Counselling

Frith

I have a counselling qualification. I have also had 2 years of therapy from psychiatrists and 1 year from a psych nurse.

The year from the psych nurse was CBT based (supposed to be a 6 week course but was extended to 25 sessions for me!) It was much more helpful than the years spent with the psychiatrists.

As others have said, especially if CBT based, you DO have to put the work in. There are many different tools they might use, from diaries, to mood charts and I decided at the start that, whatever my task for that week, I would do it slavishly with no excuses.

It is awkward talking to professionals about upsetting things (I bottle everything up in normal life) but I told her at the start that everything would make me cry (which it did) and then I just had to get on with it.

It helped immensely that my psych nurse was a down to earth Brummie! I don't think a wishy washy person would have suited me.

Hermia

Edwardia wrote: »

Dunroamin, the counsellor who did my assessment did tell me that counselling doesn't work for everyone.

I think part of that is that there are so many approaches. In the place where I had counselling one of the other counsellors based his techniques on Jungian analysis. My counsellor told me some people really took to it and some just walked out!

Edwardia wrote: »

I'm OK with talking about the generalities of my situation but I'm sure I will have difficulty expressing how I feel about it. It's that bottled-up anger, frustration and stress that I need to deal with though.

I wonder whether something more CBT focused would help? Do you just want some practical techniques to deal with your issues in the here and now or do you want to delve into your past?

Racheldevon

I have experienced counselling, and am a trained clinical supervisor. I think it's a really positive step that you've clearly put thought into. As with anything there are therapist you'll click with and others who maybe aren't the right person for you. Be prepared to give it several sessions whilst you build rapport with your therapist and decide whether this is someone you want to continue to work with, or whether you'd like to try another therapist in the charity - this is usually explained during the initial first session with your counsellor - he/she certainly would be used to this, it's not uncommon. Also, don't panic about 'unravelling' as such, you're therapist will work with you at a pace that is right for you. CBT is very solution focused, it can be really well delivered, but in my experience many people are doing very short CPD workshops and then calling themselves CBT therapists, and this is dangerous. On the other hand plenty have trained through rigorous routes like IAPT for low & high intensity workers. You can't really anticipate in advance which therapeutic approach will work for you, a huge amount depends on the relationship you develop with your therapists, and many will draw on a integrative approach from several different approaches to best meet your needs - good luck

paulineb_2

It very much depends on the counsellor, Ive had counselling that I stopped because it made me feel worse, I really didnt want to sit and tick sheets that said, are you depressed?

I also had counselling fairly recently to do with a work situation (story of my life) and it was ok but she said we were going to do some CBT, thats not really what happened, I spent 6 weeks talking, she listened, dunno, I felt that in the end I was fed up with talking.

Ive never had CBT but I touched on it when I did a post grad in addictions and I believe it can be very effective. Theres quite a lot of free resources online about CBT as well.

Yorkie1

As others have said, different approaches suit different people and don't think it's not for you at all if you're not happy with the first approach.

I also think that sometimes it is worth doing counselling in stages, in that you're sometimes only ready to deal with certain things at certain points in your life. It can take time to assimilate one lot before moving on to the next when you feel the prompt to do so.

Edwardia

I had a call on Friday to say that a counsellor had been assigne to me and would be making contact next week so I guess I just have to wait and see what happens next and keep an open mind.

dancingfairy

Sometimes a bit of space and time to get things off your chest helps. Sometimes someone outside the situation who can suggest different ways of seeing the situation (so you can see whether your 'take' on the situation is helpful to you).
Also you may want to explore different strategies to either manage the situation and how you can put boundaries up or how you can cope better.
What I personally don't think is terribly helpful is delving into the past too much to understand why you are the way you are (unless you can then move on from that and view things in a more useful/better way in future).
I also think different counsellors/different approaches work for different people/maybe even for the same person at different times in their life so don't give up if the first person/experience isn't quite what you were hoping for.
Best of Luck
df

Wellyboots6

Answering your question of what to expect...

Don't be put off if your first session is mainly 'housekeeping'. I am a counsellor working for a charity and more and more now we are having to get clients to sign certain things, answer questionnaires etc before we actually start work on the reason they are there.

I do find it quite frustrating, as someone who has taken the step to see a counsellor often wants to get stuck in straight away, and gets put off by all the paperwork we now have. Give it chance though!

As others have said too, if you feel the counsellor isn't right for you, or the approach isn't right, then say. We are very used to people wanting to try someone new or a different approach and don't at all get offended by it. Similarly if the counsellor suggests someone else may be more useful to you too, don't worry.

If it is a time-limited service (the service I work for only offers clients 6 sessions at a time, which often isn't enough), then I would say have a think about the issues you want to work on, things you want to discuss etc and even make bullet points to give to the counsellor so you can make best use of your time with them. We are expected to draw up action plans with clients, but it can be difficult for the client to pick things out of the blue that they want to work on, and so having a think in advance would be useful.

Also, you may find your counsellor doesn't use a particular approach as such, or they may stick very much to one model of working. I base my approach on what I am working on with the client, how they work best, things they have tried before etc so it can often be a mish-mash of various techniques. I may work with one client in a totally different way to how I would work with another client.

mountainofdebt

Edwardia wrote: »

Dunroamin, the counsellor who did my assessment did tell me that counselling doesn't work for everyone. I really don't know whether it will work for me, I haven't ever had to sit in front of a stranger before and tell him/her how I feel.

S.

I've highlighted the bit that I disagree with totally.

A good counsellor won't ask you to tell them how you feel but ask you a series of questions. They are just asking the right questions to get you to analyise the situation yourself

kiss_me_now9

Tried it twice, hated it both times. Granted, it was through my universities service, and was limited to 8 hour long sessions, but every session was hell.

The first time the counsellor only wanted to focus on one small event in my life which I find incredibly hard to talk about even though it happened 10 years ago. Every single session was her asking me about it and me sitting in silence because if I didn't, I'd break down in tears and have a panic attack.

The second time, a different counsellor, she was convinced that my troubles with uni work stemmed from procrastination and bad study methods rather than being depressed as I have been for 7 years and so we spent the entire time talking about how to study more effectively.

I would like to try CBT or DBT - but to be honest, I just don't have the mental strength or energy to think about it or accessing it.