Prenuptial agreement & divorce

Jenny321

Hi,


My boyfriend has recently asked me for a prenup before we get married because he has quite a few assets (a couple of big houses) and I have none.

I'm wondering, how can i compare anything we agree to with what a court might decide? E.g. if we get married and split up for any reason, with no children, I would assume i'm not entitled to half his assets - or am I?

We have no dependents

Thanks, all very confusing

HappyMJ

Jenny321 wrote: »

Hi,


My boyfriend has recently asked me for a prenup before we get married because he has quite a few assets (a couple of big houses) and I have none.

I'm wondering, how can i compare anything we agree to with what a court might decide? E.g. if we get married and split up for any reason, with no children, I would assume i'm not entitled to half his assets - or am I?

We have no dependents

Thanks, all very confusing

If you have a pre-nuptial it's an informal agreement in the event of a divorce that is what you have agreed to. You both need to be very open about what each of you have and what debts you have. However, in any case he can't leave you destitute. You would be at a minimum entitled to half of any increase in the value of his assets. Personally, I'd get the houses valued near to the date of your marriage and if you get a divorce get them valued again. Any difference in value he pays you half....but no less than enough to get you by at the same standard of living during your marriage for at least the same period of your marriage after you get a divorce. i.e if you're married for 5 years then he gives you enough to live the same lifestye for another 5 years. You need a solicitor to get the wording right.

74jax

We downloaded forms free off the internet and completed ourselves. We added the clause once we'd been married 10 years the prenup was disolved.

Its worth noting that UK doesn't recognise them legally, but will take them as a basis on what you agreed prior to getting married.

You also need it witnessed - I used my boss and OH used a work friend.

I posted on here before our wedding got slated (and that's putting it mildly) for even considering one, but our assets were so hugely different it really made sence to us and that's all that matters.

Tiddlywinks

Always good to start a marriage (which should be a commitment that people make with the intention that it will last forever) with the thought that it may not work.

I know that it is the same as an insurance policy - you hope you'll never need it BUT why is he asking really? Is there a chance he doesn't really feel this is a 'forever' relationship?

Kynthia

Get legal advice as you need someone knowledgeable on your side and ensure you're being treated fairly.

Errata

Pre nups have no legal standing but they do indicate to a divorce judge which way both partners would like the wind to blow.

mgdavid

Errata wrote: »

Pre nups have no legal standing but they do indicate to a divorce judge which way both partners would like the wind to blow.

can you quote a source for that statement please?

Netwizard

Tiddlywinks wrote: »

I know that it is the same as an insurance policy - you hope you'll never need it BUT why is he asking really? Is there a chance he doesn't really feel this is a 'forever' relationship?

I have seen so many people that truly love each other, get married, only for it to go belly up.

Personally, I'm 30 next year, own my own house, car is paid off, and I don't have any debts.

The thought of a woman coming into my life, and taking half of that and leaving me for broke scares the hell out of me because I have seen it happy to so many others.

marisco_2

Tiddlywinks wrote: »

Always good to start a marriage (which should be a commitment that people make with the intention that it will last forever) with the thought that it may not work.

I know that it is the same as an insurance policy - you hope you'll never need it BUT why is he asking really? Is there a chance he doesn't really feel this is a 'forever' relationship?

It could well be that this guy has been let down in past relationships and been taken to the cleaners by ex's. When this happens it makes you remove your rose tinted glasses, and you become very cautious about guarding the assets you have possibly spent years accumulating. Someone showing a natural desire to not lose everything on the off chance that a relationship fails, is no indication of how much they love their partner or their level of commitment to them. It is just showing common sense.

neneromanova

mgdavid wrote: »

can you quote a source for that statement please?

http://www.prenups.uk.com/site/summary-of-the-current-law

74jax

mgdavid wrote: »

can you quote a source for that statement please?

We took legal advice and were told this by our (uk) solicitor.

A court will use them as a basis of what we 'initially' wanted to happen though.

I think they have a legal standing in America, just not here.

I did ours because OH really wanted one I was in-different, if it made him feel safer then so be it. His inheritance was substantial and although inheritance is not normally taken into account if divorce happens it still made him feel happier.

The properties we both own had to be listed, together with current day market value etc.

Splitting everything 50/50 in our case was wildly incorrect, more like 90/10. So I totally see where he was coming from.

His parents divorced and I honestly thought we'd never get married, after 8 years I was still unsure, but married we are - only we both have a copy of a prenup should we need it.