Residency order - legal help needed???

shell_girl

Try calling the Rights of Women helpline, hopefully they'll be able to offer you some advice

http://www.rightsofwomen.org.uk/index.php

Ms_Chocaholic

I'm unsure why you are applying for a Residence Order. Have you submitted the form to the Court/paid the fee? I'm not sure what you will gain by having a RO, this will not force your ex to see his daughter, nothing will.

hueygeorge wrote: »

I was hoping that the judge would say 'Well you have to see her every Sat' or whenever. I ultimately want her to know who her Dad is but think I have gone about it the wrong way - arrgghhh!!

The Judge can only grant a Contact Order if an application is made for a Contact Order, and you are applying for a RO. Even when a Contact Order is granted, a Judge can't force someone to have contact with a child. Say the Contact Order said alternate weekends and every Wednesday evening, if the person who has been granted the Contact Order never wants to turn up for that, there's nothing the Judge can do about it.


If he wants to see his daughter, he needs to apply to the Court for a Contact Order which will cost him £215. He will not get legal aid and will have to represent himself in Court - do you think that is likely?

If it were me and with the circumstances you have explained, I would let sleeping dogs lie and wait to hear from him/his solicitor. He sounds like he is all talk no action and has probably not looked into the implications of it all.

hueygeorge

Hi All
I am applying for the RO as I have been told that if the ex tries to 'snatch' our daughter, the Police won't act as he has PR. I do want him to have a relationship with her but......
Basically, I just want her to live with me - I'm not an alcoholic or a drug user - and I can offer her a stable, loving environment. I also don't want the fact that he could possible take me to court at anytime for custody and I would lose her hanging over my head, its too much stress. Like I have said, I would like him to have a relationship with her but under supervised access only.
Can i retract a RO once I have submitted it? I am seeing a solicitor on Mon at the cost of £50 so at least I will know where I stand. This is a massive mess - I just want to make sure my daughter is safe and so don't really know now if I need an RO or not - the ex definitely wouldn't spend any money on a solicitor if he wasn't getting legal aid - but I thought you still got it for family issues??? Arrgghh!
Thanks for all the replies

FatVonD

Why do you want to retract it? Surely your own peace of mind (that you could get her back quickly were he to snatch her) is worth whatever it costs?

hueygeorge

Yep the peace of mind that a RO would give is priceless, I am just stressing about the entire thing. I don't want to get into a situation where he is granted unsupervised access as that will not happen - our daughter is not safe with him at the moment and regardless of a judge's decision, I'm not doing it. I have already submitted the RO to the court and have the paperwork ready to serve to the ex, but I am going to wait until I have seen the solicitor on Mon. Some solicitors that I have had free advice from have told me that the DV was too long ago - it was only Christmas! And so I can't get legal aid for help. I'm also under the impression that the ex will be able to get legal aid as he gets income related ESA. Do you know though, at the end of the day I just want the idiot to have a relationship with his beautiful daughter who is just a little girl - she's nearly 2 and a half. Another thing that worries me is that she doesn't ask about him anymore and what if she doesn't recognise him if the judge does give the ex supervised access? I worry about her mental and emotional wellbeing but at the end of the day he is her Dad and she needs to know him. Its been 3 months tomorrow though that he hasn't seen her and time is ticking....Its just a mess but hopefully Mon will bring some definite answers for me
Thanks all for the replies - much appreciated x

Ms_Chocaholic

You are applying for a Residence Order but there is no evidence at the moment that he has applied for a Contact Order. Therefore the Judge can't grant him any sort of contact, unsupervised or otherwise, as an application hasn't been made to the Court for that.

If/when he does apply for a Contact Order, then first of all he will have to stump up over £200. The matter doesn't then just go before a Judge and he decides there and then, you will be able to submit evidence that you feel he should not have unsupervised contact for reasons x, y and z. A Cafcass officer can be appointed in these cases who will speak to you and him separately and prepare a report for the Court re what's best for your little one. Evidence will be gathered during this process from agencies who have worked or are currently working with your ex to establish the full circumstances and this will help inform the Court.

I hope this helps, if anything is not clear, please post and I will be back at some point.

Ms_Chocaholic

Here's a link which confirms he won't get Legal Aid, I've just clicked through the easy to answer questions based on what info I know from your posts, if you do the same you will get the same answer no doubt.

https://www.gov.uk/check-legal-aid

hueygeorge

Ms Chocaholic - thank you!! You have probably given me a good night's sleep. From your link, yes, he will get legal aid for mediation, which is what he has done, but not for anything else. Sad to say, but he won't spend the money on a Contact Order so that's good news for me but rubbish news for our daughter as she won't see him because he won't see her with me present and wants to see her by himself. I understand that he isn't thinking properly at the moment but I cannot allow him to have unsupervised access - the situation just dictates that its not common sense. So I will continue with the RO and that will give me peace of mind if he tries to snatch her etc, at least the Police will take some action then. Hopefully his detox will have been successful and in the future he will come to his senses but who knows.
Thanks again - for once my stomach isn't churning! x

gotnodosh

I hope the solicitor on Monday will give you some good advice. Unfortunately you can't force your ex to see your DD. If he is still drinking then it is highly unlikely that he will apply for contact and I doubt any court would order unsupervised contact if there is a history of violence and alcohol abuse. Are you worried that he might snatch her? Is there a possibility that he would?

gotnodosh

Oops, cross posted.

I have been where you have been so if you ever want to pm me with any questions then please do