Looking for someone, but finding it hard!

geoffky

Get a female friend to pretend to be your girlfriend...They seem to come flocking then...

Buzzybee90

Tell them you have 40k in savings.

Just kidding.

A watched pot never boils. Just go with the flow, someone will turn up out of the blue.

getmore4less

Networking,

If your mates are hooking up the new GF will have friends looking.
(try to go to group events)

Talk to everyone, anyone, anywhere (include people out of your age group and sexual preference) it builds up confidence.
(I found somewhere cheap to live by using this technique)

Do things that attracts regulars(work, gym, comedy clubs, pubs, meetup...) but has a purpose(more networking).

Don't neglect establishing new male friends.

A technique some use, don't be fussy, then work up, as geoffky says women seem to be a bit like jobs easier to get a new one when you have one.

Just remember to resign before taking up the new post.

DKLS

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

Such things exist? Wow! Sounds like a money making scheme set up to exploit the vulnerable. Workshops on how to attract women, I've heard everything now!

OP, like others have said, a good way for a relationship to develop is to be good friends with a person first. Is there are classes you can go to, or clubs you can join perhaps?

They do exist, whether they work or not or are good value for money is another thing.


If the OP wants to meet ladies without the pressure of talking to them, I would suggest going to a dance class, ideally something like Tango or Salsa.


The female to male ratio at these events is in favour of the men, and as my old Salsa teacher told me, if you cant pull at a Salsa night you may as well chop it off.


As long as you can learn a few moves, smell nice and have mints you will be beating them off.

19lottie82

OP, I will tell you this for free......

The main thing that women are attracted to, so much more than looks / muscles is......confidence!

Even if you have the looks / body, you prob won't get very far without confidence.

Are you in situations where you get to know girls regularly? Do you "put yourself out there" by making the first move and going to talk to girls in the gym, or other social settings?

And, once you do meet girls, do you just act "friendly" and hope things progress? A lot of girls don't like to make the first move.

The most important thing you can do (apart from acting confident, but not cocky) is to speak to a girl. Ask her about herself and act interested.

Also, last but not least, if you do find yourself on a "date" or in a position where things are looking on the up, DO NOT come across as too keen, there is nothing worse!

Oh and I'm female, but didn't get my first serious boyfriend until I was 28. Don't worry, it will happen!

skattykatty

I have never been that interested in a relationship but the last few years everyone I know is meeting people and I'm just on the side lines.

So you're now interested because of what you see around you? It sounds like you have gone along as a satellite orbiting someone else's life.Put yourself at the centre of your life. You may look fine and be fit, but it sounds like you aren't that confident. As others have said - confidence is key.

Are you lonely because your friends now spend more time with their partners? What do you do that fulfils you? A man (or woman) who seems comfortable in their skin and content with their choices and life is actually very attractive!

Tancred

100saving wrote: »

Hello everyone,

I'm looking for some advice. I am 22 and never had a girlfriend! I know what your going to say..

I think I'm ok looking, no model but always make an effort to look good. I'm a fit guy who works-out a lot not a bodybuilder but toned.

I have never been that interested in a relationship but the last few years everyone I know is meeting people and I'm just on the side lines. I want to meet someone that i can have a relationship, go on holiday with, share things with and one day a few kids with.

I'm finding it hard as whenever i go out i see people look at me and i look at them but thats as far as it ever goes. i just don't have it in me to go up and talk to them. what do i say? i have never really tried to chat up a women or whatever you call it and tbh i have no idea what to do!

all i know is I'm passing thought life and feel lonely but can't get out of this rut. everyone keeps asking if i have met anyone and when i see other people so happy and i have no one!

has anyone been in this place before?

I never had a proper girlfriend of any kind until I was in my late 20s. Have you considered joining one of the online dating organisations?

Confidence has a lot to do with it, because women simply will not be interested if you tell them all your troubles. They won't go out with you if they feel sorry for you. Basically, women are pretty superficial when it comes to sex - they want a confident guy who is full of s**t and can act as if he owns the world. It's the caveman instinct - women want to be 'protected', what they don't want to do is to be the ones who do the protecting (unless you're a baby of course).

I've known lots of really nice girls go out with absolute jerks. Why? Because they made them feel good. Unfortunately, being the nice guy they just weren't interested in me. Also it seems to help if you're tall (I'm only 5' 9") - again it's the caveman thing about protection etc.

The trouble is that many men would like a second 'mummy' in whom they can confide and who will cuddle them, reassure them etc. I'm afraid it doesn't work like that.