How can I inject some fun back into my life?

Tiglath

Thanks for the suggestions, guys - I actually spoke to my temporary line manager today who admitted she's feeling the same and a bit apprehensive about how it's all going to work out. We've agreed we'll be out the door by 6pm every day unless it's an absolutely dire emergency that can't wait till tomorrow. It's just part of the investment banking culture that you work long long hours, but I'm not prepared to sacrifice my health for it, so I'm going to ease back. I've never really learned the art of compartmentalising my life - I sometimes wake in the night and think about projects I'm responsible for. Unfortunately I'm a perfectionist with work (bet you didn't see that one coming!).

I used to have an allotment but had to give it up because of time and health reasons, although I could grow veg in the garden come Spring and it would probably be a good way to be out in the fresh air and do something physical. My passions are music and history so I'm going to take some Saturdays to just wander round the British Museum on my own. DH and I did that a couple of times earlier this year and really enjoyed it. I'll investigate City choirs. I'm also an avid reader and I think it's got to me that I've been too tired to do my customary reading before bed, so I will dust off the Pratchetts and just do some fun reading.

Thanks again.

marisco_2

I am glad to hear that you have a supportive line manager who understands where you are coming from, and who is working with you to find solutions to the pressures you are both under.

Easier said than done but try as hard as you can to not focus on work overnight. Things always seem far bigger and worse than they are in the small hours. As a fellow perfectionist I have been there and done that, only to feel completely unable to focus and be productive the next day due to over tiredness. Which is very frustrating as someone who likes to get things right and completed to a high standard. Vicious circle and all that!

I hope your work/life balance improves soon, and that you can start doing some of the things you use to enjoy that have fallen by the wayside a bit.

meritaten

If you are already working a 14 hour day - how the hell are you supposed to cover for your boss too? who I assume is working the same hours? there aren't 28 hours in the day! and you have to sleep sometime! this is not on!

meritaten

Tiglath - you are heading for burnout IMHO and your dreams are warning you. you KNOW that the work/life balance is out of synch.
the culture in which you work is rather unnatural isn't it? also you seem to have 'given up' leisure activities which you enjoy - because work is 'all-consuming', and its 'consuming' you. you know - I have never seen on anyones headstone - 'they should have spent more time at work'!

Rummer

I slowly built things I loved into my day when I realised that I was living my own personal Groundhog day. It started with little treats like a long bath with a good book, time to crochet, a TV show I liked and then I started to think about what I would like to do more often.

We are also partial to putting on some music and dancing round the living room

Time is a pressure for me as well but I make sure that I have time each day to do something I really enjoy. I went to some evening classes and some weekend ones to learn new skills and get out the house and they were great but if you don't have the time to attend classes you can learn new skills via you tube etc and find time for them at home.

Start small while you consider what best to do about your work situation and then plan big

Lara44

I feel a bit the same I have chosen work above all else for the past few years and life seems to be passing me by as I sit here glued to the laptop day in, day out. It's been months since I felt like I just had some fun, or cut loose. My project of 4 years ends on Wednesday next week and suddenly there will be room for things again. What will it be like? I feel like I have become a cardboard cut out version of myself with absolutely nothing to offer socially.

I've made a big list in anticipation and it's all really mundane things that make me happy, like going for posh gelato with my OH, going to get Christmas cheese from Borough market, going to a Christmas carol service at St. Paul's. Small things that are not too much pressure or commitment, but tiny luxuries. Wondering around the Museum sounds perfect. I hope you manage to get the balance right, it's a difficult one because if you enjoy work you also want to invest in it. I hate our long hours culture, I'm glad you had a positive chat with your manager.

Rummer

Tiglath wrote: »

I used to have an allotment but had to give it up because of time and health reasons, although I could grow veg in the garden come Spring and it would probably be a good way to be out in the fresh air and do something physical.

There is lots of interesting info on the Greenfingers board and plenty of people with the same interests. If you pop over there is a lovely group on the Daydreamers thread

AlexLK

Don't let work take over your life - it's far, far too short. The saying "find a job you love and you'll never have to work another day in your life" is true. However, can anybody love a job like yours?

I had a stressful career, ended up suffering "burn out" very early on. Work for myself doing various projects (only things I enjoy) and look after my son. Work wise my life has never been better - something for you to perhaps think about?

Tuesday_Tenor

A friend of mine who loves singing but can't comitt to a regular practice session had a great one-off Saturday workshop last spring doing Brahms Requiem 'from scratch' with the LSO at St. Luke's, Old Strett, London.

Looks like they have a couple of similar days coming up in Jan/Feb:
http://lso.co.uk/singing-day-haydn-the-creation

If it's not classical music you're interested in, I'm sure there are day workshops of different styles: my community choir has been to day workshops on Motown, gospel etc. over the years. You could try googling 'Natural Voice' or community choirs ....

HTH

Tiglath

Thanks Tuesday - I've done a few 'Messiah from scratch' type things with the Really Big Chorus and I'd love to do that again. I'll look into the LSO.