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Childcare at 7.45am

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  • The fact that some schools have a set year when children 'must' be collected (which is not enforceable) shows that even in education settings things are not perfect. The parents of a perfectly capable child a year below the arbitrary limit should not face a referral to social services when a child two years older, but utterly incapable probably wouldn't even be noticed leaving alone.

    Arbitrary age limits do not protect children in situations like this. In fact in many cases they breed over-confidence in children beyond a certain age who actually may not be capable of what they are 'allowed' to do.

    Schools don't know children and their capabilities outwith the school gates. How many people have had a school report and hardly recognised the child? It's something you hear all of the time - quiet children come out of their shells, chatty children are quiet etc etc. So why on earth should people who have never crossed a road (and who mostly nowadays don't live in the area of the school so do not know the route) with my child have any say in when it is deemed acceptable for them to walk to school?
  • elaine373
    elaine373 Posts: 1,427 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
    edited 16 February 2014 at 8:00PM
    FBaby wrote: »
    Sorry, don't mean to be patronizing, but this made me smile. We take a 'chance' with our children's safety all the time. That's the balance we parents make between keeping them safe and teaching them to become independent beings. We make a judgement based on culture, values, common sense, gut feelings etc... All in all, it means there are not usually huge variance between parents, but enough that some think there are in a position to judge.

    But we minimize the risks and sending a 7 and 9 year old out to walk to a breakfast club, without checking that they are there safely, is in my opinion risky. There is a difference between encouraging children to become independent to putting them in a situation that is risky.I am not judging anyone but the op asked for opinions and that is mine. I hope she manages to sort something out. She clearly has doubts, or she wouldn't have asked on this forum.
    “Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. Your really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.” Lucille Ball.
  • FBaby wrote: »
    Because all 8 year olds develop the same?

    Guidance from the NSPCC regarding children under 8 and not being able to judge speed of traffic is in this advice booklet for parents here:

    http://www.nspcc.org.uk/help-and-advice/for-parents-and-carers/guides-for-parents/out-alone/out-alone_wda90714.html
  • elaine373 wrote: »
    But we minimize the risks and sending a 7 and 9 year old out to walk to a breakfast club, without checking that they are there safely, is in my opinion risky. There is a difference between encouraging children to become independent to putting them in a situation that is risky.I am not judging anyone but the op asked for opinions and that is mine. I hope she manages to sort something out. She clearly has doubts, or she wouldn't have asked on this forum.

    I agree - there is a difference between the OP making a choice when children are in their duty of care, eg going outside to play but adding in that they are going to school and sch to have then school then has responsibility of checking children are there ok is a lot to ask and a big shoulder of responsibility on others.
  • bylromarha wrote: »
    Thanks for the bit in bold. So proud of my boy! It's been a while since he was earning, so we're pleased that this role has come along for him.

    And LOVE the safety centre! Didn't know place like that existed. We made up our own "safety centre" activities for the kids as part of their road safety/stranger danger training we've been undertaking with them since the word go.

    Like I said, we know we can trust them with the walk as we've been trusting them to walk alone to familiar local places since they were 5 and 7. (at which point some of you will be going :eek::eek::eek::eek: ) It's been a priority to us to allow them the freedom to go to the park, the swings and other places independently from us, so we've put countless hours into getting to the point where they can do this.

    But its not just your children who you have to trust. I know that near my children's school there are at least 6 convicted peadophiles and I don't trust them. While I would let my children walk down from the car park at 8:50 when there are lots of parents and children around I wouldn't let them do it at 8am when there will be no one around.

    Also, while it might be okay as a one off, a regular wait for the breakfast club might be noticed by someone who hasn't got good intentions.

    Personally, I wouldn't take the risk. But each to their own.
  • poet123
    poet123 Posts: 24,099 Forumite
    stardoman wrote: »
    But its not just your children who you have to trust. I know that near my children's school there are at least 6 convicted peadophiles and I don't trust them. While I would let my children walk down from the car park at 8:50 when there are lots of parents and children around I wouldn't let them do it at 8am when there will be no one around.

    Also, while it might be okay as a one off, a regular wait for the breakfast club might be noticed by someone who hasn't got good intentions.

    Personally, I wouldn't take the risk. But each to their own.

    This would be my concern.
  • Person_one
    Person_one Posts: 28,884 Forumite
    Tenth Anniversary 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    poet123 wrote: »
    This would be my concern.

    I hope the OP reads that post.

    It wouldn't have occurred to me, but its a very good point.
  • Have come to this abit late and haven't read all the replies but I honestly think you're barking even thinking about letting children that young walk to school on their own at such an early time.

    Not only is there the issue of safety, but are you really suggesting you trust a 7 yr to look at the clock and go right time for school? Or lock up properly? And I haven't even started on the dark winter nights (yes mornings may be getting lighter now but can't you remember how dark it was back in December.

    Nope, you definitely need to rethink this one
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  • FBaby
    FBaby Posts: 18,374 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    But we minimize the risks and sending a 7 and 9 year old out to walk to a breakfast club, without checking that they are there safely, is in my opinion risky. There is a difference between encouraging children to become independent to putting them in a situation that is risky

    Indeed, it is in your opinion which you now clarify, but it is not how it was written in your initial post. You consider this situation risky and wouldn't put your children in that situation, but you might consider other situation safe that OP wouldn't agree with, hence the notion of perception.
    Guidance from the NSPCC regarding children under 8 and not being able to judge speed of traffic is in this advice booklet for parents here:

    Hence why it is guidance because they themselves appreciate that not all children have the same level of maturity when it comes to judging speed. They also appreciate that some children will have been taught to do so from an early age, whilst kids over 10 will have parents who take them everywhere in cars and never had the opportunity.

    The difference between children when it comes to responsibility is huge. Just last week, a mum asked me if my DD was going with a group of friends to our closest city as she was concerned letting her DD on the train or bus without an adult. I was quite surprised as my DD has been doing so for 3 years without one incident but I appreciate that children are different and their parents' perception even more.
  • FBaby
    FBaby Posts: 18,374 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    Not only is there the issue of safety, but are you really suggesting you trust a 7 yr to look at the clock and go right time for school? Or lock up properly? And I haven't even started on the dark winter nights (yes mornings may be getting lighter now but can't you remember how dark it was back in December.

    Just for info, OP's children would leave with her, the issue is that she would drop them off a few streets before the breakfast club for them to walk on their own, the equivalent of about 10 minutes walk.
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