Stretching the pennies

Seanymph

On a slightly different tack:

If you give up work (I did) you have time to do something else.

You can do a degree with the OU at home if you only take 6 years you get funding (complete funding if you qualify - it's free if you dont' already have one!).

They have all sorts of other free courses if you don't want to do a degree.

You can retrain - lots of colleges have subsidised or free courses and loads have creches.

Leisure centres and adult education centres had free creches when mine were little.

I volunteered - local charities - they often paid for courses which gave me a chance to upskill.

I worked part time from home - (still get paid for charities now funnily enough) - clerking (local council, school governors, charities)...

I even did a paperround for a while (well, it was £16 a week and I only did it on a thursday - pushing the buggy).

You can do shift work if you need to, say two evenings a week when hubby is at home.

You could set up a business.

You could write a book.

You could set up a group for mums who feel isolated and meet in the local village hall.

Being a SAHM doesn't mean you have no challenges, or opportunities, or adult company.

I ran a community shop with a group of likeminded people, and organised balls, and was on the board of a local playgroup - and did grant applications for them - and ended up a school governor.

I took courses and never passed my degree but did some of it - and have never ever gone back to full time work. I didn't need to, and I certainly don't want to!

You don't suddenly become a different person if you don't work- in fact, I was never busier!

But being at home with my kids, spending so much time with them - taking them to swimming and gymnastics and all the other wretched clubs, and being the mum that did the school ru n, and was phoned when they were sick and could get there without cancelling meetings... That was priceless.

You'll be fine - if you want to be with your kids don't let anyone make you feel you should be working.

You can earn money around them - and still be there. And you can still do things for yourself with all the time you have to choose what you do.

And without working it's easier to cut back, trawl the oldstyle board, and generally save money.

Spendless

My first thought was to ask if you could leave a slightly bigger age gap between children, so that the eldest was at f-time school by the time you were returning to work from maternity leave, and then you'd have nursery costs for the youngest but only before, after school and holiday costs for the eldest. So, I can see with my line of thought this is relevant

zcrat41 wrote: »

How old are you?

MrsSippi wrote: »

Why does that matter? Not offended or annoyed, just wondering why you asked.

because if you are going to answer, I'm already 44 and my child is 2 then you probably haven't got enough time left for my suggestion.

JodyBPM

I must say, if having another child meant I only had £100 left at the end of the month, and I had to become a SAHM when I didn't really want to, I wouldn't have another child.

I'm sure you can find a way to make it work, but do you really want to?
Only you can answer that, but I'd want a cushion of *much* more than £100.

I think it is reasonable for your husband to be worried.

pelirocco

JodyBPM wrote: »

I must say, if having another child meant I only had £100 left at the end of the month, and I had to become a SAHM when I didn't really want to, I wouldn't have another child.

I'm sure you can find a way to make it work, but do you really want to?
Only you can answer that, but I'd want a cushion of *much* more than £100.

I think it is reasonable for your husband to be worried.

There any many people out there who dont have the ''luxury'' of being a SAHM and dont have a cushion at all . In fact it years gone by when SAHM were the norm most families just got by , I was brought up in such a family ,. We could all cut back much more if we had to

I would go for it OP , you really never know what life has in store , and while its good to be prepared , preparing for something that may never happen and putting your life on hold isnt worth it