Mr and Mrs K's New Journey to a Debt Free Life.

AlexLK

LannieDuck wrote: »

lol, thank you

And I never did either. But I think not having to worry about the cost of the things you want is a huge luxury. And one you don't realise you have until it's gone.

Well put like that, yes it is.

maddiemay wrote: »

Alex, you have the full range of support here, from gentle chiding and encouragement to full scale kick up the rear:rotfl:

I seem to be on the receiving end of the latter rather often.

maddiemay wrote: »

You have come such a long way, in so many areas, since you started this diary, and you will continue to make progress, but it may seem slower than you would like and much more difficult at times, just hang on in there, baby steps is fine, so is just treading water sometimes.:)

Thank you. I've been disappointed in myself recently for not making a large dent in the debt for a couple of weeks.

maddiemay wrote: »

Don't know anything regarding being self-employed, but if the ink and paper is for reports for the music teaching, can you save the receipt /ask for one when back in the shop, and put this down as a business expense?

I hope too, that you can continue to improve/keep the black dog in check, can you build even a tiny bit of exercise and fresh air into your day, it does seem to help a lot of people. Even a bit of jogging on the spot outside while the kettle boils or something would be a plus.

I could do. However, I'm sure I will use the ink and paper other times also.

No exercise at the moment, I am still short of breath and generally quite ill. Mrs. K. has gone to her brother's this afternoon with our son to give me some time alone which I didn't want but she insisted on.

maddiemay wrote: »

So pleased that little K is enjoying his new horizons too.

Finally, (you will be pleased about this:rotfl:) on one diary I read the lady writer, always finishes with three things that she has been grateful for each day. When I was going through a very bad time a few years ago, while driving to work each day (on my own) I used to say aloud all the things that I found good around me, listing by name my lovely family and friends my dogs, the wild flowers and berries I could see, the lambs in the fields I drove by etc, etc.

So am I. When we first took him to this particular nursery, I wanted to send him to a "better" one but wouldn't dream of that now as he loves it. I think the messing about there has actually done a lot of good, he's got lots of new friends too.

That's a good tip. Is that one of your dogs in the photo? I grew up with dogs and would love to get one for our son but of course, dogs cost money.

LannieDuck

AlexLK wrote: »

Thank you. I've been disappointed in myself recently for not making a large dent in the debt for a couple of weeks.

You've been ill, my dear. Give yourself a bit of a break from the self-chastisement.

maddiemay

Yes, that is our current canine house mate, she is besotted by my OH, but I am considered good enough to play ball with and dry her when she is wet!! Over the last 30+ years we have adopted a succession of beautiful and fun dogs, all needed new homes for various reasons. This one (my user name) will probably be our last as we are starting to "get on a bit":eek:

Yes, to expensive and yes to huge commitment, but amazing to share one's life with too.

heartbreak_star

AlexLK wrote: »

I grew up with dogs and would love to get one for our son but of course, dogs cost money.

So glad to hear nursery is doing good by Lil K

Maybe a dog is a plan for when he's a little older (can help look after it ) and you're feeling more stable financially.

I would say when you do come round to it...please rescue a dog. So many need good homes. We have a little rescue sprollie and she's mad but wonderful

HBS x

AlexLK

LannieDuck wrote: »

You've been ill, my dear. Give yourself a bit of a break from the self-chastisement.

I shall do my best. I suppose a lot of the time the negative thoughts are already there in my head before I can even see a positive.

maddiemay wrote: »

Yes, that is our current canine house mate, she is besotted by my OH, but I am considered good enough to play ball with and dry her when she is wet!! Over the last 30+ years we have adopted a succession of beautiful and fun dogs, all needed new homes for various reasons. This one (my user name) will probably be our last as we are starting to "get on a bit":eek:

Yes, to expensive and yes to huge commitment, but amazing to share one's life with too.

She sounds great. My parents last dog died when my son was about 6 months old and they decided against another because father has become not so quick on his feet recently.

I must admit I do want our son to grow up with a dog in the family for various reasons. Recently, he has really started to take an interest in animals, particularly next door's sheep but he is not getting one of those!

Mara_uk7

Ah go on, get him a lamb ... Once its 6 months old you can curry it !

AlexLK

heartbreak_star wrote: »

So glad to hear nursery is doing good by Lil K

Maybe a dog is a plan for when he's a little older (can help look after it ) and you're feeling more stable financially.

I would say when you do come round to it...please rescue a dog. So many need good homes. We have a little rescue sprollie and she's mad but wonderful

HBS x

He loves it and I'm very jealous of their wonderful meals :rotfl:.

Yes, we were thinking in around a year - 18 months away realistically.

Not sure about a rescue dog, only for the reason I am not really an experienced dog handler, never trained my parent's dogs and I am quite aware a rescue dog can present their own challenges. Mrs. K. is hard pushed to be persuaded in the first place, so any dog would ultimately be my responsibility.

AlexLK

Mara_uk7 wrote: »

Ah go on, get him a lamb ... Once its 6 months old you can curry it !

You cruel, cruel lady. Son would be devastated. :rotfl:

heartbreak_star

AlexLK wrote: »

He loves it and I'm very jealous of their wonderful meals :rotfl:.

Yes, we were thinking in around a year - 18 months away realistically.

Not sure about a rescue dog, only for the reason I am not really an experienced dog handler, never trained my parent's dogs and I am quite aware a rescue dog can present their own challenges. Mrs. K. is hard pushed to be persuaded in the first place, so any dog would ultimately be my responsibility.

Understood - but do ask at shelters. Any animal can be unpredictable around children, and lots of folks seem to assume all rescues have been mistreated. It's not true - some have just had bad luck of families moving to places that don't allow pets and the like. The staff will know which ones are OK for families.

All kids should grow up with dogs IMO. They are awesome.

HBS x

FlacosFloozie

Hi Alex,

I've been lurking and dipping in and out of your diary for a bit now. You do seem to have come in for quite a lot of tough love lately and, while well meant, I think it seems to be getting a bit much for you at times and that has made me think I should actually post and support you.

Firstly, well done on the progress you have made. You are off to a brilliant start! Don't you dare beat yourself up for not doing more yet, be pleased with what you have acheived so far.

Secondly, adjusting your living expenses takes time. Before my light bulb moment I could easily spend £500 a month in the supermarket for the two of us. Now I manage happily with £200 but it was a gradual reduction, I couldn't have done it overnight. You've tightened your belt- it feels akward and unforfortable but in a few months it will feel easier and you'll be able to tighten it a little further relatively painlessly.

Thirdly, and this is the biggie, take time and think about what you really want out of life and if that is different to what you think is expected. Did you buy the nice ink and paper because you will get pleasure from it or because you feel it will give other people a certain impression?

Like you I'm a child of middle class parents who did well. I assumed I would follow their path and do the same, but the world has changed. It took time to realise that me and my friends will not do quite as well as our parents' generation did and that this is okay . I don't begrude my parents anything but my upbringing did not prepare me for the realities of a financially harsher climate. I have learned to meal plan, budget and not just pick what I fancy in the supermarket. I will not be able to send any kids to private schools, but, if I save, I may be able to help them through university. I can't afford a fortnight in the sunshine but I can manage a weekend in a cottge. It took time to adjust my expectations of life but I'm far happier. I wonder if part of the reason its difficult to let go of the pens is that they represent the life you feel you should have?

Anyway, this is far longer and more rambling than I intended but take care of yourself and be proud of what you are doing for your family's future.