one salary family

claire16c

savier wrote: »

what's SOA?

As for rent, I don't see great differences, if you exclude places like central London. In my case, I am excluding London.

As for car, I think it is necessary, as in smaller cities, public transport isn't convenient. But its usage will be limited, since distances are short in small cities.

As for the kids, It's part of the question, that the single salary should support the family from childrens' birth until they will be able to leave home.

There are HUGE differences around the country.

Where I live you need around £750-800 minimum to rent a decent 2 bed flat. I dont think youd want to live somewhere much smaller with 2 kids.

Where my friend lives up north you could get somewhere for half of that.

Plus it depends if you rent privately or from a housing association/council.

Also in terms of supporting children, it depends if you want to feed and clothe them, or also be able to send them to various sports/music lessons, holidays, school trips etc.

How long is a piece of string.

Im sure its possible for some people in some areas.

FireWyrm

savier wrote: »

As for the kids, It's part of the question, that the single salary should support the family from childrens' birth until they will be able to leave home.

OK, well, lets look at this then.

Firstly, babies do not cost the earth despite what the industry would have you believe. Yes, you are going to have to factor in maternity leave, but in terms of materials necessary, it isnt expensive. You can buy a second hand cot, add a new mattress of course, second hand outer clothes from eBay and a dozen sleep suits. Washable nappies will save you around £2000 from birth to potty and mincing a portion of your own food when they are weaning rather than buying jars at 80p each is obviously going to help greatly.

Once they are weaned, you'll need a new wardrobe of clothes at about 8 months which will cost you around £200 in Tesco.

After that, you'll need to replace their clothes at about 6 monthly intervals until they go to school, but there is plenty of scope for second hand either from eBay or carboot sales. Growth slows the closer you get to 5, but beware the shrinking trouser syndrome where one week their clothes fit and the next they have absolutely nothing decent to wear that doesnt make them look like Stig of the Dump.

When they go to school, you will need a new set of school uniform and shoes every year at around £150 per child. Shoes are a continuous problem, so divert your child benefit into a separate account for the purpose of providing for their requirements. 2 sets of 'play shoes', 2 sets of school shoes and 1 set of wellies per year, per child is about right. Depending on your preference for Clarkes or some other brand, this can be around £200 per child per year. If you have a child who insists on trashing their school shoes once a month like I do, it can cost more.

From 5 to 10, you'll need a new set of casual clothes for each child once a year. This neednt be expensive either. If it's a boy, trousers, t-shirts and jumpers. If it's a girl, the same, but in pink or purple with the odd dress for special occasions.

10 - 14, continue to provide a set of clothes once a year, but there comes a whole new raft of problems. Having not experienced that yet, I cant comment. I can tell you though that if you give in to pressure, they'll walk all over you.

14 - 18, they should have a job and be contributing at least token amounts to the running of the house. At 14, obviously, it will be pennies, but towards 18, they can start paying adult rent - or an approximation of it. After 18, they can buy their own clothes, shoes and anything else they need out of the job you will tell them to get.

In terms of what they eat, you will obviously have to factor an additional mouth into your calculations. When they are babies, they eat what you do (if you are smart) with the odd jar as standby in case you fancy a vindaloo and some wine. As toddlers, they dont eat that much, about half what an adult would eat. If you buy for three adults, you can accommodate two children and two adults. Later, their appetites increase, so at about 10, they eat a very slightly smaller portion than an adult. You will have to buy enough food for four adults at that point and freeze leftovers.

I feed two adults, two children and a baby on £250 per month. It just takes discipline and planning. It doesnt happen if you just wander into the supermarket and start putting stuff in the trolly. I meal plan by the month and shop bi-weekly. I buy meat, veg and ingredients, not 'meals'. Trips to Tesco are a commando raid rather than trench warfare. I know exactly what I want, how much I'm prepared to pay for it, alternatives if what I want isnt available or too expensive (isnt on offer at the time) and how much I need. I have a discretionary budget of £10 for 'things I see on the discount shelf'. I never deviate except to see the discount shelf and take whatever is there if it is useful to me. I dont pay attention to anything within 10 feet of the door, it is the stuff the supermarket wants you to buy whether you need it or not and usually at vastly inflated price than it was last week in the normal isle.

Try out your butcher, do you know someone who keeps chickens? I need about 30 eggs a week, so I have an arrangement with a friend to buy excess output. Eggs actually keep for weeks if sealed and were fresh in the first place. Try the markets, veg is so cheap there - who cares if it is wonky. Pay 38p for a family sized punnet of unwashed and untrimmed mushrooms or £1.50 for the same punnet all washed and neatly trimmed.

Where possible, shop on a Sunday afternoon - all the best discounts appear then.

gayleygoo

My OH's income is £18k and we live on that, and tax credits/child benefit, which aren't much but it covers the children's clothes etc. We live quite frugally and don't have many luxuries or new things, but the time spent with my young children is not something I'd give up just for a few luxuries.

I think it would be sad if it was rare for families in the UK to have a stay-at-home-parent because they couldn't afford it. Obviously some people choose to work outside the home for personal reasons, but for those who have no choice but to do so, they are missing out on valuable family life.

For the first few years, children aren't that expensive. we used cloth nappies which saved hundreds of pounds, as did breastfeeding until at least one year old. We have mostly hand-me-down clothes and second hand stuff which helps. After that, it's up to you what you spend on them!

nick500

Yes you can!

Firstly. We discovered the hard way about what a rip off letting agents are:mad:.
We were new to renting and found out the hard way what pondlife these people are. We had to pay 6 months rent up front, pay for credit checks, carpet insurance etc.. I met the landlord and after our initial 6 months we both decided to knock these parasites on the head and have our own monthly rolling contract. We've now been here a happy 6 years.

Our first child was born 6 years ago and our second three years ago.
I take home £1200 per month. Which in reality is a pittance but I don't work weekends or overtime and sometimes enjoy my job.
I pay all the bills £1040 per month inc £625 rent and my wife pays for the shopping with child benefit etc.
We run a small diesel car £30 roadtax per year and have days out at weekends (without spending if we can!). The important thing for us is having quality time together as a family.
:money:Someone said on here a week or so ago "you don't have to spend money to have fun". How true.

Now the girls are out of nappies:j we have started saving that money for a rainy day.
We have PAYG phones, We have one tv, no microwave or tumble drier.We do the odd boot fair in the summer selling the girls old clothes to put towards school uniforms.
I have made some sacrifices. I sold my sports car and can't afford to go and watch the football every Saturday anymore but I'm over that.
My wife has to put up with me at weekends now:A. She has made good friends, she has met other school mums (difficult at first as we moved to a new area).
The girls have been brought up with each other and their mum which really is priceless.

wriggle

Many of you are writing that you are raising your children on a single wage but then adding you are in receipt of tax credits to supplement your income therefore clearly not managing on a single wage. Where do you think the tax credit money comes from? It comes from families with two working parents struggling themselves in most cases.

Nebulous2

Our oldest child is 26 and my wife has been in paid employment for about 2 and a half years since she was born.

When people tell you that they 'need' something, they are generally talking about lifestyle choices, not needs.

When I left school a relative said to me:- "I'm going to give you a piece of advice, it's not what you make that is important, it's what you do with it. One man will spend £120 a week on himself and the next will keep a wife and children and save on £80."

That remains as true today as it did then. You see people living the middle class dream, with the house, the two cars, the foreign holidays etc. They may also be paying what some people are living on for childcare. If they are pleased with their lifestyle then I am happy for them. If they are unhappy with it they wont convince me that they "have to" though. They are doing it because they have chosen to.

Nebulous2

wriggle wrote: »

Many of you are writing that you are raising your children on a single wage but then adding you are in receipt of tax credits to supplement your income therefore clearly not managing on a single wage. Where do you think the tax credit money comes from? It comes from families with two working parents struggling themselves in most cases.

The tax system actually penalises a family with one wage earner. A family with one earner on £30k will pay more tax than a family with two earners on £15k each.

quantic

Nebulous2 wrote: »

When I left school a relative said to me:- "I'm going to give you a piece of advice, it's not what you make that is important, it's what you do with it. One man will spend £120 a week on himself and the next will keep a wife and children and save on £80."

That remains as true today as it did then. You see people living the middle class dream, with the house, the two cars, the foreign holidays etc. They may also be paying what some people are living on for childcare. If they are pleased with their lifestyle then I am happy for them. If they are unhappy with it they wont convince me that they "have to" though. They are doing it because they have chosen to.

This is so true, I almost feel insulted when some of the people I know moan that they are struggling - when I know that their household income in literally more than twice ours and they are on interest only mortgages which cost half ours. I sometimes wonder if they heat their houses by burning pound notes.

usa1

Nebulous2 wrote: »

The tax system actually penalises a family with one wage earner. A family with one earner on £30k will pay more tax than a family with two earners on £15k each.

2 parents working have to pay work related expenses, travel, commuting charges , childcare fees, work clothes, and many other expenses that SAHMS don't pay. So yes, the tax system should support the 2 working parents model.

savier

thank you for your replies
it seems that indeed you CAN live with one salary

but we live in 2013 and in one of the richest economies in the world
and what one salary can offer is as far as I see well below the standard we should have

for example, is it luxury to have two laptops for the kids? to have seperate room for each? to have two cars? to get them to the gym? to buy them smartphones? to offer them holidays overseas?

these shouldn't be consider a luxury, but the standard, given where and in which era we live in