Help me... I guess it's time to just reach out and touch...

PanickingHARD

Please be gentle! ;-)

I have rather a lot of debt... £23k ish unsecured personal...

Mainly Loans and CC's after break-up with ex, spending too much, too quickly and then getting made redundant... I am finding it VERY hard to keep up repayments and still pay my rent, etc and have anything other than enough for a packet of fags!!! (Ok... over exaggeration, but only a little one)... I often miss payments and go over my limit and things...

I'm crap at looking after my money in general, (I am trying to improve though) but I need to get this sorted, as it is rapidly becoming VERY unmanageable... Which is getting me down...

I can't get any more from my bank (£1,200 OD) so am looking (very cautiously) at getting a loan from the likes of Cahoot/Direct Line to clear the whole lot and spread the loan over as long a term as possible... My credit rating won't be great though...

I am (only now, went 3 months with no pay cheque) fairly well paid, but the debt is very messy, and mostly at CRAP rates... especially for the cash advances on cards...

I'm hopeful someone on here will have some good ideas on what to do, beyond the obvious "stop your non essential spending" which I have done...

I have about £10k of equity in a house with my ex, but it's not selling (12 months) and she is VERY reluctant to buy me out, regardless of the fact that she still lives there... understandably, I guess, if it's not selling... the whole thing was very friendly between us, and I really would like to keep it that way...

Once I get that, things will ease, but I can't count on that any time soon... I also work on annual bonuses in addition to my salary... IN THEORY, if my debt doesn't get any worse for the next 12 months, with the house selling and me hitting a good (and that is possible) bonus, I could have this paid off in full by April... if any of that goes wrong, I could be totally well... £&*%£$. And as i'm virtually unable to meet all my comittments at the moment, April '08 may as well be April '28

Any ideas, thoughts, whatever would be great... Even jokes at my expense... At least I'll get a laugh!!! :-|

Thanks all...

Skint_Catt

:hello: We're always gentle! Don't know who told you otherwise

How about posting a full list of incomings and outgoings inc debts with balances, APR's and min payments and we'll see what we can do for you!!!

Welcome!

Sea78

Hugs to you - sounds like you're really stressed. i would advise against a loan really, but in order for us to really help, take a look at the first time posters thread and have a go at your SOA so we can see where your money is going.

Sea xxx

Annie_Fanny

hello panicking!

welcome to mse! you have come to the right place for advice.

the first step you need to take is to prepare a 'Statement of Affairs' (SOA) which will shed some light on your situation so that we can advise ways to cut back etc.

have a look at this thread for advice on how to prepare an SOA.

http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=107280

good luck!

annie

PanickingHARD

Ok... Maybe I jumped the gun a little... There is SOOO much information on here, I think I just got a little blinded by it... I will go straight home from work (like a good boy! ;-) ) and try and follow everyone's suggestions and get ready to be helped!!! :-) My "SOA" will be on here tonight... Assuming my boss lets me leave!!

Thanks to all who've replied so quickly, and those who (I hope) will reply later!!

I usually would NEVER ask anyone for help, but I fear things are now out of hand... :-(

Thanks again...

Sea78

Asking for help uis the first step to dealing with it all - so well done! Look forward to seeing your SOA later

Sea xx

consumerpower

Hay,

I joined a month ago, and everyone here is fab. If you are ready and willing, your at the right place, and you can turn your life around very quickly. (Although the actually paying it off can take longer I am afraid).

So welcome, stay on here, and in touch, and your be debt free in no time.

A big hug xxx

Molanole

Hiya - just wanted to say welcome and also that you're not the only one with debts around the 23K mark! There are many more with even higher debts so no one is going to judge you for that.

Look forward to seeing your SOA later on.

Mola x

PanickingHARD

Well...

I just spent 3 hours on here typing out all my SOA and working everything out... hit the 'post' button to find I'd been timed out and lost all the info...

Lesson learned!

I'm going to go to bed now and try and get some sleep... the VERY short version of my 'lost' post is that I have worked everything out and I am actually £27,717 in debt... I could cry...

I feel so sick...

I have no idea how I am ever going to get out of this and even reading the AMAZING debt diaries on here (onedayIwill... you are my hero!!!) by others seems to offer little comfort... I'm trying to remain positive, but I'm struggling...

I will try and post SOA and all the rest asap, for now, I'm goin gto go and stare at the ceiling for a few hours before work....

Nite all...

momisa

Calm down - RIGHT NOW!!

3 positives for you - just in case you're still logged on...

1 - You know there's a money issue

2 - You've asked for help, seen the light and come to the right place

3 - You're working and have money coming in

Once you've posted your SOA you'll get tons of help.

Make sure you're are eating and drinking and generally taking good care of yourself.

If you can't sleep don't get annoyed/frustrated even more by just lying there, get up and watch a DVD which you enjoy or read a book. Hopefully this will ease your mind and Mr Sandman will pay you a visit

Welcome aboard!!

brainfreeze

Hi PanickingHard

Firstly - hello and welcome.

Secondly - you do not have to struggle though this alone - MSE DFWs are the most amazing non-judgemental people in the world.

Thirdly - it is amazing how quickly you will change from despair and avoiding confronting the debts to literally wanting the postman to bring a credit card statement just so you can put the latest figures in your snowball.

If you haven't found it already...throw your debt figures into the snowball calculator at what's the cost

It really is a life changing event (for the better) and I know I am so grateful to all the DFWs (old and new) for the unfailing support and help....but most especially to Martin for putting this amazing site together and giving us all the inspiration and direction we need.