Paying to attend a child's birthday party.

neverdespairgirl

jackyann wrote: »

However, I recently bumped into a neighbour who moved some months ago. In the general "catch up" her 6 year old said that he had "25 friends to my birthday party" and I was surprised! Maybe this is how it was financed!

I observed over the years that many parents struggled to organise traditional parties, maybe this is how it ends up!

My idea of hell would be being in charge of a party of 26 6-ish year olds (-:

DS had a joint 8th birthday party this year with a boy in his class who is a couple of weeks older than him - we invited the whole class, and someof the year above, too. Fortunately for my sanity, however, his year had 12 children in it, including DS and joint birthday-boy, of the year above, year 4, we invited 8 of them (out of about 18, I think), and of the possible total of 20 children, we ended up with 14, including DS and fellow party-boy. And that was a distinct challenge to my system.

jellyhead wrote: »

My mum did me a jelly and blancmange party for my 40th

My Mum makes each of us a birthday cake around the time of our birthdays, but her 4 adult children and husband get hte basic type, and her grandson, my son, gets the full-on pirate island or Thomas-the-tank engine decorated works.

Errata

I can't help but think that the message is "You're my very dear friend but you'll have to pay if you want to be in my company".

double_mummy

paying to attend is mad!!!!!!

my LOs have parties and i would be so embarrased to even ask people to pay

on the whole graduation thing my friends son just had his graduation ceremony from nursery! gowns and hats and collecting certificates and everything!!!! some parents had bought their kids graduation presents they also have a big graduation ceremony and ball in year 6 which does come with the big dresses make up suits and limos and posh cars

i think its all a little mad

notanewuser

double_mummy wrote: »

paying to attend is mad!!!!!!

my LOs have parties and i would be so embarrased to even ask people to pay

on the whole graduation thing my friends son just had his graduation ceremony from nursery! gowns and hats and collecting certificates and everything!!!! some parents had bought their kids graduation presents they also have a big graduation ceremony and ball in year 6 which does come with the big dresses make up suits and limos and posh cars

i think its all a little mad

DD had a graduation from her playgroup (even though she's going back in Sept). It was actually a really nice opportunity to get together with all of the children and many parents. No presents, but we did all have to make a hat each out of black card.

double_mummy

notanewuser wrote: »

DD had a graduation from her playgroup (even though she's going back in Sept). It was actually a really nice opportunity to get together with all of the children and many parents. No presents, but we did all have to make a hat each out of black card.

but wouldnt it still have been nice if it had been an end of year party with parents or an end of year get together? its the graduation thing i have an issue with it used to actually mean something to be a graduate now you can be a graduate at 3 years old for doing nothing more than your parents making you go to one place for a certain amount of days

notanewuser

double_mummy wrote: »

but wouldnt it still have been nice if it had been an end of year party with parents or an end of year get together? its the graduation thing i have an issue with it used to actually mean something to be a graduate now you can be a graduate at 3 years old for doing nothing more than your parents making you go to one place for a certain amount of days

We did have an end of year party as well.

The children put their hats on, had their names read out and then sang several songs that they'd learned together with actions etc. Given that the songs were in welsh made it a bit more of an achievement in my eyes. It was an achievement for DD - she only started in April and has gone from zero welsh to knowing numbers, colours, songs, poems and 25 other children's names. As it was the first time she's been away from family members I was very proud of how confidently she'd coped and was pleased to be given a (brief) opportunity to celebrate that with her, her new friends and the staff.

I'm sorry if it's all terribly unneccessary to you, but when the other children had all known each other for almost a year, to have integrated and learned so much in such a short time was something I was happy to acknowledge.

LilChel

Wow I'm shocked that OP has been asked to pay for her child to attend a party, I'm truly gobsmacked. I'm glad that she declined the invitation.

It amazes me that the party family (not OP) I'm guessing knew their child would be having a birthday and yet hadn't saved any money, or got in extra food in their weekly shop.

It might be 'the norm' now, but when I was a kid, I had parties at home and then when I had my own family, they had parties at home usually with a fancy dress theme. Once they reached 8 or so I did parties at play areas etc as my house is too small for a class of kids, although I did manage it when they were smaller. I also knew that from xmas I would be saving for the birthdays in March, so would buy extra food in shopping. One year, there was a face painter at the party and all kids got an easter egg and a piece of cake as their party bag. I am now way a person loaded with money, in fact a single parent yet I managed to give my family a birthday party every year, but it does take budgeting. I would be embarrassed to have to ask somebody to contribute to the party, as long as the kids came and had fun doing traditional party games then what more could you ask for:)

mountainofdebt

when Junior was changing his day care nursery many many moons ago it was around his birthday so we had a birthday !!! leaving do for all the children he'd 'grown up' with......about 25 in total.

We hired the local sports hall & their soft play so all the children (and parents) came and that also allowed siblings to come (for free) as well.

Had a brillant time.

seven-day-weekend

When my son was a tot in the eighties I gave him a party, invited half-a dozen kids and that was it. I provided the food (jelly, ice cream and sandwiches) and balloons etc.

On his next and subsequent birthdays he said he didn't want a party (good lad!) and just wanted to go to the garden centre and have a big ice cream. So we invited his three closest friends, bundled them all into the car, took them all and paid for them all.

No way would we have asked anyone for any money (although if we had not been able to fit them into the car we would have asked parents to bring them).

If we'd have been asked to pay to attend a party we would not have gone.

And why do siblings have to go if they are not invited? Don't understand that! And inviting the whole class?:eek: What on earth for?

Spendless

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

And why do siblings have to go if they are not invited? Don't understand that! And inviting the whole class?:eek: What on earth for?

Re siblings it's due to parent stopping with child for duration of party until child is a lot older. With lots more lone parents and people living away from extended family, or work commitments of other parent it leaves more people stuck as they have no where for sibling to go during duration of party. If the party takes place in a soft play area, then it's not usually for the exclusive use of the birthday party, anyone can pay the entrance fee and have the same play, what they don't get is the birthday meal, share of cake and party bag. IME the sibling usually sits with Mum/Dad during the time that the birthday food is taking place and has something to eat with them (as most places offer food to buy also)

The whole class parties mine have experienced (I've never done one) tended to be at the younger age of the school years eg nursery/reception before child makes their own circle of friends and again at the later Primary school years when doing a joint one with another child for a more expensive venue (hire of swimming hall/ice skating) or where a hall and disco is hired and other than the amount of food needed the costs remain the same regardless of numbers.