Bit of Advice

DeeDee74

gboom2000 wrote: »

I agree that I probably have had a good deal with money over the years, I suppose that's the thing when Kids have Kids, we were 16 at the time and nothing was done right due to our age so I never set up a regular payment. Heck, I doubt there'd have been much of a payment up until I was 23 when I finally had a real payment, but I was always there for my kid.
I think you're taking a view that all Dads in this situation are useless from your own situation with your kids and ex(just a stab in the dark there, but why else would you be so interested in this?)? I see my Daughter every weekend and holidays, I buy clothes without being asked to and give her money for her school dinners without being asked, I am not a deadbeat Dad who doesn't see his kids and doesn't want to pay for them. I'm actually upset that I've had an argument with her Mum as we've been friends for so long but that has happened now and I need to do things right now so it doesn't cost me and my family more money in the long run. The past is in the past and there is nothing I can do to change that.

I like your honesty , thats the point I was making though your really payed very little over 13 years I can see the pwc annoyance. , Surley it would be easyer to use the csa carculator and see the min you would have to pay and offer this in cash monthly to your ex?

Seeing your child isent the same as supporting them financially, kids are expensive. . If you are worried about the fall out with your ex and wish to avoid involving csa and or more arguements id offer regular payments. Thats the fair and right thing to do.

gboom2000

DeeDee74 wrote: »

I like your honesty , thats the point I was making though your really payed very little over 13 years I can see the pwc annoyance. , Surley it would be easyer to use the csa carculator and see the min you would have to pay and offer this in cash monthly to your ex?

Seeing your child isent the same as supporting them financially, kids are expensive. . If you are worried about the fall out with your ex and wish to avoid involving csa and or more arguements id offer regular payments. Thats the fair and right thing to do.

I have offered to pay weekly the rate that CSA calculator has said, regardless of my ex's decision to go to the CSA or not, and she will not give me the bank details in which to pay, that's the stumbling block.

DeeDee74

gboom2000 wrote: »

I have offered to pay weekly the rate that CSA calculator has said, regardless of my ex's decision to go to the CSA or not, and she will not give me the bank details in which to pay, that's the stumbling block.

Can you not write her a cheque? I know some people would said its a bad idea but I cant see why it would be a problem if you havent payed constant tor 13 years is she going to approach csa and say shes had no money at all??

tattycath

gboom2000 wrote: »

I have offered to pay weekly the rate that CSA calculator has said, regardless of my ex's decision to go to the CSA or not, and she will not give me the bank details in which to pay, that's the stumbling block.

Personally, I would put the relevant money aside periodically until she gives you her bank details.
If she asks for any money in the mean time tell her as soon s you receive her bank details she'll get regular payments.
As an aside I would only make the payments to her bank account. I knew of someone who was given the child's account number and pwc said it was pocket money/part loan repayment and the nrp had to pay again.