claiming income support

mar1by

I came to this forum with a genuine question. As princessdon said, we are not pretending to split up. And my husband is not doing this for selfish reasons or abandoning us. I am fully supportive of his work. An opportunity has come about where he can do some work to really make a difference to many people's lives. If he can go, that would be great. If he can't we will have to rethink and delay the plans.

I just wanted to ask a genuine question, not hear people judge us or abuse my husband when they know nothing about him or me. I have never been a benefit scrounger. The state has never had to support my children and both my husband and I have paid our taxes and NI for many, many, many years. If this is the level of responses (few exceptions of course like princessdon) then it really puts me off posting on forums like this.

Thank your princessdon for your support and understanding and to those who just repsonded to the question without turning it into a personal attack. You are the people that make forums like this work.

Dunroamin

princessdon wrote: »

It's often work choice, unless OP's job will always allow a year off.

It's just how I feel, people take the pee with public funding left right and centre. Op Is asking not "pretending to split up", I just can't help being supportive, as feel there's more worth in this than 6 kids created on benefits.

I'm a sucker for charity sadly!

The OP doesn't say that her husband is currently working or that he's allowed a year off. That may well be the case but, at the moment, you've just assumed it.

Dunroamin

mar1by wrote: »

I came to this forum with a genuine question. As princessdon said, we are not pretending to split up. And my husband is not doing this for selfish reasons or abandoning us. I am fully supportive of his work. An opportunity has come about where he can do some work to really make a difference to many people's lives. If he can go, that would be great. If he can't we will have to rethink and delay the plans.

I just wanted to ask a genuine question, not hear people judge us or abuse my husband when they know nothing about him or me. I have never been a benefit scrounger. The state has never had to support my children and both my husband and I have paid our taxes and NI for many, many, many years. If this is the level of responses (few exceptions of course like princessdon) then it really puts me off posting on forums like this.

Thank your princessdon for your support and understanding and to those who just repsonded to the question without turning it into a personal attack. You are the people that make forums like this work.

You seem to be looking at the replies the wrong way. Most people are being supportive of you and your children, being left alone for a year to fend for yourselves financially, practically and emorionally. That doesn't sound to many of us to be the action of a loving, supportive husband and father.

ETA

Although nobody has called you a scrounger it's unfair to say that you don't claim benefits as you are likely already to be getting a decent chunk from DLA, CB and CTC, quite possibly more than your husband pays in tax when he's actually employed.

DaisyFlower

Dunroamin wrote: »

You seem to be looking at the replies the wrong way. Most people are being supportive of you and your children, being left alone for a year to fend for yourselves financially, practically and emorionally. That doesn't sound to many of us to be the action of a loving, supportive husband and father.

Although nobody has called you a scrounger it's unfair to say that you don't claim benefits as you are likely already to be getting a decent chunk from DLA, CB and CTC, quite possibly more than your husband pays in tax when he's actually employed.

Totally agree.

OP, nobody is "abusing" your husband but simply pointing out that leaving a unemployed wife and children at home with no financial support is a daft idea. Charity work is great but if he wanted a year off earning, then he should have saved for that not expect the tax payer to pick up the slack.

I doubt the state has never supported you given the DLA, CB and CTC as a minimum claim plus you are not working anyway to contribute so thas was a daft statement to make.

Only carers and lone parents can claim IS and as you are neither you wont qualify. Given you can study and have a job lined up you could do agency work along side the OU. Many work and juggle studies every day. That way you can afford for your husband to leave paid work to pursue this.

Mojisola

mar1by wrote: »

I came to this forum with a genuine question. As princessdon said, we are not pretending to split up. And my husband is not doing this for selfish reasons or abandoning us. I am fully supportive of his work. An opportunity has come about where he can do some work to really make a difference to many people's lives. If he can go, that would be great. If he can't we will have to rethink and delay the plans.

I just wanted to ask a genuine question, not hear people judge us or abuse my husband when they know nothing about him or me. I have never been a benefit scrounger. The state has never had to support my children and both my husband and I have paid our taxes and NI for many, many, many years.

Here's a another genuine question - if there were no benefits to be claimed would your husband go off and leave the family for a year?

I hope not. It's only an option if the taxpayer is willing to support his wife and family while he is away.

Shouldn't his main responsibility be towards you and his children. If you start working and can support the family on your wages, that's the time for him to go.

xylophone

Every 7 years they got 3 months salary to devote to charity, he did it twice. Once following a well known natural disaster where he helped remove rubble and build and once to build IT systems in a 3rd world school.

You mean that the company paid the employee the normal salary but accepted that the employee would be working elsewhere.

This does not appear to be the case with the OP's husband? The expectation seems to be that the taxpayer supports his family while he swans off abroad, albeit to work for a charity?

McKneff

In one of your posts you say 'I don't believe in living on benefits' isn't that exactly why you posted to see exactly what benefits you can apply for so that your husband can go off on his travels.

I'm fairly sure its a wind up.

If not, he should be facing up to his responsibilities here rather than
swanning off looking after other people.

Jobseeeker

wow you are all so judgemental, this man is going to help in a life or death crisis. His family are not going to die while he is gone. We have NHS and very generous benefits system, they don't have that in the developing world.

2gorgeousgirls

Yes we do have a very generous benefit system but the OP does not know if she will be entitled to claim benefit while her husband is away as technically they are not separated so is not entitled to IS.

Also the benefit system is there as a safety net for those people in need. It is not there to fund someone choosing to leave their family for a year with no income, even if it is for something as worthwhile as volunteering abroad.

So if she is not entitled to benefit, how will she survive?

I think that ,while what her husband wants to do is admirable, his first priority is to ensure his disabled wife and children will be ok in his absence. If they have no other source of income then he should put off volunteering until they have saved enough money or OP is in work to ensure that his family will be ok.

I'm all for people volunteering to help people less fortunate than themselves but not at the expense of their own family.

Dunroamin

Jobseeeker wrote: »

wow you are all so judgemental, this man is going to help in a life or death crisis. His family are not going to die while he is gone. We have NHS and very generous benefits system, they don't have that in the developing world.

His motives might be pure but, quite frankly, he's doing exactly the same thing as a man who leaves his family for another woman, leaving the state to pick up the tab and paying no maintenance.