Kate's Journey

Madchickenlady

Sorry to read about your bend in the road but I'm glad to read that you have some solutions, what a nasty shock, I hate that horrible feeling of not being in control when something unexpected happens, hopefully you have sorted it now and it won't be as bad as you thought
I hope your leg is behavig itself too, I know a nasty break can cause problems for some time after the original accident but hopefully it will get sorted out soon

addicted2shopping

Hi Kate,

I just wanted to say hello, have been reading your diary in my lunch breaks at work over the last few days.

You are doing so well. Truely inspirational. There are always set backs and with planning as much as you are I am sure you will find a solution. Just keep trying and this will eventually all come together.

Just look to the future and know that things will never be as bad as they have once been.

Good Luck Kate. Keep up the good work.xx

Kate_fixing_it

Hello all! How are you all?

My weekend was AMAZING!!! I took my budget from the cashpoint before we left.i got back with £4.50 in my purse and snagged an NSD on Sunday

I arrived home to a spotless house, homemade pie for dinner and baking bread I'm not sure the children noticed I'd gone although I do think it was a good experience for hubby to step into my shoes.

On the marriage front all is good. He started the new job on Monday and he's like a new man but again that may be in part due to me leaving him to it all weekend. Whilst I'm the one in charge of school runs he's been doing a lot more in the evenings so far. The extra couple of hours in the evenings are making a huge difference to our lives. I knew it'd be a big change from shift work but I didn't anticipate this big or this positive a change.

It also turns out the bend in the road won't be so sharp. He WILL be paid from the new job at the end of Feb, obviously not a full month but anything is better than we expected.

As always, we are still human, there's a little cloud in the form of the first snow since my leg. It didn't seem like a little cloud yesterday when the pain had tears running down my face I'd also forgotten to return my painkillers to my handbag so had to tough it out. The silver lining was I point blank refused to go out for our team lunch so no spending at all (I didn't want to go anyway) and got through loads of work so I can relax next week when I'm on holiday

So aside from that blip life is on the up again Hubby is office based this week so no scary priced train fares to find, I've discovered that Aldi premium quarter pounders are much better than tesco finest (and a tenth of the price of a trip to burger king) and I'm feeling pretty damn amazing. I've even woken up pain free this morning although more wild weather is forecast so I'm enjoying this while it lasts.

I'm still plodding, still focused and unbelievably happy.

Kate x

Verbatim

Great tohear how positive you sound. I hope your leg is finally going to be "put right" soon. You are impressively resilient. I am in awe.:eek::eek:

beanielou

All sounding good

Madchickenlady

Despite your painful leg you still sound upbeat and positive, I hope the weather is kind to you and your leg stops playing up x

debtfreeoneday

Kate - you always sound so positive, glad that things between the two of you seem better and hey, life is full of twists and turns, its making sure they don't derail us is what is important. Just go with it and carry out with your journey. :-) x

Kate_fixing_it

I was just getting comfy to write an update as I got a notification!

Thank you all for your kind words and unwavering support.

It's been an "interesting" week to put it mildly! DH and I had a monumental screaming row which resulted in a night on the sofa and two days of silence. He's annoyed that I've not paid off more, I'm annoyed at his attitude. The end result was him demanding to see all statements immediately and me telling him I didn't need any more of a "telling off" (not the words I used ) and I didn't cause the situation alone, yelling at me wouldn't change it and that I'm not as perfect as him. I am sorry it happened but I can't change the past, only work towards a better future. If he can't support that there's no point carrying on.

Needless to say we're still on shaky ground but it gave me a lot to think about and a renewed sense of motivation. I DO want to make this marriage work. We've faced much worse than this. I've never actually faced up to him like this before (which is probably what caused so much animosity). What exactly was I ever afraid of? I can't control whether the marriage survives but I can control my contribution and efforts.

I didn't get the statements and I won't. I'm happy to provide regular balance updates but not if I'm going to be berated each time. I'm doing a bloody good job of tackling the debt, I'd like it cleared tomorrow too but that's not realistic. However slow the progress is at least it is progress.

Now onto happier things. Quidco paid out today £46 extra off a card so that's another £150 payment today I'm off work all week so I'm clearing out mine and the children's wardrobes for eBay and more debt-busting.

And the happiest news of all (in a way) I have my pre-op this Saturday! I'll hopefully get a surgery date. The light at the end of the leg tunnel is shining brightly I know I'm in for a lot of pain and at least 4 weeks recovery but that's 4 weeks of not going out spending, 4 weeks of no petrol costs and 4 weeks of increased debt destruction! If I'm feeling up to it, possibly a couple of weeks of uninterrupted study too.

All in all a roller coaster of a week but I've come out of it in one piece with renewed strength, renewed determination and a little less debt and that can't be bad

Kate x

in_need_of_direction

I'm curious, how early was his IVA paid off?

Kate_fixing_it

in_need_of_direction wrote: »

I'm curious, how early was his IVA paid off?

Exactly! We're just heading into the last few months of it. I was absolutely livid with his attitude. I've never said a word in relation to it, simply trusted him to tackle it. I only have a vague idea of how much it was. He may have been told to go forth and procreate during the argument.

And I've just noticed I said "we"! At the end of the day I'm doing the absolute best I can. The situation is what it is, we said "for richer, for poorer" and I believe I've stuck to my side of the bargain. I made mistakes and I'm fixing them and learning from them. I will not be punished any more, I've punished myself enough.

If nothing else the last week has forced me into growing a backbone and realising I'm not a naughty child. I'm a human being, I've made mistakes and I'll undoubtedly make more but I have faced my responsibilities and will not let go of this until it's done.

Kate x