroonie wrote: »

People on here will also blame you too. Just ignore them, they have not walked in your shoes.

Cheating on your husband is pretty !!!!!! but to screw him for half of his pension too is just rubbing it in! (imo!). Still, as long as I keep reading threads like this, I know i'll never get married!!

mountainofdebt

Of course the OP's husband can also ask for her assets to be taken into account as well - so here's hoping she doesn't win / inherit any money whilst the financial settlement is being finalised

sacha28

Would you have even considered this course of action had your lover's ex not brought it up?

Just wondering.....

Alikay

I've only known details of a couple of divorces recently but both were similar ages to us (late 40's-early 50's), both had been lengthy marriages with grown-up children. Both involved pension-sharing, and selling and dividing proceeds of the of marital home.

thorsoak

linclass wrote: »

Many thanks Tigsteroonie, I do try not to think of myself as *guilty* and am convinced all our friends and neighbours blame me... they probably don't, lol. I'll look at the site you suggest.

x

....if the cap fits ........

sacha28

I do find it unbelievable that there are people out there who will rip everything they can from their ex....from their heart to their hard earned pension.

Personally I don't care what the law states. Why the hell should someone be entitled to take half of a pension that one person has worked all of their lives for? What's your pension looking like? Is it nice and hefty so his 50% is looking like a good bet? Or do you not work so don't pay into a pension so you're laughing?

I don't know the in's and out's of your previous relationship, it's none of my business, but, morally, I think it's a disgustingly selfish act to try and exhort as much as you can from a pot that HE has put into all of his life.

6feet

sacha28 wrote: »

I do find it unbelievable that there are people out there who will rip everything they can from their ex....from their heart to their hard earned pension.

Personally I don't care what the law states. Why the hell should someone be entitled to take half of a pension that one person has worked all of their lives for? What's your pension looking like? Is it nice and hefty so his 50% is looking like a good bet? Or do you not work so don't pay into a pension so you're laughing?

I don't know the in's and out's of your previous relationship, it's none of my business, but, morally, I think it's a disgustingly selfish act to try and exhort as much as you can from a pot that HE has put into all of his life.

Possibly because she has bore and raised children which is an unpaid job??


I know that my pension is not even close to my DH's as I have had to take career breaks etc around our two children, and it is currently getting hammered again because I am on a 75% job share to facilitate child/home responsibilities.


If our marriage goes south my DH has been told the pension will be split 50/50 which I hope is the reason he stays with me and just accepts his lot in life...ROTFL