Protecting my inheritance

Seanymph

*It's not just women who see marriage as a meal ticket. Just saying.

Mojisola

kboss2010 wrote: »

Why should being married entitle you to your OH's money? It's one of the reasons I don't want to get married but if my bf and I buy a property, for example, and I paid the full deposit, I'd expect that if we ever sold that I would get my whole deposit back not just half because we both lived there!

That opinion wouldn't change if we got married.

Because the vows taken in a CofE wedding (which used to be the majority of weddings) include the words "and all that I have I share with you".

The state also works on the basis that all financial possessions of a married couple belong to both of them.

FBaby

At the same time, maybe he supported her 100% during their marriage and he didn't complain about it. There seem to be a lot of 'what yours is mine and what's mine is mine' in some relationship and it's not surprising that things go wrong with that attitude.

Tropez

Mojisola wrote: »

Because the vows taken in a CofE wedding (which used to be the majority of weddings) include the words "and all that I have I share with you".

The state also works on the basis that all financial possessions of a married couple belong to both of them.

I think this is why prenuptial (and even postnuptial) agreements should be given a more official legal standing in the UK as I don't believe that the state can truly decide anything when it comes to people's romantic relationships. As is evidenced every week on this forum, all sorts of people live all sorts of lives and lifestyles and what is suitable for one couple could be wholly unsuitable for another.

Of course, people would also need to start reconciling with the fact that a prenup is not a "doomed to fail" agreement but something as logical as taking out protection against all sorts of things that statistically are much less likely to happen to a married couple than a divorce.

kboss2010

maman wrote: »

Sadly, while you might expect it, the courts might decide otherwise.

I know, that's why I'm not getting married

itsanne

I may be wrong, but isn't an inheritance exempt from the "shared" assets in a marriage? Don't remember where I came across this, so it might not be correct.

Edited to add I'm in Scotland. I don't remember if the above applied to Scotland or the rest of the UK.

kboss2010

maman wrote: »

Totally agree.

We often get threads about how couples handle money and I hate all this communal pot idea. Too many women see men as a meal ticket IMO.

It frustrates me so much! I've seen so many women standing in front of me in the queue at the bank/in shops angrily declaring that it's ridiculous they cannot withdraw/spend money using their husband's card just because hubby allows them to go shopping with it. Only one of these women had an excuse not to know better (she was from a country where that is the norm).

Joint accounts for bills and food only work ok in my experience. But completely pooling all your pay is just asking for arguments.

tyllwyd

This gives some general background
http://www.mayowynnebaxter.co.uk/blog/the-treatment-of-inheritance-on-divorce/

Torry_Quine

maman wrote: »

Totally agree.

We often get threads about how couples handle money and I hate all this communal pot idea. Too many women see men as a meal ticket IMO.

It can work both ways.

To me though once married there is no mine and yours but ours.

POPPYOSCAR

Torry_Quine wrote: »

It can work both ways.

To me though once married there is no mine and yours but ours.

We are not married but we are a couple and there is no mine and yours, just ours for us.