New job and depression

TrickyWicky

Takeaway_Addict wrote: »

How was that a kick? It was pointing out a very obvious fact from the numerous posts you make, the large majority extremely negative.

You need to get some help and get a positive outlook in life again.

You're right. The snag is unlike most folks I have no-one to turn to for help. Most folks have plenty of friends, family, professional contacts, etc, I have nothing. Do I care? Not anymore I don't. If people like you wish to keep kicking a man when he's down then fine, I'll stay down and then you can kick me for that too!

When I've refused to be ground down and stayed employed or switched jobs, I've been the one treated like dirt purely because people sense that I have no security and can give me hell. Then the depression sets in and thats seen as a sin! Go figure!

Those in the weakest position will always get the rough ride. Thats a fact of life. I've had it from many employers. When the last two caused depressive problems they gave me hell for what they'd done. I was protected under the DDA for other physical health problems and that made things even worse too.

Takeaway_Addict

TrickyWicky wrote: »

You're right. The snag is unlike most folks I have no-one to turn to for help. Most folks have plenty of friends, family, professional contacts, etc, I have nothing. Do I care? Not anymore I don't. If people like you wish to keep kicking a man when he's down then fine, I'll stay down and then you can kick me for that too!

When I've refused to be ground down and stayed employed or switched jobs, I've been the one treated like dirt purely because people sense that I have no security and can give me hell. Then the depression sets in and thats seen as a sin! Go figure!

Those in the weakest position will always get the rough ride. Thats a fact of life. I've had it from many employers. When the last two caused depressive problems they gave me hell for what they'd done. I was protected under the DDA for other physical health problems and that made things even worse too.

Go see a Dr and stop blaming everyone else for your situation.

(P.s telling you that you have a very negative outlook on life which will hamper your chances of a job is not kicking you when you are down)

TrickyWicky

Takeaway_Addict wrote: »

Go see a Dr and stop blaming everyone else for your situation

No, you stop throwing the insults at me for other peoples actions!

If you can't handle the truth then thats your problem. It's a big world and there are many nasty people in it. If you can't handle that then it's not my problem!

@Op: Advice still stands, don't tell them a damned thing. I did that once and suffered hell for it. Started the job, filled in the medical questionaire on the first day and it went downhill from that point on - despite the fact I did everything and more than they asked. I worked my backside off, did as much overtime as they demanded (even when I'd made other arrangements) turned up at short notice when demanded, did things that they demanded which broke H&S and despite all my efforts they still made life hell at every opportunity. Stuff that!

Takeaway_Addict

TrickyWicky wrote: »

No, you stop throwing the insults at me for other peoples actions!

If you can't handle the truth then thats your problem. It's a big world and there are many nasty people in it. If you can't handle that then it's not my problem!

Whatever, I'm not the one blaming everyone else for my situation.

I've never denied there are nasty people in it but ultimately my place in life and my outlook is down to me.

I'm leaving this thread as it has derailed.

jacques_chirac

TrickyWicky wrote: »

Given that I've been kicked in the teeth many times in life, nearly lost my life a while back to a surgeon who will get away with it while I've lost £thousands in savings, income etc and been treated like !!!! by several bosses when I was deemed disabled, are you really surprised that I'm not the most upbeat of people?

Go on, kick someone in the teeth for having a rough ride. It's people like you who make people like me feel negative.

None of which is the problem or the fault of a prospective employer. If this is how you react to constructive feedback, how do you react in workplace situations?

Can you not see how the OP would be treated differently to you by most half reasonable employers? She puts across a positive can do attitude, something most employers would love irrespective of past health problems.

TrickyWicky

jacques_chirac wrote: »

None of which is the problem or the fault of a prospective employer.

It is when you're honest with them from the start and they decide to treat you like a liability when you're working harder and smarter than your colleagues - yes that IS the employers problem.

You are right though, a prospective employer who knows nothing about it can't be blamed for wrong doing. It's when they do know and they actively decide to treat you like dirt that they are at fault.

jacques_chirac wrote: »

If this is how you react to constructive feedback, how do you react in workplace situations?

I usually just take it and don't bother arguing it as I don't want to loose the job. I speak my mind here on the forum because it's annonymous. Thats how it works these days.

jacques_chirac wrote: »

Can you not see how the OP would be treated differently to you by most half reasonable employers?

You're forgetting something - they don't have the job yet and have been ordered to give notice at their current job. If this goes wrong for them then they're out of a job.

slenderkitten

I'm with tricky with this one, I too have had severe depression though I never took anti depressants I refused i just had counselling. I sold my stuff off and moved hundreds of miles away to get away from my problems as it was eating into my young life.

A lot of people have low mood or depression i doubt most people mention that they have this when they are already at work, unless they are fishing for time off work. Times are hard this lady wants to help herself NOT hinder her work prospects.

Op needs to evaluate and establish if they are fit for work, if they are DON'T mention it if you are not fit for work then you should not be in a job. Op says it did not affect their work if that's the case then why mention it, depression is not normally life threatening, if you had a physical problem that hinders your performance then that's different and must be declared.

I never declared my depression to any employer; unless i know i could not do the job or if my counsellor or doctor advised me not to do a job.

I would also like to highlight that you should NOT hand in your notice until you have had a formal job offer letter on their headed paper, in case they change their mind then you have something ironclad to help you.

Good luck

scooby088

TrickyWicky wrote: »

.

You're forgetting something - they don't have the job yet and have been ordered to give notice at their current job. If this goes wrong for them then they're out of a job.

This is what I am most concerned about, the OP was told to give in their notice, and as I stated earlier I wouldn't have done that until the offer was unconditional and in writing, there would be no way I would allow a future employer tell me when to hand in my notice.

jacques_chirac

slenderkitten wrote: »

I'm with tricky with this one, I too have had severe depression though I never took anti depressants I refused i just had counselling. I sold my stuff off and moved hundreds of miles away to get away from my problems as it was eating into my young life.

A lot of people have low mood or depression i doubt most people mention that they have this when they are already at work, unless they are fishing for time off work. Times are hard this lady wants to help herself NOT hinder her work prospects.

Op needs to evaluate and establish if they are fit for work, if they are DON'T mention it if you are not fit for work then you should not be in a job. Op says it did not affect their work if that's the case then why mention it, depression is not normally life threatening, if you had a physical problem that hinders your performance then that's different and must be declared.

I never declared my depression to any employer; unless i know i could not do the job or if my counsellor or doctor advised me not to do a job.

I would also like to highlight that you should NOT hand in your notice until you have had a formal job offer letter on their headed paper, in case they change their mind then you have something ironclad to help you.

Good luck

The OP has been asked the question directly. Would you rather recruit a person who has had a small mental health blip in the past, or an outright liar?

scooby088 wrote: »

This is what I am most concerned about, the OP was told to give in their notice, and as I stated earlier I wouldn't have done that until the offer was unconditional and in writing, there would be no way I would allow a future employer tell me when to hand in my notice.

Which should be the case with any change of job, but as the OP has already done so, it is too late to change that.

FBaby

It our silly to argue on the basis of risk vs no risk. OP is taking a risk of finding herself without job with whichever decision she makes. It's about damage limitation and her own approach a well as gut feeling from her initial contact with employer. Posters can only comment from their experience not do a risk assessment for op.