contact from absentee father after over 3 years - invite to party

Katie~baby

If we were to go to party which is in a club so lots of people not attending party there-
Do you think they would come over and talk to me/ask me before talking to dc ?[/QUOTE]

I dont think they need to ask permission to speak to your child but im sure they wont ignore you. If they have invited you im sure they will be pleased you are there and make an effort to speak to you and your child. Was the invite for both of you?

liz105

You said that both 'DC's' are at the same nursery?

Could it be something as simple as all the kids at the nursery of a similar age have been invited? And they invited your child regardless or possibly so they didnt feel left out?

Kids are very clever, they will work out, if they havent done so already, that they are related.

ailuro2

I'd claim other commitments that day- but then later in year invite her kid to your kids party...see what she does then.

Always good to be on home or neutral ground when anything major and new is happening with kids.

spoilt_BUT_appreciate_it

I'd probably decline... but I do feel that your hand is being forced, so to speak because of dc going to same nursery ... so the issue will need to be addressed...

Kimberley

liz105 wrote: »

You said that both 'DC's' are at the same nursery?

Could it be something as simple as all the kids at the nursery of a similar age have been invited? And they invited your child regardless or possibly so they didnt feel left out?

Kids are very clever, they will work out, if they havent done so already, that they are related.

I was thinking the same thing. If they do attend the same nursery then how on earth can the father not want/have contact with his absent child when he knows his other child plays with him/her nearly everyday? Thats weird :rolleyes:

desperate_mum_3

Go with your first INSTINCT , I had similar problems with ex and new partner wasn't at all happy with the arrangements they were planning involving my daughter phoned the local court asked advice from the family unit and was advised to take ex to court to get the ins and outs sorted as it is in the welfare of the child . So i did ex didn't turn up to the first hearing or he final and a court order was set up to protect my daughter from ex being able to come along take her anywhere he likes without telling me etc .... the judge was on my side from the start because i wasn't saying that i didn't want her to see her dad just that when he did see her i knew where she was , who she would be with etc ....all the things any normal mother would worry about but as the judge said if he couldn't be bothered to turn up to 2 court hearings to sort things out then he couldn't be trusted .... so as i said ...GO WITH YOUR FIRST INSTINCT ...
good luck ...

desperate_mum_3

ps .... court cases didn't cost me anything as i get working tax credit and housing benefit

onredbull

SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY

I'M SO SORRY I WROTE IT WRONG SORRY

onredbull wrote: »

It should have read "Also both dc are the same age and will be attending same school in Sept and may be in same class."

I would like to apoligise to all those who were kind enough to reply to my query and thank you all for all your replies and advise, it has given me a lot to think about and various approaches.

They both attend different nurserys at the moment but will be starting the to same school in sept.

"Go with your first INSTINCT , I had similar problems with ex and new partner wasn't at all happy with the arrangements they were planning involving my daughter phoned the local court asked advice from the family unit and was advised to take ex to court to get the ins and outs sorted as it is in the welfare of the child . So i did ex didn't turn up to the first hearing or he final and a court order was set up to protect my daughter from ex being able to come along take her anywhere he likes without telling me etc .... the judge was on my side from the start because i wasn't saying that i didn't want her to see her dad just that when he did see her i knew where she was , who she would be with etc ....all the things any normal mother would worry about but as the judge said if he couldn't be bothered to turn up to 2 court hearings to sort things out then he couldn't be trusted .... so as i said ...GO WITH YOUR FIRST INSTINCT ...
good luck ..."

Thank you for your reply, I think I am ok (ish) regarding this as my ex is not on my dc birth certificate and my dc has my surname which is different to my ex's surname, although his other dc has the same surname to his dad.

Many Thanks.