Should Children Have Their Own Bedrooms?

dibuzz

My 3 boys shared from the youngest being 10 months old, before that youngest shared with his sister.
the boys room is quite big, at one time we had 3 single beds, 3 wardrobes and still floor space to play.
One summer my daughter felt left out so slept in a sleeping bag on the floor for a few nights until her middle brother suggested they swap rooms for the summer.
As they got older we got bunk beds and it was only when the youngest was woken by his brother and girlfriend (who he had sneaked in after I went to bed) practicing their horizontal jogging in the bottom bunk whilst he was in the top that we turned the dining room into an extra bedroom.
My eldest and youngest (now 17 and 25) shared until 3 years ago when middle son moved out so they finally have a room each by still using the dining room as a bedroom.
They like having their own rooms now they are older but never really moaned about sharing when they had to.

SingleSue

Eldest and middle son share a room, youngest has his own room...not done them any harm at all. We were at one point put on the list for a 4 bedroom house (we probably still are but I've not pushed it) due to the two younger one's disabilities, youngest because he has a lot of medical equipment and middle son because he was so aggressive.

At the moment we are officially classed as overcrowded as middle son turned 16 last October but we are no more overcrowded than when middle son was 15, goodness knows why turning 16 makes such a difference (when in HA housing), me and my sister shared a room until I left home at 18 and it did me no harm either!

stiltwalker

We have 3 bedroom (but one is an attic) the plan when we moved here was for DD to go upstairs and for number 2, who was still in the planning stages at that point!! would have the other 1st floor bedroom. s I turned out DD's disabilities are more severe than we anticipated at that point and so she would not be able to manage the extra set of stairs. Fortunately both kids (now 2 and 4) seem to enjoy sharing - in fact I think we would have ructions if we tried to spilt them! We have just moved DS into a big boy bed and apart from a good amount of bed hopping (DD into DS's bed with him, DS into DD's bed with her and both in each other's beds) it has been a far smother transition than anticipated. (Famous last words!)

When they are older we will look again at this but as they only use the bedroom for sleeping (mobility disabilities mean taking themselves off upstairs to play in the bedroom is not going to be happening anytime soon) it doesn't seem to have any kind of urgency yet.

neverdespairgirl

I was just musing - at the non-bedroom-tax end of society, parents send their children to boarding schools where they share rooms with lots of other children of the same sex!

See this for example - you don't get much posher than Benenden, where Princess Anne went:

http://www.benenden.kent.sch.uk/2350/boarding/houses

I went to boarding school aged 11, and in Upper Third (first year), shared a dormitory with 5 other girls in my year, and from the Lower FOurth to Lower Sixth, girls shared mixed-aged dormitories.

sharnad

Don't think thrre is anything wrong in them sharing they are all boys

Spendless

Janepig wrote: »

DD (10) and DS (7) share a bedroom here, because they asked if they could share afew years ago and so we got them bunk beds in the biggest room (which was DD's at the time). DS was always crawling into bed with her from his bedroom anyway so it wasn't a big change. They don't really play in their bedroom and I've got no plans for them to have a TV in there any time soon so it's no problem, it's just a sleeping space. In fact, when I've checked on them the last two nights, they've been tucked in sleeping together on DS's bottom bunk.

We are planning on sorting out the (now) spare room in time for DD to move in there next year when she starts comp.

Jx

^^^^ This was my experience with a boy and a girl and a similar sized age gap. Though mine always had their own bedrooms, they used to do this. Even now at age 13 and 10 they will still do the occassional 'camp out' in the other ones bedroom.

Angelicdevil

In the house I grew up in, I shared with my sister until we were both early teens (at which point we got our own rooms) not for lack of rooms but my parents believed it would be good for us. My brother (younger by 6 years) always had his own room.

Now, when we're up at my parent's country house, that has enough rooms to house the entire village, my brother always ends up in my room!

I hated sharing as a young child, I was quiet my sister wasn't, but now I don't mind if my brother or sister park their backsides in my room because it's not my "personal" space. I have that in my own home.

I agree with other posters that having your own room is not essential. If your parents can afford to room you individually and choose too, great. If not, get over it.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

What do the people who 'wouldn't have' a boy and girl sharing a room think would happen?


Serious question - I shared with my elder brother (by ten years) from when I was born until 13.

thorsoak

I'm another one who shared a bed - not with one sister, but with two!!

There is 3 and a half years between the three of us (I'm the oldest) and I don't remember it being a problem at all - we giggled, wriggled, kept each other awake - had mum coming up to threaten us with all sorts if we didn't go to sleep - and we "marked out" our own areas in the bedroom with chalk lines up to the dressing table/chest of drawers/wardrobe - we played in there, would lie on our bed and read, talk, plan our futures and most of the time we were extremely happy - we would have arguments and squabbles but were - and still are - very close.

Things changed when I was 9, and my brother (who had the boxroom) was 16 - and my parents had my youngest sister. She stayed in their room until brother was 18 and did his national service - then I was promoted to his bedroom and youngest sister joined my other 2 sisters in the big bedroom - by this time with bunk beds and a single bed.

I kept the boxroom for about 4 or 5 years - brother would sleep on a studio couch in the lounge when he came home on leave and once he finished his national service, he moved into "digs" in another town as his job was moved, then he married and got his own flat.

However by the time I was 16 and sisters were 14 & 13, we wanted to share again - and littlest one had the boxroom to herself - which suited us fine because we could put a bolt high on the door to stop her getting into our makeup/clothes etc...:) And I shared the room with my 2 sisters until I left home to get married

Although we are a close family, the three of us still feel closer, all those years later.

Treevo

I think it's best but by no means necessary.