Advice please -leaving husband

wheretoturnnow

Many, many thanks to all the posters who have made useful and informative posts.

I am going to carefully weigh up what you have all written and look at the links etc. See if I can work out how to proceed...

All the advice that has been given is very much appreciated, as are the good luck messages xxx

(Dovah_diva, I am sorry that I appear to have offended you, but I hardly think that was hassling....)

Dovah_diva

wheretoturnnow wrote: »

(Dovah_diva, I am sorry that I appear to have offended you, but I hardly think that was hassling....)

You really haven't offended me, but begging for information three hours after your first post is hassling. I am glad that a little patience paid off and you got the required responses.

edeneve

Hi there,
I am similar to you, single parent self employed.

As you are not on the mortgage you can get help with rent.
If you can afford to move into a rental property all you need to do is just go to local council offices and apply for local housing allowance, if you google your local gov site search LHA rates and it will tell you how many rooms and what rate you are entitled to. Then inform tax credits of single status and they will adjust your tax credits and as you are a lone parent it will be done quickly. Also ring council tax for reduced single rates.

You will I think be eligible for a 4 bed house as your girls of 16 & 18 are classed as adults, so a room each for each of you, which gives you a higher rate of LHA. if the 18 yr old is staying in uni accomodation though will be 3 bed rate.

Loca housing allowance will want to see bank statements to see earnings or a projected self employed earning form, its not too hard to do and then they will confirm this with hmrc end of year tax return.

Once you have LHA in place its ongoing, you just inform them of any changes, jobs, income etc.

Your husband will need to contribute 20% of earnings towards maintenance of the girls and the assets in the house of 20K could be mutually sorted between you. When I divorced we did it ourselves at cost of £30 and court fees. My husband kept the house, it was transferred into his name so had nothing to do with me irregardless of still being married.

If you are claiming benefits for the girls and he agrees to pay maintenance, perhaps he could keep the equity in the house and just pay a higher amount of maintenance say 25% to you-that way it would be a clean break and no arguing about dividing money and also no savings to affect applying for benefits. Usually its the financial stuff that causes stress and friction in divorce, any way of avoiding this and coming up with an amicable solution i would reccomend, at the end of the day its the solicitors that only benefit.

Entitled to is usually correct, you will also be eligible for 70% towards any childcare costs.

It all feels a bit much at first but it soons gets sorted and then you can enjoy your new life.

Good luck x

wheretoturnnow

Edeneve - that is tremendously useful information, thank you. Great to hear from someone in a similar situation.

We are very much trying to keep it amicable - partly to make it easier for us, but mainly to make it easier for the girls. And if possible we would still like to both be with them on important birthdays etc...

You have certainly given me food for thought, and suggestions about how to move forward. Thank you xx

wheretoturnnow

Also, a friend has offered that I could rent her house from her, on a 'pay what I can afford each month' basis ie no written contract.

If I took her up on this, would I still be able to claim housing benefit? Do they need a formal contract?

Just trying to work out if I would actually be better off to rent somewhere 'officially' rather than accept her astonishingly generous offer.

x

RAS

edeneve wrote: »

If you are claiming benefits for the girls and he agrees to pay maintenance, perhaps he could keep the equity in the house and just pay a higher amount of maintenance say 25% to you-that way it would be a clean break and no arguing about dividing money and also no savings to affect applying for benefits.

Please get proper legal advice and benefits advice.

What eve has described is NOT a Clean Break settlement; it is on-going and would only be valid for one year after which your ex could revert to the 20% CSA requirement and you would have very little opportunity to do anything without paying out masses of legal fees.

Secondly, failure to take your share of the equity might well be regarded by the benefits assessors as deliberate deprivation of assets. If they decide this, they assess you as if you have still got the savings even if you never had them. So you lose both the savings and the benefits.

Get proper advice, please OP.

RAS

wheretoturnnow wrote: »

Also, a friend has offered that I could rent her house from her, on a 'pay what I can afford each month' basis ie no written contract.

If I took her up on this, would I still be able to claim housing benefit? Do they need a formal contract?

Just trying to work out if I would actually be better off to rent somewhere 'officially' rather than accept her astonishingly generous offer.

x

This might be considered a contrived tenancy. She needs to charge the market rate whoever rents the house if the tenant is going to claim LHA.

What is the LHA rate for your area?

zzzLazyDaisy

ermine wrote: »

Try the CAB boards on here - there are several things all intersecting and you probably need advice in person as to the issues. They have a HB section. And good luck!

Just to say that the CAB boards on MSE closed in December 2012

wheretoturnnow

Does it still need to have a contract? This is what she wants to avoid really, hence the only-paying-what-I-can-afford thing. To clarify, I would not expect to claim the full amount unless I was paying this to her, if you see what I mean, it isn't me trying to gain extra money unlawfully.

The LHA Turn2us quoted is £183.46 per week.

Thank you, RAS

RAS

Why does she want to avoid a contract?

Assuming you are in England and Wales you are BOTH bound by statute law so she cant get you out in the first 6 months, she needs to give two months notice and you have to give one month's (both in line with the rental date) during a periodic tenancy.

She has to provide a gas certficate and register any deposit in a scheme and pay HMRC.

In Scotland she has to be regsitered as a LL and the fines for failure are high.