Paying to attend a child's birthday party.

seven-day-weekend

Spendless wrote: »

Re siblings it's due to parent stopping with child for duration of party until child is a lot older. With lots more lone parents and people living away from extended family, or work commitments of other parent it leaves more people stuck as they have no where for sibling to go during duration of party. If the party takes place in a soft play area, then it's not usually for the exclusive use of the birthday party, anyone can pay the entrance fee and have the same play, what they don't get is the birthday meal, share of cake and party bag. IME the sibling usually sits with Mum/Dad during the time that the birthday food is taking place and has something to eat with them (as most places offer food to buy also)

The whole class parties mine have experienced (I've never done one) tended to be at the younger age of the school years eg nursery/reception before child makes their own circle of friends and again at the later Primary school years when doing a joint one with another child for a more expensive venue (hire of swimming hall/ice skating) or where a hall and disco is hired and other than the amount of food needed the costs remain the same regardless of numbers.

Right,thanks, understand about the siblings. Still don't see about inviting the whole class,but there you go, I'm an old fogey in my sixties.

Kimmy1980

Wow ridiculous asking for payment to attend birthday parties. I have 4 children oldest 2 have been to numerous parties never have I been asked to pay. On the contrary I have also held lots of birthday parties at play centres ski slopes and would never ask for parents to contribute. This is def not the norm and I wouldnt attend either but instead spend the money doing something with my child. I am shocked!!

barbiedoll

I think that idea of kiddie parties has now got so competitive that parents think that they are expected to provide non-stop, top quality entertainment for 30+ kids, every time that one of their little darlings has a birthday. My son only ever had birthday parties at home, we don't have the money to spend on entertaining a whole class at a play centre, not that I would particularly want to. :eek:

We always had 6-7 of his friends round, I did the food and provided little presents for goodie bags, pass the parcel etc. I always said that I didn't expect a present from the guests although everyone always bought him something anyway. I have old videos of his parties and he and his mates always seemed to have a good time, 7 boys running around, popping balloons, stuffing their faces with cake and jumping up and down to music was enough to entertain them at that age. When he got a little older, we would take a couple of his mates to the cinema and for a pizza afterwards, or to the bowling alley. That's what we could afford to pay for and that's what he got. I wouldn't dream of laying on some fantastic day out and then charging parents for their kids to attend!

He won't be getting extravagant parties at 18 and 21 either. He can b***er off to the pub like I did!

Janepig

Spendless wrote: »

Re siblings it's due to parent stopping with child for duration of party until child is a lot older. With lots more lone parents and people living away from extended family, or work commitments of other parent it leaves more people stuck as they have no where for sibling to go during duration of party. If the party takes place in a soft play area, then it's not usually for the exclusive use of the birthday party, anyone can pay the entrance fee and have the same play, what they don't get is the birthday meal, share of cake and party bag. IME the sibling usually sits with Mum/Dad during the time that the birthday food is taking place and has something to eat with them (as most places offer food to buy also)

The whole class parties mine have experienced (I've never done one) tended to be at the younger age of the school years eg nursery/reception before child makes their own circle of friends and again at the later Primary school years when doing a joint one with another child for a more expensive venue (hire of swimming hall/ice skating) or where a hall and disco is hired and other than the amount of food needed the costs remain the same regardless of numbers.

Same reasons here for both siblings having to stay and also whole class parties. It's good form for the parents to ask the host though before bringing siblings along, but I've never known it to be a problem.

With regard to this holy grail of house parties for kids, I honestly can't think of anything I'd like less, than a gang of marauding 7 year old boys trashing my house. Not that I've got a show home, exactly the opposite in fact, but I can only just about manage to keep my two kids entertained, let alone everyone else's!! No thanks. :D

Jx

meritaten

bargainbetty wrote: »

Did you actually read the post? The writer is saying that the parents of the children hosting the party should pay for the kids attending. The birthday family pays for the birthday party.

go back and read it again - the OP is saying that the 'guests' are being charged.

geoffky

Cheap tacky parents...Stay away from them,They will be after a cup of sugar if you befriend them.

Alpha58

bargainbetty wrote: »

Did you actually read the post?.

I'm a little lost now as I thought it was advocating for "pay parties" but if I had that wrong, fair enough.

Continuing the graduation theme, making mortar boards out of card for children finishing nursery? On one level this is a bit of harmless fun but on another, it is reinforcing the idea that simply showing up for compulsory education or completing a "foundation degree" (they were called diplomas in my day) should warrant some sort of mock-ceremony. This devalues the experience for those who have gone through a degree course - my graduation wasn't exciting but it was a nice finishing touch to the years of work. There is an expectation being created that a fuss should be made of those who complete something either compulsory or low-level which is a reflection of the wider culture of instant fame and adulation that is so nastily prevalent. Does this make me a "degree snob"? Probably yes, but I don't really care, I think I have earned the right.

Birdy12

Fabforty, do you know of anybody who's accepted and will pay those prices for their children to attend? I wonder if the birthday children's parents' will have a rethink?

Just have visions of the poor birthday child standing alone at the own party because of their parents'...what's the word, stupidity? Greed? :cool:

Birdy

duchy

hayday75 wrote: »

We have always paid for our childrens parties and have noticed (recently) when they attend other kids parties we have to pay for the privilege .
I would rather not hold a party than ask parents to pay .It defeats the whole point of holding a birthday party in my opinion .

Er or decline the invite.

Really it all sounds a bit bonkers ....surely you have a party (or wedding as someone brought it up earlier) that meets your budget.... not expect the parents of your child's friends to pay for it.

I'm wondering if this is a regional thing and wonder if you (haydays) and the OP are from the same part of the country ?

duchy

jackyann wrote: »

My kids are now in their 30s, and I had never heard of this (until, as someone said, a group decision to do something for birthdays when they are old enough to sort it out themselves)
However, I recently bumped into a neighbour who moved some months ago. In the general "catch up" her 6 year old said that he had "25 friends to my birthday party" and I was surprised! Maybe this is how it was financed!

I observed over the years that many parents struggled to organise traditional parties, maybe this is how it ends up!

Thinking about it -my son's primary class were all very close (it was a tiny school with single form entry) so we used to generally invite the whole class - or just all the boys or just all the girls . So 16 or thirty kids.

I did a "leaving party" when we moved away (ended up moving back 6 months later but that's another story) with a bouncy castle and jelly and ice-cream at home but otherwise it was soft play places and when they were a little older bowling parties. For a while I managed a bowling centre and the Saturday staff loved the fact I would usually run the parties from my son's school (so much easier to sort out what the kids wanted to eat and whose turn it was to bowl next as I actually knew their names) .....and which kids were the horrors and which the "good kids".) Even after I left the job we still had bowling parties as they worked out pretty good value and the kids all had fun.