My DMP Journey...

Monkeyballs

Friday 24/01/14:

I woke up this morning as felt ok actually... I was a bit stiff but not in the same pain I have been

I've been downstairs and made a cup of tea and I've a little bit of a niggle but it'd ok... Then there was knock at the door!

A DPD driver with a medium size box, I check the name on it and sign and ask if it's heavy as I have a back back "nah" he says as he hands it to me "it says chair on the side, it's only about 20kg"... IDIOT!

So I pretty much drop it as pain shoots up my back and the guy looks at me like I'm an idiot and walks away!!! Nice, cheers mate!!!

That was a couple of hours ago and the pain is now subsiding - for a moment I was healed!!! For a moment I was normal so annoying but if can wake up and feel like that every morning I'll be happy next I just need to be able to sit down LOL

Financially, no change expected today as I'm not going out

MB

Monkeyballs

Saturday 25/01/14:

Well, it's 04:30 as I start to type this and I've been awake for just over two hours now

I'm not tired as I slept through a health portion of Friday due to a mix of pain and painkillers - I'm turning into an Owl! LOL

On a more positive note, I have checked my bank account and I've been paid today instead of Monday which is nice as I have just paid my DMP, Rent, topped up my phone for the next month and moved some money into a separate food budget account which means I'm ahead of the game! LOL

Not sure what the rest of today is going to bring... I may look to see if I can get an good online deal for hopping home delivery, maybe with free delivery and cash back you never know...

I checked my Barclaycard balance and made a £6.40 overpayment so now it is at a nice round £1940 more will follow to BC as well soon after they've charged interest LOL but for the moment it looks pretty

OMG!!! It is done... My brother has just handed me £250 and I have just caled and accepted an F&F with the Cheque Centre... £230 paid with £720(ish) written off!!! So close to grand LOL, it is going to be very satisfying updating my DMP and boasting on forums LOL

Edit: It's 21:49 and my buzz from today has taken a bit of a hit as I've been asked to start going back into the office from next week... I'm a little apprehensive about getting there and back and have horrible images of my spine being ripped out of my back on the bus ride there and having to lay down in a corner crying like a baby until the pain has subsided to the point where I can get back on the bus to go home and start the crying all over again still, if I don't try then I won't know and if I do go in and it kills me then at least my boss will know I'm genuine!

MB

Monkeyballs

Sunday the 26th of January in the Monkeyballs house and Monkeyballs is drinking a cup of tea and updating his debt diary...

Dear diary,

It's raining in fact, it's pouring!!!

Last night my back was aching so I didn't sleep well but it didn't help that I'm panicking about travelling to and from work next week

I say panicking, that's possibly too strong a word maybe concerned?

What happens if I get halfway and need to get off because of back pain? I'll be stranded potentially getting soaked and miles from anywhere with no option but to walk... I'm worried it will make my back worse and if I go back to the doctors afterwards then I might get signed off for even longer! I don't know what I'm doing LOL hopefully everything will work out but I'm a stress head

A for my debts, I don't think I'll be paying anything more off this month except for the odd small PAD's - we'll see though I'm happy with the chunk I've already paid (YAY!).

MB

Puzzcat

Hi mb,
Could you ask your employer if you could do reduced hours to enable you to travel out of rush hour? Maybe easier on public transport avoiding the pushing and shoving?
Puzz.x

Monkeyballs

Puzzcat wrote: »

Hi mb,
Could you ask your employer if you could do reduced hours to enable you to travel out of rush hour? Maybe easier on public transport avoiding the pushing and shoving?
Puzz.x

Hi Puzz,

Already done that and they have agreed to me going back and just doing a few hours across midday three or four days a week so I'm good in that respect

It really is just a case of my not being able to sit down for more than 5 or 10 minutes and then only being able to stand in the same place for similar lengths of time! I almost need to be able to wander up and down the bus LOL then of course I need to figure out how to be at my desk as I wander around...

I'm sure it will all be ok in the end, it's just been a while and I don't want to go back to square one again six or seven weeks of pain is enough thank you very much

MB

Puzzcat

Hi MB,


A friend of mine slipped a disc last April (picking up washing!), she even had to miss her 50th birthday weekend away.. I didn't go either, didn't seem right celebrating without her.. we are going to do it at a later date... She was off work for 5 months, had various treatments like physio/accupunture and in the end went private and had a scan as she is still waiting for the NHS one... She mysteriously got better in August and although she says she still gets pins and needle type feelings in her foot she seems okay otherwise.. weird...


I remember her coming round to dinner with the girls and spending the time walking up and down or lying on the floor.. sounds similar to you..


All you can do is your best, if its too much then you will need to see your gp and be signed off again.. you have to take care of you..
Love Puzz. x

in_need_of_direction

It is scary but at least your boss seems supportive. Could you benefit from an adapted chair? if so, ask if this could be provided by way of reasonable adjustment? also, don't panic as the stress will make it harder for muscles to relax - you know how that ends. Keep us posted

Monkeyballs

Cheers guys

Weirdly hearing from folk who have no idea who I am is really supportive lol and I have no idea why lol

I work for a pretty big company so support and various equipment isn't an issue, I guess I feel guilty about having been off for so long and now that it's starting to be less painful (or I'm more used to the pain, I'm not sure which it is) it's worse because I feel I ought to go back in...

My worry is that totally random little things set it off and when I get a flare up there is nothing I can do but try and find a position to get comfy in (normally laid down on my back with my knees up and a towel under my back or kneeling down with my head on the ground in a sort of foetal position) and it can take hours before I can even stand up again!

Also, as a part of my recovery I need to go out of the house and take short walks (20-30 mins tops, any more and I'm shattered and doubled up) so people see me and I look sort of ok I'm just grimacing a bit and grinding my knuckles into my back as I limp along lol and to be honest, if I saw me in the street I'd think I was pulling a fast one!

And in typing that I think I see what really scares me (excluding the pain which just grinds you down), what other people think! The only time I've ever had serious physical pain before is when I had the flu and it was in all my joints and muscles but was so doped up I barely noticed so when someone in the past has said "Ow! I hurt my back!" I've never really got it? Does that make sense? So if I've never got it, what are others who have never had it thinking? Grrr... I should know better than that!

Fingers crossed I'll simply jump on (or step gingerly on) the bus and I'll be able to do a combo of sitting and standing to get there and I'll be able to use some kit to get comfy enough to do a couple of hours before they tell me I have to do full time hours again the following week :huh:

Thanks again it really does help

MB

Monkeyballs

Monday 27/01/14:

It's 00:40, I can't get comfy enough to go to sleep and I have a (what feels like grueling) physio session at 08:00 before which I need to get showered and walk there which combined is going to be about an hour... Not that I'm feeling sorry for myself for anything lol today is going to be great!

Silver linings? I'm strugglng... My room is warm and GI Joe is on Channel 4+1 LOL ummm... I have a cup of tea and pain killers which I'm waiting to take effect and an out of date Twix which I got from Tesco for 5p... WAHOOO! Living the dream...

So I did manage to get to sleep but it was about 03:00ish and I was up again at 06:00 so tired... So tired and I ache and I've just put the kettle in the fridge and brought the milk to my room leaving the coffee in the kitchen LOL oh dear...

Excellent, so I went to physio and passed out. It's not the first time, it's happened a few times after doing something which made my back flare up but it freaked my physiotherapist out and made me an emergency appointment with my GP and now I have been fully signed off for two weeks and have a selection of scans, acupuncture and appointments made for the rest of the week! I won't be bored anyway... And my boss once again has been great, even after I had a mini panic attack down the phone at him LOL will this ever end?

Even more frustrating is that I have stronger painkillers and anti depressants both of which will cost me @rse

MB

Monkeyballs

Tuesday 28/01/14:

Stronger anti depressants used and I slept from about midnight until about 09:30! It's like someone turned the lights on! My back is still aching but even that seems different, it's gone from a general ache and stiffness all over my back, shoulders and upper legs to just my lower back? I'm taking that to be a good thing... It certainly feels much better!

So today is the start of my less strenuous routine with a few 5 minute walks instead of two 20-30 minute ones, hopefully not feeling ok at the start and end of my walks will help more than my slightly grueling longer ones

Time will tell but today already feels better and it's only been one night! I just have to ignore the urge to push myself to see what I can do...

First walk over and perhaps 5 minutes is too short as I can't even get to the corner shop and back in that time LOL - a couple of 10 min walks are on the cards I do feel better for getting back home while not in pain

Booo! I just found out that I need to buy a TV licence but it's not just me, it's others in the house too as it's a shared house and we all have locks on our doors but maybe... So that's £29 for six months and a further £12 per month after that... Booo! Oh well, it's better than a £1000 fine I guess Booo!!!

MB