The OS Doorstep - a helpful and supportive thread in these tough times

nursemaggie

I am Pooky it will save some money.

monnagran

It's a poser, isn't it? You follow your heart and hope that you're not being taken for a ride or you steel yourself and then beat yourself up for not doing anything to help. I'm fortunate in meeting many homeless or desperate people who, with a little bit of love and concern, have managed to turn their lives round completely. Lots of them had never been shown any affection or respect before and don't really understand where you are coming from.
I simply love them, alcoholics, drug abusers, ex-prisoners, down and outs, they are all people.
I'm sure that I have been taken advantage of many times, but I figure it doesn't make me a bad person. I would rather be made a mug of 100 times than miss one opportunity to make the vital difference to someone's life.

Mar: There are some groups that are tackling the problem but most of them, though not all, are church based and I've known some church based ones that are a bit picky about who they help. I think that small, enlightened groups are sometimes better than big charities but they are only as good as the people in charge of them. That's not much help but it's all very local and you just have to keep your eyes open to spot them.

I would never, never give someone on the streets money. Food, hot drinks, a warm blanket, waterproof clothing and if they have a dog, dog biscuits, but if they spurn any of those then they are probably not genuine.

Clambers gingerly down off her soap box.

x

katep23

monnagran wrote: »

I would never, never give someone on the streets money. Food, hot drinks, a warm blanket, waterproof clothing and if they have a dog, dog biscuits, but if they spurn any of those then they are probably not genuine.

Clambers gingerly down off her soap box.

x

And that's all you can do.


I meant offer useful things, not climbing off soap box!

chickens11

SQ....Im glad that you did help the gent , but I always was taught "life is what you make it", and it is that , id do everything I could not to lose my home , and like most people you have to work to keep it and juggle finances , if I chose to drink and smoke then id probaly lose my home , then that would be my own doings , but would I beg people for food and money ?, No because I wouldnt allow myself to become homeless......
Ive known some real hard times when having a family to raise , as most of you all have too, but you do everything in your power to get through it.........A lot of homeless people have a drink problem , drugs too , if they really wanted to help themselves then they could.......
I couldnt just sit on my butt expecting someone to throw dosh in my hat , or feed me ......Youve given him food and thats fair enough , now you can sit comfortably in your own home , knowing that you work and pay to be in your home , please dont feel guilty..........

My friend took me to nearest town today in the wheelchair , she kept making sure she took me in shops and checking where I wanted to go etc , looking after me very well, I had to push money into her hand for the car parking , I made sure I paid for the coffee and cake , she didint like me paying ...
I bought myself a red deer cushion and 2 money tins , you know the ones where if you want to get the money out you have to chisel it open, Ive got one for a holiday tin , and the other one for car repairs if something expensive may go wrong........
I felt a bit of a nuisance in the wheelchair as even 2 inch kerbs were hard to get over with the chair.......I did enjoy getting out of the house for 2 to 3 hours , lovely.......I had my appointment for my next foot op and its on November 24th , be glad to get it done, so ive written off rest part of this year recuporating , look forward to January coming where hopefully I will have 2 lovely new feetlets ha ha ..I hope you are all having a lovely half term , still cant believe how good the weather is .....Sheila

savingqueen

Thanks everyone for your contributions - you are all right in your different posts, as ever so wise. I know money isn't the answer (I didn't and wouldn't), I know we need to make sure we keep a roof over our own heads first (always always always our main concern as parents and with no wider family to help if TSHTF), I know some people don't take responsibility, the issues of alcohol and drugs (have alcoholics both side of our family) and I know I can't save the world however much I would like to (done the breakdown bit already.)
Feelings and thoughts are one thing, actions another though. I promise to put a line under it and not feel guilty as it will do me no good and help no-one but I will find some way, however small to help. Our boys save 2 weeks pocket money in December (small sums) and pick a charity to donate to. They have been worried about the homeless man so we will pick a homeless charity and I will add a little money as I promised I would do now I don't send cards out to my side of extended family. I have tried to find a local shelter looking online and there seems to be none so the place the man told me about does seem the closest, how you are meant to get there with no money though, it was way too far to walk? The council advice is flimsy as well. I will ask my churchy friend, she may know some local orgs.
I feel like you monna, people are people. If I see anyone upset when I am out and about, my natural instinct is to ask if they are ok, whoever they are. Maybe I shouldn't but I do. I am starting back at the school after the break as a volunteer but maybe later I will think about a different sort of volunteering environment. I would never have felt like this a year ago so I thank that man for speaking with me - he doesn't realise how much he has helped me think about all sorts of things.


Right now I have sorted out my head - thanks everyone, I will get some shuteye! Glad you had a lovely time out Sheila.

savingqueen

kboss2010 wrote: »

There's this thing I heard about recently, an online forum is promoting. I think it's unofficially called the Smile Project and the idea is that people who live in busy urban areas where people can be busy, unfriendly and antisocial simply smile and say good morning/afternoon to people they pass in the street/sit next to on a bus etc. nowadays we often view kindness of strangers with suspicion and rarely know who our neighbours are and I think the point is to go back to a time when people didn't always regard others with suspicion.


I'm naturally a trusting person but, because of that, I'm wary of people because I've had so many bad experiences. I hate that and want things to be different.

Anyone else fancy giving it a go?

Love the sound of the project kboss! I do that anyway and will keep it up and try and extend it. I was painfully shy for years and too frightened to speak with a stammer - nowdays I find face to face contact so much easier and seem to be making up for lost time. More recent friends think it funny when I say I am shy underneath as I talk so much (even on a forum :rotfl:)
A smile takes such a little effort and yet can make such a big difference! I am very trusting but also trust my instincts (and doing a self defence course helped in that regard) and think I have a reasonably good balance.

stiltwalker

Monna - I want to hug you - I am so glad I do not live in a city any more (did briefly a huge number of years back and never really recovered) I always want to think the best of folk and help them out as there are moments in my past where I have been scarily close to an underpass or local bridge (IYSWIM), but it is so hard to know who is genuine and who not so I tend towards giving hot food or drinks (if unappreciated then they don't need it) and donating to food banks and shelter when I can afford to.


Sleep is calling now so catch you all later - take care all - Hx

Possession

I just saw on the Frugaldom email shot that Poundstr*tcher are/were selling sugar for 49p a kilo. I shall have a trip there today in the hope that's still true as I have lots of little kilner jars and thought I'd try some chilli jam to sell on our local Facebook selling site.

Otherwise having a bad week it seems.

savingqueen

Hello everyone

Very warm here and max temps this afternoon are forecast at 66F! Unbelievable! I am enjoying the unseasonal weather as my washing is drying on the line (or almost drying) and I feel happier with sunshine as do our old cats, especially stripey cat. No need for heating either so win win for me.

DS7 came into bed with us for part of last night so feeling a bit sleepy this morning. 2 cups of coffee seem to have had no effect either. I have several tasks half completed so need to finish today and we are making some Halloween treats. Beds airing and need to be made up with clean bedding later. DS7 need to finish his homework project so we can email it to daddy at work to print it off.

Hope everyone has a good day today

fuddle

Ergh, it's icky. It just shouldn't be this mild.

Day off today, well 3 if we include the weekend More in the way of housework stuff and I will get that daily fly lady rota written up today.

I have moved our book case from the landing. It's now in the living room, in the corner next to the door. I am sat here typing away now, all uncomfy as there's no place for my knees but it's going to be the organisational hub of the house. I will set about moving the noticeboard to there soon, as well as my NVQ stuff. I will look at a desk in the future but this set up works for now so...

I have had my appointment for knee physiotherapy through. It's in 2 weeks time. I am struggling at the moment as it feels like I have 'growing pains' in my knees constantly. I wish I had pushed the MRI scan route as I feel like I have been put down the wrong path with pysiotherapy, fobbed off a little even. The blood test showed normal for rheumatoid thank goodness and the x ray was clear with regard to my bones but that doesn't tell me what is going on around the knee joints. We'll see what the pysio says. I think this is going to be a long battle.

Well halloween today. Like everything I do, I do it in a way that is right for my family. I see halloween as a time to have a little fun. I'm not into the traditions or deeper darker message behind it. We do it to have fun with the kids.

We're having these for tea



putting these in the hedge



doing this to the toilet paper



and using my work gloves to give the girls some sweet treats



The girls will wear their masks they made and we will go out for a walk in town and wander around the floodlight minster for a spooky time and a laugh. We don't do trick or treating.

Have a good day everyone. I had best get moving.