Counselling

tigershoes99

Sorry if this is in the wrong section,

But, has anyone been to counseling and can describe to me their experience and if they found it helpful?
My workplace have offered to pay towards sessions, and I would like to know a bit more about it.
I would probably be interesting in counseling for grief/anxiety/moving forward in life/life goals, that sort of thing?

Thanks!!

krustylouise

Hi,

I've been to counselling many times over the course of approximately 10years. Initially it was grief counselling after my mother passed away which then turne into anxiety and panic attacks, agoraphobia and I sought help for this also. Counselling only works as well as you wan it to. If you are fully committed to opening up and really finding answers and gain skills to cope with everyday situations then I think it is definitely worth it and would be the first route I advise anyone to go down, before meds or anything else.

Good luck and take care.

Mrs_pbradley936

The purpose of counselling is not to tell you what to do in order to solve your problems/issues. Rather it is to get you to acknowledge what the issues are and to explore how you might deal with them.

Sometimes there are no solutions to your issues and you might need help to arrive at that conclusion. Not by someone telling you there is nothing you can do but by encouraging you extend your thoughts in various directions to see what you are able to discover for yourself.

Some people that scoff at professional help can often get the benefits of counselling via a good friend and a glass of wine. Others may not want to discuss their private thoughts with people they know.

I wish you well whatever you decide.

Pinkdebster

I had a course of CBT to help me come to terms with a life-changing illness - I can honestly say it was one of the best things I ever did!! I think you have to go into it with an open mind and be prepared to work at it............good luck x

Bangton

I had it last year. Same sort of thing to you - my work paid for 6 sessions although I only used 4 of those on offer so am no expert.

For me, I found them quite gruelling. I don't know what I was expecting but it would take me days to get over a session. My reason for having them was due to severe anxiety (at that time ). I would have my hour session and often leave in tears. It certainly got worse before it got better!

On the whole though I would say it helped. It was never a case of him telling me what to do or even giving me advice..the method seemed to be to question me over and over again until I came to my own conclusion on moving forward. So, he might ask me why I felt a certain way over a situation and that would get me thinking and then I wouldn't have an answer or if I did it would be such a bizarre answer that I'd think what an earth is wrong with me thinking like that.

So it was almost through his questioning that I'd start to realise my thinking needed to improve.

I get bouts of anxiety now that sometimes take over me so I am certainly not cured after just 4 sessions but there are lots of small niggles that would previously really get to me that I can now blank through remembering my discussions with the counsellor.

HeadAboveWater

These:

krustylouise wrote: »

Counselling only works as well as you wan it to. If you are fully committed to opening up.

Mrs_pbradley936 wrote: »

The purpose of counselling is not to tell you what to do in order to solve your problems/issues. Rather it is to get you to acknowledge what the issues are and to explore how you might deal with them.

I got counselling (hypnotherapy) a couple of years back when I went off work with WRS. As far as I was aware, that was the only thing bugging me. But throughout the sessions I dealt with a whole load of other stuff that I had buried at the back of my mind. It really, really helped me and I would definitely recommend it.

Raksha

Counselling isnt always appropriate treatment for some conditions, such as Borderline Personality Disorder.

heartbreak_star

It can help bring them out into the open and help the person acknowledge it though.

HBS x

Nenen

Mrs_pbradley936 wrote: »

Some people that scoff at professional help can often get the benefits of counselling via a good friend and a glass of wine. Others may not want to discuss their private thoughts with people they know.

I wish you well whatever you decide.

I agree with much of your post Mrs pbradley but I have some reservations about the statement you made that I've quoted above.

A few people might be lucky enough to have a friend they trust enough to listen to them carefully without making judgements or trying to impose solutions and (most importantly of all in my opinion) keep all the information discussed completely confidential. However, in my experience, friends (with the best of intentions) don't always give us enough time and space to listen or let us express our emotions as they are often so eager to try and find solutions for us and/or make us feel better in the short term.

It can also be difficult to completely offload on a friend as we are often worried about what they will think of us if we reveal everything we are thinking/feeling or we are afraid of burdening friends with our problems. We can also get into emotional tangles with friends and end up feeling beholden to them.

A trained professional is able to remain impartial and will never be shocked or judgemental about what is revealed in a counselling session. S/he can provide a safe place for the client to express all their fears, anger, sadness etc and work through these. I have to admit I am rather biased as my husband is a psychotherapist, but I do believe that counselling or psychotherapy can provide a safe haven for people with emotional problems as well as an opportunity to develop much greater insight into our own psyche.

As far as the OP is concerned, I guess if your work is offering to pay for the counselling they either have someone in-house or will help you find someone who is properly trained and registered. This is very important because, at the moment, anyone in the UK can set themselves up as a counsellor or psychotherapist with little or no training and these people can do a lot more harm than good.

The following links are to the main professional associations for organisations who train and register counsellors and psychotherapists. They give lots more information about counselling and therapy and provide names of properly trained and registered counsellors and psychotherapists who abide by a code of ethics:

http://www.psychoanalytic-council.org/bpc-council-institutions
http://www.bacp.co.uk/

I do hope this helps - being at peace with ourselves is one of the greatest things we can achieve and, in my experience, counselling or psychotherapy can help you find this.

Mrs_pbradley936

Nenen wrote: »

I agree with much of your post Mrs pbradley but I have some reservations about the statement you made that I've quoted above.

A few people might be lucky enough to have a friend they trust enough to listen to them carefully without making judgements or trying to impose solutions and (most importantly of all in my opinion) keep all the information discussed completely confidential. However, in my experience, friends (with the best of intentions) don't always give us enough time and space to listen or let us express our emotions as they are often so eager to try and find solutions for us and/or make us feel better in the short term.

It can also be difficult to completely offload on a friend as we are often worried about what they will think of us if we reveal everything we are thinking/feeling or we are afraid of burdening friends with our problems. We can also get into emotional tangles with friends and end up feeling beholden to them.

A trained professional is able to remain impartial and will never be shocked or judgemental about what is revealed in a counselling session. S/he can provide a safe place for the client to express all their fears, anger, sadness etc and work through these. I have to admit I am rather biased as my husband is a psychotherapist, but I do believe that counselling or psychotherapy can provide a safe haven for people with emotional problems as well as an opportunity to develop much greater insight into our own psyche.

As far as the OP is concerned, I guess if your work is offering to pay for the counselling they either have someone in-house or will help you find someone who is properly trained and registered. This is very important because, at the moment, anyone in the UK can set themselves up as a counsellor or psychotherapist with little or no training and these people can do a lot more harm than good.

The following links are to the main professional associations for organisations who train and register counsellors and psychotherapists. They give lots more information about counselling and therapy and provide names of properly trained and registered counsellors and psychotherapists who abide by a code of ethics:

http://www.psychoanalytic-council.org/bpc-council-institutions
http://www.bacp.co.uk/

I do hope this helps - being at peace with ourselves is one of the greatest things we can achieve and, in my experience, counselling or psychotherapy can help you find this.

I take your point and am not offended. However I know that with some people if you mentioned that you were considering counselling they would do their best to put you off. Either by telling you not to waste your money (not an issue here I know) OR because they think that you are unstable and acknowledging this is the first step towards a breakdown. Their solution being a glass of wine and a chat with the girls because we all have our problems and you do not need a shrink.

I suppose it all depends upon the people we have dealt with over the years.

tigershoes99

Thank you for all your replies x