one salary family

usa1

2 lap tops, Gyms memberships, Smart phones, overseas travel, IMHO are luxuries

Domayne

Apart from shelter, clothing, water, food and adequate heating - Most things are luxuries....tvs, laptops, mobile phones, magazines, sky tv etc you don't NEED these (i.e - You won't die without them)...people lived for hundreds of years without these things - quite happily, but these days, most of us have a 'need' mentality and keep up with the jonses attitude

Rosie_D

I'd just like to add that I'm a SAHM & my hubby is on a good wage, he has worked very hard to climb up the work ladder & taken exams etc to get him where he is today (some exams at a cost to us I might add)

Because he's on a good wage we are not entitled to any tax credits or even child benefit, but the people living nearby are both working and probably on more than him with their joint wage, but the still get tax credits & child benefits!

I was wondering how this is fair financially as we have chosen for me to stay at home with the kids, I had a really good job before we had them, it's as though this government is penalising mothers who want to actually look after their own children rather than other people doing it for them!

I remember my childhood really well & that my mum was there for me & my brother every single day & you can't get that time back, & my husband was the same too, we want our kids knowing that we were always there for them.

Please don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that mothers who work are wrong to do so, I'm just saying that too many people use the excuse of money to have to work, & we know that you can get along nicely without mothers having to work.

The post above said that 2 parent working families have twice the expense of a sole earner, but they wouldn't have these extra expenses if the mother stayed at home (or father)!

You can't put a price on being there for your own children no matter what anyone says!

savier

isn't it common in UK for grandmothers to look after their grandchildren?

FireWyrm

savier wrote: »

isn't it common in UK for grandmothers to look after their grandchildren?

You've got to be joking. The first thing my MIL told me when we said we were expecting our first child was...

"Well, I hope you dont expect me to look after it!"....

I would like to add that about 6 months later she was on the phone practically begging me to leave the baby with her for an afternoon. Yes, I made her grovel just a little.

Cycrow

savier wrote: »

thank you for your replies
it seems that indeed you CAN live with one salary

but we live in 2013 and in one of the richest economies in the world
and what one salary can offer is as far as I see well below the standard we should have

for example, is it luxury to have two laptops for the kids? to have seperate room for each? to have two cars? to get them to the gym? to buy them smartphones? to offer them holidays overseas?

these shouldn't be consider a luxury, but the standard, given where and in which era we live in

anything that isn't needed to live is a luxury.
all those things you mention you don't need and can live without, so they are luxuries.

while some people need their cars for work, most don't and are just more convenient.

FireWyrm

Cycrow wrote: »

while some people need their cars for work, most don't and are just more convenient.

Actually, I disagree with this example. You need a car for work - mostly, unless you are living in london where you have integrated public transport. For the rest of the world, there is little public transport that is practical.

Nothing however decrees that you have to have a top of the range car...one that goes from A to B is adequate. You can usually pick up a half way decent second hand run around for under £500.

iolanthe07

savier wrote: »

isn't it common in UK for grandmothers to look after their grandchildren?

Not when one grandchild lives in the USA and other three 200 miles away. This is our situation, and there are plenty of others like us.

usa1

Rosie_D wrote: »

I'd just like to add that I'm a SAHM & my hubby is on a good wage, he has worked very hard to climb up the work ladder & taken exams etc to get him where he is today (some exams at a cost to us I might add)

Because he's on a good wage we are not entitled to any tax credits or even child benefit, but the people living nearby are both working and probably on more than him with their joint wage, but the still get tax credits & child benefits!

I was wondering how this is fair financially as we have chosen for me to stay at home with the kids, I had a really good job before we had them, it's as though this government is penalising mothers who want to actually look after their own children rather than other people doing it for them!

I remember my childhood really well & that my mum was there for me & my brother every single day & you can't get that time back, & my husband was the same too, we want our kids knowing that we were always there for them.

Please don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that mothers who work are wrong to do so, I'm just saying that too many people use the excuse of money to have to work, & we know that you can get along nicely without mothers having to work.

The post above said that 2 parent working families have twice the expense of a sole earner, but they wouldn't have these extra expenses if the mother stayed at home (or father)!

You can't put a price on being there for your own children no matter what anyone says!

Mothers that work, in my experience, don't work for fancy handbags, manicures or other fripperies. They work just to pay high council tax, mortgages, which is not an excuse, as you put it, ALL credit to them.. Plus, Working parents ARE there for there children, just as SAHM`s are there for there children when the go to school.


The Govt. isn't penalising SAHMs, In facts its working women who pay SAHMs N.I Credits, currently worth approx 2.1K a year.

MrsGSR

I think in the governments eyes being a SAHM is a lifestyle choice. That may be for some but also may be because there is no choice as childcare may be too expensive to justify it.I took voluntary redundancy from my HLTA Job a few years ago, I was pregnant with my second child and had already worked out that after childcare and petrol I would be working for £40 a month on the revised hours they were offering. After having my second child I applied for a job in a supermarket, I work nights around my husband so no childcare bills and I am there for the children in the day, it's a modest wage but it gives me my own independence and means I can contribute. We do have "luxuries" such as sky and smart phones yes but we don't have fancy holidays or go out all the time.
I think you have to do what works for your families circumstances.