Self Representation in Divorce

MonkeyLoo

Hello everyone

Would anyone know or have experience of representing their self through a divorce?
I am looking at doing this, however my ex's solicitor has refused to deal directly with me and it would appear they are forcing me into getting a solicitor of my own. Is this legal?
I understand the conflict of interest issue, however I am not looking for advice from my ex's solicitor. I am prepared to represent myself in court and handle all the legal papers myself with advice from a professional where required.

NicolaB_2

I represented myself in my divorce. It's very straightforward and you really do not need a solicitor for the divorce itself. However, I would recommend ensuring that any financial consent order is drawn up by someone legally qualified - it does not have to cost a lot, but could prevent major problems going forward.

In answer to your question, they cannot force you to get a solicitor, nor can they refuse to deal with you. You are perfectly entitle to represent yourself.

Fosterdog

AFAIK they can't force you to get a solicitor. If I were you I'd send a letter along the lines of they either agree to deal with you personally or they advise your ex to seek their legal representation from another solicitor who is prepared to deal with you. Also say that this is your final response on the matter and you will now leave it to your ex to decide how/if they still want to proceed with the divorce.

Don't let them bully you at this stage as it will leave you open to the same throughout the proceedings, stand your ground but stay fair and reasonable. If it is not a simple amicable split then you will almost certainly need a solicitor for certain aspects of the divorce but no reason to have to pay someone to do the whole thing.

RAS

Hi

You may be confusing things.

You do not need a solicitor to get a divorce; you can download the forms, complete and sign and pay the £380 fee with no solicitor.

However if you are going for a financial settlement the judge WILL ask if you have taken legal advice before they agree to sign the consent order. If you have not done this, the judge can refuse to sign the order.

Tigsteroonie

I self-repped through both the divorce & the financial proceedings whereas my Ex used a solicitor & barrister. As the financial side was actually quite simple (once it hit the court), his barrister drafted our Consent Order by hand for presentation to the Judge.

As others have said, their solicitor cannot refuse to deal directly with you. If s/he thinks you are incompetent then s/he should be rubbing their hands with glee at the prospect of taking you for everything! So perhaps you should be flattered

Pop over to the Wikivorce website & forum - there's loads of information about the process and some very good help for self-reppers (called Litigants in Person).

MonkeyLoo

Thanks for the quick replies
During my one and only telephone conversation with my ex's solicitor, he advised me to get my own solicitor and if I didn't he would "run rings around me" and "push up court costs which I would have to pay".

Seems to me like bullying tactics in order that I get a solicitor and then they can start with the letters flying back and forth at £100 each.
Ive seen it before many times and really don't want to go down that route

RAS

MonkeyLoo wrote: »

Thanks for the quick replies
During my one and only telephone conversation with my ex's solicitor, he advised me to get my own solicitor and if I didn't he would "run rings around me" and "push up court costs which I would have to pay".

Seems to me like bullying tactics in order that I get a solicitor and then they can start with the letters flying back and forth at £100 each.
Ive seen it before many times and really don't want to go down that route

It might be a good idea to record any future conversations with the solicitor?

It might also be worth paying for a half hour appointment with a good divorce solicitor.

Do use wikidivorce to the max but respect that there are some areas where you need to know the ins and outs of the law to survive.

It may be that some of the things that you said to the lawyer indicated that you did not understand the law?

We have seen some absolutely awful settlements agreed by people who did not have good (or any) legal advice particulalrly on the housing forum. The lady who did not understand that the house her husband wholly owned was part of the matrimonial assets, the lady who swapped the equity in a heavily mortgaged (and expensive) house that she could not afford to finance for the right to his large pension fund (and was left with no equity and facing repossession when house prices crashed). I could go on and on.

Tigsteroonie

MonkeyLoo wrote: »

Thanks for the quick replies
During my one and only telephone conversation with my ex's solicitor, he advised me to get my own solicitor and if I didn't he would "run rings around me" and "push up court costs which I would have to pay".

Seems to me like bullying tactics in order that I get a solicitor and then they can start with the letters flying back and forth at £100 each.
Ive seen it before many times and really don't want to go down that route

So don't. As others have said, you might need legal advice further down the line to ensure that you get a fair settlement, but that still doesn't mean you have to be legally represented.

As for "running rings around" you, well as a self-repper I ran rings around both my Ex's solicitor and his barrister :rotfl: and "pushing up court costs" is a bit of a hollow threat at this stage. Costs can be awarded in a divorce case against e.g. an adulterer or the person committing unreasonable behaviour but are always open for negotiation; and costs are only rarely awarded in the financial proceedings.

You shouldn't need to call your Ex's solicitor again, so ignore what they threatened. Always correspond with them in writing so that there is evidence.

MonkeyLoo

Thanks for the advice.
I'm not a lawyer but I have taken advice and I'm sure I can represent myself in court, daunting as it maybe.
I have a little boy in the middle of all of this and I would rather money went to him than lining a lawyers pockets.
I've been quoted astronomical sums by solicitors to represent me. All want £500 to £1000 up front before they do anything and that is just the start.

RAS

Remember there is a huge difference between getting some basic legal advice (as to what is reasonable/legal) and asking lawyer to represent you in court.

The former means a half hour at £50-100, the latter could be massive.

You need to go with a neat file of evidence plus a list of questions but it could be worth it.

MonkeyLoo

Thanks RAS, I will do that. In the long run it will pay and give me peace of mind.