Is it legal to record telephone calls with a minor (although your own child)??

thorsoak

Play him at his own game (without him realising it, of course!) On the days that he will be calling, use your phone, to video what the childen are doing - and video them eating their tea etc etc - make a game of it - "oh here we are at the park/playing with bubbles/drawing pictures" etc etc etc ..."it's teatime, we've got fish fingers today" etc etc etc.

So if he does try to use his recordings, you can countermand them with your video recordings - and if they aren't necessary then in the future you will have some lovely memories!

RAS

can you pm neverdespairgirl SD?

fashionlover10

I don't have any advice for you OP but I just wanted to say I think your kids are great for being able to even talk to their dad on the phone at their age. My cousin is nearly 9 and when she stays here her mum will call to check she's ok. I always ask her if she wants to talk to her mum and she refuses every time, it's like she has a hatred of the phone!

Oh and kids are ALWAYS hungry apparently. The first thing my cousin says upon walking in the door is 'I'm hungry' even if she's just had a huge meal. She still has to be prompted when asked what she's done during the day too.

rozmister

thorsoak wrote: »

Play him at his own game (without him realising it, of course!) On the days that he will be calling, use your phone, to video what the childen are doing - and video them eating their tea etc etc - make a game of it - "oh here we are at the park/playing with bubbles/drawing pictures" etc etc etc ..."it's teatime, we've got fish fingers today" etc etc etc.

So if he does try to use his recordings, you can countermand them with your video recordings - and if they aren't necessary then in the future you will have some lovely memories!

I know what you mean by having evidence to show he's wrong but I think filming them is a bit far. I prefer minimoneysavers suggestion of a diary with photos and ticket stubs.

I just don't feel comfortable with one parent recording them on the phone, the other filming them all the time in case the parent with the phone recordings makes allegations, when do the kids just get to be child unrecorded and relaxed? A photos a lot less intrusive and just as good and you'd take them anyway to treasure the moment. If both parents are trying to record the moment to trip each other up then it ends up with neither parent enjoying the moment and enjoying their children. And I know Dad sounds like he already has reached that stage but it doesn't mean Mum has to stoop to his level.

Frith

My ex used to do this when I called my sons when they were at his house for the weekend. When he stopped recording (I think he worked out we never said anything fascinating to each other!) he would still put my calls on speakerphone and listen in. He did that for about 4 years...

I did ask my solicitor at the time what she thought about it and she was very vague.

As a pp poster said, probably a good idea to keep a diary of where you have taken them, appointments etc just in case. All children say they have done "nothing" and had "nothing for tea" if you ask them, I think!

SunshineButterfly

I refuse to record, video or take pictures of my children (other than the normal of course that normal parents do). As when I was reported to SS every month for a year every time the children went to their fathers he would photograph every bruise, mark, scratch on their bodies. This included pictures of private parts that were then showed to every tom, !!!! and harry in court proceedings.

He still does it now if they have a particularly large bruise. Therefore I am not willing to do anything simular as I feel it will damage my children being used in that way. They need a sense of privacy and identity.

RAS

SHeesh SB - he really is completely fixated, is he not. And unable to address the needs of his children rather than his ego.

How much longer are you at Uni?

Have you considered moving away from the area when you finish; then he might lose interest over time. I apppreciate that also means moving away from uni friends and support.

I really hope he meet another woman and decides to leave all three of you alone. Pity her mind you.

rozmister

SunshineButterfly wrote: »

I refuse to record, video or take pictures of my children (other than the normal of course that normal parents do). As when I was reported to SS every month for a year every time the children went to their fathers he would photograph every bruise, mark, scratch on their bodies. This included pictures of private parts that were then showed to every tom, !!!! and harry in court proceedings.

He still does it now if they have a particularly large bruise. Therefore I am not willing to do anything simular as I feel it will damage my children being used in that way. They need a sense of privacy and identity.

Jesus that's truly horrific. I'm sorry but taking photos of a child like that to me without an extremely good reason is so invasive it's practically abuse. I know they don't understand or particularly care about keeping their bodies private but they will care if they find out when they're older. I don't know how you cope with someone like that, I take my hat off to you.

SunshineButterfly

I don't want to put too much details on here but he IS with another woman and has a baby due. Yet I still haven't gotten much peace from it all.

I am at uni for another couple of years, though wouldn't move away as then I will have to travel further for his contact plus I do not think it would be good for the children to be changing schools again anytime soon.

RAS

In hope SB.

Why are you travelling for his contact. he should be travelling unless there is a court order otherwise?