Comedy Enquiry Responses

Adman1138

My gf and I are FTBs slowly edging towards completion on our first house.

Yesterday we got the results of the solicitors searches through and a couple of the answers given by the vendors were mildly amusing.

Q. Is the loft insulated?
A. It's full of manure.

Q. On collection day where should the bins be left?
A. On the chimney.

I'm currently assuming that both of these were facetious answers given by a vendor sick of answering a long list of questions, but I'm surprised it got through both their solicitor and our solicitor.

Has anybody else had and strange answers to enquiry questions?

Excited13

I wouldn't dare reply that on a legal document but it would make me chuckle. Do you have the vendors contact details as I'd be inclined to reply to them with further queries!!!

Herbalus

When you give your solicitor their fee, get them one of those children's cheques for a thousand playpark dollars (or similar).

And as for the vendors: if they think it's a game, pay them for the house in monopoly money.

ElkyElky

I'd sue after moving in. When you discover there isn't any manure in the loft despite the vendor declaring so on these important documents, you will of course be disappointed. :rotfl:

Tiddlywinks

How would the collection point for bins on bin day impact on your buying decision? You could just do what everyone else does and ask a neighbour or just copy what everyone else does on your first bin day.

Plus, what would you have done if the loft had not been insulated? It's not really an expensive job so hardly worthy of additional negotiation.

I'm with the vendor... these questions are a bit down in the weeds aren't they?

MarkBargain

ElkyElky wrote: »

I'd sue after moving in. When you discover there isn't any manure in the loft despite the vendor declaring so on these important documents, you will of course be disappointed. :rotfl:

Or when you move in and find it IS full of manure, there will be nothing you can do.

Dan-Dan

or , when it becomes apparent they really do collect the bins from the chimney.....

chickaroonee

To be fair, those questions are a bit banal. Bin day is easy to find out yourself, and didn't you look in the loft or have a survey?

Surprised their solicitor sent it on to you though.

HildaM

When my husband was selling his late mother's house, the questions dragged on and on and on. Eventually his solicitor suggested they put the house back on the market and answered the last raft of questions with some less than business-like responses.

For example the answer to question 2a was "Really? You're asking this now?"

The answer to question 4c was "See 2a" :rotfl:

They exchanged and completed (on the same day) less than a week later.

G_M

What would worry me is not the answers given to those two questions.

It is the indication that other answers may also be inaccurate/unreliable.

As Herbalus says above, the vendors seem to think it is a game.

Yes. Very funny. But there are £100,000s at stake.

If a vendor (understandably) thinks a Q is banal/obvious/whatever,it is easy to just repeat "The purchaser should rely on his own investigations" to each irrelevant Q, whilst answering other Q.s honestly/helpfully.

Not take the p*ss.

I'd be tempted to walk away, but of course you'll have too much emotion/£ already invested in the purchase.

unrecordings

The vendors are trying to be clever and, I think you have a fairly simple clear cut response: Reduce your offer by £1000 to have the manure removed from the loft and a further £500 to retrieve the bins from the chimney