pls help

japmis

metso wrote: »

It's on the top floor and feels secure, which seems to be important to me because I tend to go away a lot for work for periods of time so could end up leaving the property unattended.

......on a different note entirely, please make sure you mention your stays away when getting home insurance.

On the flat issue, have you a list of needs, wants and nice to haves? How many does this flat tick?

Only fools rush in, take your time, view as many as you feel comfortable with; if you're going to live there for the foreseeable future it needs to be something you're happy with

ACG

Ive not read all of that, its too long and its been a long day, however....

You and your girlfriend are buying.
Not you, your girlfriend and her parents.

Sit down with your girlfriend, decide what you afford and what you both want for now and say the next 5 years.

Then look for what you want.


I (notice the I) bought my house 6 months ago solely in my name as i put the deposit down. We decided how we wanted the bathroom doing and my gf spent a few days with her dad who decided how we should have it as he was doing the work on it (even though nobody actually asked - although i am grateful). I basically told my mrs we had decided and shes now changing her mind, thats fine but decisions should be made by us not them... a few strong words and all was sorted.

Basically, you are BOTH going to be spending a lot of money here - grow a set and stand up for what you want. If it causes an argument or disagreement then so be it. Dont purchase a house your not happy with and live to regret it - its the biggest purchase of your life! Dont mess it up.

grifferz

Taking advice from other people, family, friends etc. is perfectly fine as long as they are aware that their role is solely to advise, not to dictate.

You also have to be aware of what it is you want exactly, so as others have said you need to list out your requirements and decide which of them are non-negotiable and which could be compromised on.

If you don't do this then you will be likely to waste the time of agents and sellers, but much worse than that you will waste your own time and likely end up paying over the odds for something you aren't happy with.

After getting your head clear about what it is that you want, you perhaps would benefit from viewing the flat a second time to have another think about whether it does or does not tick all the right boxes including cost at the level your offer has already been accepted at.

Should you decide (rather than just fear) that you did indeed make an ill-judged offer, then all you need to do is contact the agent and explain that you now feel on reflection that you have offered too much and are withdrawing that offer. You can apologise for wasting their time and the time of their client, and as long as you don't drag things out too far there shouldn't be too much hard feelings from the agent. The agent probably sees this sort of thing every day. The vendor may be slightly more upset at you, but you don't need to talk to them ever again.

If the property is one you would be happy with just at a lower price, you then have nothing to lose by offering that as your best and final offer. The chances of this being accepted are, as everyone has said, incredibly low. But you have nothing to lose and you can feel free to admit to the agent that you know that. You never know.

Provided that there actually are suitable properties on the market that are within your budget, the agent is not going to be too upset that you've withdrawn your offer as they should be happy to try to sell you something else.

If you need more help making decisions then people on MSE are on the whole a friendly bunch. Just be aware that as so much of house buying is personal and subjective opinions, no one can really put an exact price on properties to tell you that you got a good deal.

For the basics, checking recent sold prices and the rest of the market is the best you can do, although I realise this is challenging if you're looking to buy in E2 as prices are going up fast enough that records from 6 months ago are no longer that helpful.

I think that your mother and girlfriend are right to try to spur you into home ownership if you can afford it, but you need to draw a line regarding how pushy they can be on what is likely to be your biggest financial transaction for some time to come.

metso

wow,

I am absolutely blown away by all the feed back here on the forum, You all have been really helpful and I very appreciate your patience and time to read my post and then to respond.

I've spoken to my GF & mum and we're all cleared the air, unknown to me at the time my mum asked my GF not to pressure me too much and perhaps I misread my mums enthusiasm the minute she arrived back from holiday, where upon the moment she first sat down instead of telling us about her holiday she launched into quizzing us about our house search and I misread it as her pressuring us or me.

As an update to the days events,

I did end up calling the EA and advised him that I was withdrawing my bid on account that having done my research and general decor of the place, I advised him that I would like to revise my bid and offered 15k below what I had originally offered (Asking Price)

He was polite about it and said he would advise the vendor. (This was about 2pm)

He called me back at 5:45 advising me that the vendor was a little surprised by my revision but said he would think about it.

Meanwhile a couple currently renting within the building put an offer in thru the EA's colleague at 10k below asking (5k above my revised offer)

The EA said the vendor response was that who ever will meet at 5k below asking price will get it.

My feeling is this property has been on the market for 2 weeks and then if everything the EA has told me is true, suggests that the property has had 2 offers within as many days.

The EA advised me that the renting couple have a 15% deposit. (I have a 60% deposit) having done a little maths the renting couple will have to pay approx £300 over what they pay for renting a similar 2 bed property.

My instinct tells me if I match the renting couple's offer we'll get it...

I do like this property but having read your comments I have asked myself this question about whether I can live there and I believe I can. The only compromise I'll be making is I don't have any outside space but I gain a car parking space which because of my job etc and the need to hire a car when I work, means I can park the car with the gated space and feel good about it... When I ask myself can I live there, its a hard question because my GF and I have been on the move for approx 6:7 years whilst saving so any kind of place is a home to us. That being said, my long term thinking is to only have it for 10 years and then move on to somewhere else.

grifferz

My instinct is that the other couple do not exist and that if they do, the agent should not be telling a third party (you) what their financial situation is. The most they should be saying is, "they are more proceedable than you are". But there is no easy way to be sure.

Offer £5k below asking only if that makes sense to you regardless of what anyone else would offer.

It's early days for you and for this property.