Teenage Mum first time out in the big world

motherbear1

Hello everyone,
hope this is the right place to post, apologies if it's not -admin please move post
pls be kind, it's my first time


I am here to ask for some help and guidance
I am a young single mum (18) baby is 6mths old
who has just secured her first home (rented 2 bed terrace) with electric storage heaters and gas fire, both are on pre pay metres, Tariff E7
a fully equipped kitchen appliances and furniture are provided (lucky me, thanks to friends finding a good landlady)
it's my first time living on my own with a baby and I am also on Benefits, I am also in College finishing my courses, because I want to work as soon as possible.
I am a bit anxious of how I am going to make it all work? I can't ask my parents, we're estranged to be polite, so no help from there, most of my friends have no kids and live at home, so no help from them, my babys dad isn't in the picture either


My rent is going to be paid directly to the Landlady, so that's sorted
But I have no idea on how to manage a household, cook ,clean , shop -managing money or even budgeting for things, what do I have to calculate/ budget for? will my benefits cover that? where can cut back? how much shall I keep for electric and gas, what will food cost me?
is there any other single mums on benefits/ low income who can give me some tips and ideas on how to do this?
budgeting and meal planning would be a great help
thanks for listening
MB1

Lozzy88

You will be payed your rent and then you will have to pay your landlady.

You need to inform all your suppliers water/gas/elec where you now live and these will send you bills.

If you havnt already make sure you have applied for healthy start vouchers this will cover most of your babys milk. Food you could do fairly cheaply, if you are weaning baby buy a hand blender and a load of veg and make your own.

Good luck I have my first baby at 19 its hard work but worth it other people will know more and will help too.

eta sorry for all the typos Its a super quick response.

booter

Hello and welcome :wave: Well, you're in the right place.

Ensure that you're getting all the benefits to which you're entitled - benefits calculator here or contact your local CAB.

As far as budgeting, you'll need to find out exactly what your outgoings are and compare them to your income. Outgoings include Rent, Council Tax (if you have to pay) Gas, Electricity, Water Rates (unless they're included in your rent) TV licence (if you need one) - I'm just trying to think of things that'll get you into trouble if you don't pay! Actually, thinking about it, there's a useful budgeting guide here!

Your food bill will take a little while to figure out, but my advice would be to learn to cook if you don't already. You can make a little go quite a long way if you know what you're doing (there are a load of recipe and thrifty cooking ideas on this board!) Oh, and always make a shopping list and never go food shopping on an empty stomach - it helps to stop those impulse buys

I hope that'll give you a starting point - I'm sure others will be along shortly with more advice

calicocat

Hi,

You need to ring the electricity provider and check with them when your cheapest hours are to use electricity I think. I had something like E7 years ago, and using leccy during the day cost a fortune, and doing the washing etc worked out cheaper to do at night. It could be that your system is different but worth a check.

Write down all monies you have coming in and the things that you know will be going out, your landlady may have an idea what the place costs to run from an electric and gas point of view.

Off the top of my head:
Rent
Gas
Leccy
Tv
Phone
Insurance (contents of house, your things)
C.tax (if it applies)
Transport (buses you may need to get)
Clothes
Food
Toiletries
Baby's things.

You must have an idea now what it costs a month for your baby's needs?
Clothes for now will be probably not in the picture largely, but you will at some point need to get things.

You don't need lots of cleaning products, just the basics and a bit of work...best to have less chemicals anyway.

Food....if don't already, learn how to cook, it will save you a fortune. lots and lots of brilliant stuff to read on here for that. If you learn to make a basic veg soup it costs very little and can see you through for lunches for days..if not a week.

If you have a freezer all the better as you can make a load and freeze in portions.

Spag bol is pretty cheap to make and you can get pasta for pennies.

There is just you to feed so if you roast a chicken you can get say:

2 x roast diners (from the breast, one side if you aren't a big eater)
1 x chicken risotto (chicken rice veg etc...half a breast)
1 x chicken pie or a stir-fry...(half a breast)

With the legs you can make a pie, or again mix it with veg for srir-fry, or make chicken soup, or chop up and make coronation chicken for sandwiches/wrap. Or just have as is with chips or salad.

Dont throw the carcass out....simmer it in water to make chicken stock for your soups.

If at any point you have any spare cash invest in a slow cooker...cheap to run, and you can leave them cooking whilst you are out or asleep over night. You just throw it all in and it does the rest, great if you don't know how to cook much yet, and good for cooking cheaper cuts of meat as it all comes out tender.


Loads more people will be along with fab ideas and links to other threads, and spend a bit of time mooching on here, you will learn loads very quick.



How exciting for you....good luck....and you have come to a good place right from the start. loads of helpful people.

Willowpop

Hello and welcome to the forum!

I would make a food shopping list and stick to it. Work out some meal plans for the week and go buy food for them meals.As you can see in one of the previous posts, a chicken goes a long way as does a pack of minced beef..you can make all sorts from mince.
Do you have a lidl or aldi near you? They have excellent prices on food...much cheaper for most things than the big 4 supermarkets.

Willowpop

Just another thought..sorry, , it's early so thoughts come in fits and starts... if you don't already, make a packed lunch for college, it'll save you loads of money compared to eating out all of the time, unless you have an amazing canteen there that is really heavily subsidised. Work out what you pay each day if you eat at college and then work out what it would cost to make a packed lunch up and go for the cheapest.

Clytemnestra

I would recommend that you find your local Children's Centre and see what they can offer. They often do cookery courses for young mums, and if nothing else you will meet other mums with babies and be able to share ideas. If you don't know where it is, ask your Health Visitor

poppyjane

If you don't already get free childcare from your college, ask if there are grants available to help with this. And as has already been mentioned, getting involved with local baby groups will give you a support network. Good luck - you can do it!! I'm a lot older than you, but hex (ex husband) walked out when she was only 3 months old. She's 9 now, and I'm nearly qualified as a chartered accountant. Yes, it's been some of the hardest times imaginable, but I look at how well she's turned out, and I think... HA. She's all mine

Jane xxx

gayleygoo

I'm not a single mum, but have been a young parent on a low income. You'll need to work out what money you have left after essential bills have been paid, and divide that up between food, clothes, and household necessities.

Food budget can be a tricky one, and depends on your cooking skills! However this is a great time to learn if you don't already. Our family dinners consist mainly of things like:

Spaghetti bolognese
Chilli con carne
Mince with veg and gravy, and potatoes
Cabbage, bacon and potatoes (or bubble and squeak)
Cheap curries made with chicken legs
Cheese pie (maybe with bacon and veg)
Baked potatoes with beans/bacon/tuna/cheese/salad etc
Toast with scrambled egg
Toad in the hole
Stir fry

If you'd like to learn more about cooking and food planning, ask at your local SureStart centre, they often run free cooking courses. They may also provide childcare, baby/toddler groups and lots of other services, so sign up if you haven't already! Ours also has a young parents group that provides advice and support, and cups of tea and biscuits

Your baby is the age where she/he may be starting solid food? Those little jars will cost you a fortune if you use them full-time, and can be limited in the nutrition that they provide. Have you heard of or considered Baby-led-weaning? It's basically where you provide your baby with small pieces of food that they can pick up and eat themselves. My DS was eating the same food that we were from 6-7months old, he never had purees and didn't even liked mashed food.

Baby stuff and clothing - we hardly bought anything new for our children. There's no need, and new children's clothes are so expensive these days. Most of their clothes come from friends and relatives who are happy to get rid of the stuff! So try second-hand shops for things, there's one near us let you fill a black bin bag for £5, maybe somewhere near you offers something similar? Toys aren't really necessary for a baby, they will have so much fun playing in paper and boxes and pulling stuff out of your drawers Again, we love charity shop toys - they sell them cheap and can be taken back when you're fed-up of tripping over them!

Don't feel pressured into buying things you don't need. There will always be things that baby-product companies will try to insist that you do "need", but that you really don't! If it seems overpriced, then it probably is. Freecycle and Gumtree might be good sources of free/cheap things that you do need.

Nappies - the brand names can be a rip-off! I used mainly cloth nappies which saved loads of money, but found the Lidl disposable nappies to be great when I did use them, and they were good value.

I'm not sure if you have car access or can easily get to a supermarket? If not, try online deliveries from supermarkets. They do charge a small amount for delivery but you save that money by not impulse buying things you don't need in the store.

If you can, start a small savings account/tin for putting small change in or putting away money when you can afford to. There will be times when an unexpected bill arrives or you have to replace something and on a low income it can really make things hard if you don't have something saved. I also have savings jars for clothes, winter fuel, and christmas/birthdays. If you can plan and save for these things it will be less stressful when the money is needed!

Also, do remember that your HV is there for you until your child is 5, if you are ever struggling just give her a call and she can provide advice and support too.

If I think of anything else I'll come back to this thread, in the meantime have a good read of the threads on this board as there is so much advice already out there on being frugal, thrifty and happy You might want to join in the Grocery Challenge, No Spend Days challenge, savings challenges etc. There are threads on cleaning cheaply, using a slow cooker, meal planning, preparing for winter, homebrewing and so much more!

[Deleted User]

If you haven't already join a library,saves a fortune on cookery books if nothing else.Plus if you are lucky enough to know anyone of ...erm how shall I put this, a slightly older generation that you can ask for tips on cooking just ask them I am the wrong side of 60 and looking 70 up the rear but have been cooking for a very lomg time and would happily help any youngster who wanted to learn as you obviously want to. Well done on starting out with the right idea that you want to provide a happy cheerful home for your little one.
Hopefully maybe your parents will adjust to the idea of being granny and grandpa's but if they don't then its their loss not yours.As long as your baby knows its loved and wanted that's the most important thing.
Make a list of your priorites.that must be paid for
1 roof over your head
2 heating(you and baby don't want to be cold)
3 food,at six months a baby can be starting to eat semi solid foods

everthing else comes after that.Haunt charity shops for things you haven't got .Even baking stuff which will help streetch your budget.I used an empty milk bottle as a rolling pin when I first got married in 1962 as we were so broke.and we only had two saucepans so spuds went into one and a tin of processed peas into the other(my late OH loved processed peas for some reason. I hated them but I was very young, and in love so he ate what he liked and a crumbled up oxo cube into the peas made the gravy :):) )
adapting what you have, and waiting to get what you want is a good maxim as borrowing isn't a good idea
Good luck to you both and I hope you have a smashing Christmas in your new home.
If you get stuck ask on here we have all been stuck at times and no question is ever daft or silly We will all help you if we can
Cheers
JackieO xxx

Bigjenny

If you are on Facebook you may find a local For Sale group in your area, and they often have baby clothes and equipment for sale.