Furnishings and I'm going mad!!!

BornAtTheRightTime

It is a fact of life that as kids get older, first they stop going on family holidays, next they move out and eventually they stop routinely coming for Christmas. Friends become more fun than family, for a while. Try not to take it so hard.

originator

BornAtTheRightTime wrote: »

It is a fact of life that as kids get older, first they stop going on family holidays, next they move out and eventually they stop routinely coming for Christmas. Friends become more fun than family, for a while. Try not to take it so hard.

which is how it should be,the time to get peed off is when they come back home(mine's only 36 hehe)

PasturesNew

As I see it, the bigger issue is the flat. Whose name is it in, did you act as guarantor, who are these other people living there, what'll happen when she leaves, what could happen before she returns. And more....

flossy_splodge

Reams wrote: »

Thanks all, I gifted the furniture from our family home ,I'm now living in a rabbit hutch.

She is travelling for months, medical volunteering so has no money for storage, I've said I'll pay any bills, but the chances of her returning to an unfurnished to use the furniture is minimal.

Sorry to be so vague, but I don't know either.

Things change from day to day and I'm tired of it. For instance, she was coming for Christmas.

No way would she work over Christmas, now she is, so it's me and the dog. Great!

I need a couple of days to sort this in my head at least. Thanks for caring to reply. I am totally peed off.

You're hurting over what you seem to be feeling is rejection of you and a lack of care about how you feel.
So may I suggest that instead of focussing on things like the furniture speak to her honestly about how you're feeling.
I understand completely how you feel but can only offer you the experience that once you accept they will do as they wish anyway so get on and sort your own life to be happy and satisfying and hey, here they come back again!
Seems like there is a generation of self obsessed youngsters out there but if you don't explain how YOU would like it to be, you can't complain if you don't get YOUR needs met.
Easy for me to say I know, not so easy to do but I promise I've been there and there aint a thing you can do to change things except make sure you've clearly communicated.
Then its up to them.
I suspect this about what you see as a change in plans when you thought something else was going to happen.
So tell her!
Good luck, try and be cheerful and have the best Christmas you can. Hugs.

AdrianC

Reams wrote: »

Thanks all, I gifted the furniture from our family home

You gifted it. Not loaned it. It's hers to do with as she pleases.

She is travelling for months, medical volunteering

So she's a "proper" adult, then. Not just a teenage student.

Things change from day to day and I'm tired of it. For instance, she was coming for Christmas.

No way would she work over Christmas, now she is, so it's me and the dog. Great!

Honestly, I think the furniture's just a symptom. Sounds like you're having a bit of difficulty accepting that those apron strings aren't tied any more. She's got a life! How dare she! Sod that. Get one for yourself, too.

dancingfairy

It sounds like the problem is more a lack of communication and a change of plans than anything else.
You need to sit down with her and have a chat. Explain the issues - ie you'd like her home for xmas, you need to make plans etc and that it's not reasonable for everyone else's plan to change to accomodate her.
df