Finally...

BitterAndTwisted

This has been a long time coming, Aileth. I'd have thrown in the towel a long, long time ago.

Regardless of whether or how you dispose of the property you MUST get him out of there first. To do anything else would be far too risky. As you are married, if you move out, I doubt he would be considered a sub-letter. But as has been proven, he cannot be relied on to pay the full mortgage on it if you don't, so out he must go.

Get all of your joint bank accounts closed as soon as possible!

Addiscomber

Don't want to throw a spanner in the works but, regardless of whose name they are in, surely the share of the house and the car are assets of the marriage?

ostrichnomore_2

After only 3 years? Maybe, but probably not, especially if he did not contribute financially. Aileth - you do need some advice on this.

It could well be another reason not to allow him to remain and pay the mortgage going forward.

Sorry this has all happened to you Aileth, but hope you get all the support you need from your family. Your Dad could obviously hear that this time it is really serious, and I'm sure they want what's best for you. Chin up, hon.

BitterAndTwisted

Three years could be considered by a court (if it gets to that, and that's not certain by any means) as a "short marriage" where each party is restored to the position they were in upon marriage, so if Aileth bought the property before getting married he may not have any claim on it.

If the car is registered to you, get the damned keys back. You're the one paying for it, after all. After you've done that and closed all joint bank accounts, ask him to leave.

RAS

Three years is enough for things to be assets of the marriage.

BUT with £5K in equity by the time the sale is completed on the house there will be virtually no money to share.

The car may be a different issue but it depends on how exactly it is financed.

aileth

He has not paid a penny on the mortgage and the deposit was all mine. The V5 is in my name, car finance solely in my name and comes out of my sole bank account

marisco_2

I am very sorry to hear of the upset and anguish you must be going through right now aileth. To not feel able to place trust in the person you share your life with, and to lack the security of knowing where you stand with them, is one of the worst feelings. Trust and honesty are the foundations of a happy marriage and without them most relationships fall apart.

I am glad for you that you have the love and support of your parents. I hope that it will help you to talk things over with them. Taking your time to reach such a momentous decision is wise, and it will help with your recovery from any break up if that is what you choose to do.

The fear that you are feeling over going it alone resonated with me. I felt the same a few years back when I divorced my husband. Knowledge is a powerful tool in enabling you to feel comfortable and at ease about taking any new direction in life. It may be useful for you to contact a solicitor and take their advice and guidance on how best to proceed. Then you can make confident, informed decisions. I also found the CAB very helpful. My thoughts are with you.

meer53

Put a notice of disassociation on your credit file as soon as you can. Especially if you have any joint accounts together.

Gingernutty

It sounds as if it would be easier if he moved out, you stayed until it sold and then moved........

quidsy

Don't allow him to stay, he must move out, take back the car, close all joint accounts & until you get the house sold you are better off staying put untill all financials are resolved.