Making a will is giving me sleepless nights 19 June 2013 at 2:35PM in Over 50s MoneySaving 18 replies 3.6K views

spring_watch_girl

I really need to make a will but I am struggling with how to do the right thing. My 2 eldest children are married to people who do not like me and my husband. I really can't bear the thought of them benefiting financially when our time comes. My sons wife is so tight she would split a currant in 2 (we get recycled gifts at bdays and xmas. ) they have 2 sons who have never bought us a present (they are both working). My daughters husband has had affairs and run them into debt countless times. I feel like giving their share to charity but I feel guilty but just can't bear the thought that I am denying my son/daughter their inheritance. Would appreciate advice.

Lovelyjoolz

Do you mean that you don't want money to got your childrens' spouses in the event of their death? Or that you dpn't want the money to go to your children at all?

Lovelyjoolz

Sorry, ended post prematurely there!

You can set it up so that your child's inheritance goes to their children in the event of their death and not to their spouse. If their children are under 18, the money would then go into a trust for them.

If one of your children doesn't have their own children then their inheritance can revert back to your estate to be distributed to their sibling instead of their spouse.

Someone I know has recently made a will out saying just this.

Errata

Leave it all to your OH and let him worry about it when the time comes;)

Dunroamin

Leave it to your favourite charities with a clear conscience - at least they'll be grateful for it!

Savvy_Sue

If you do decide to write your older children out of your will, it's usually a good idea to explain why. However, it could cause a lot of aggravation within the family.

It sounds as if you don't want it to go to their children either. Fair enough, but again it could cause a lot of aggro.

And the other thing is, you don't know what the future holds. Any of your children might 'see the light' and leave these people who you say don't like you - but it sounds as if the feeling is mutual. Or either of them might die before you. Unless you want to be changing your will every time something happens within the family, you need to consider those possibilities: it would be awful if one of your children didn't benefit because of an out of date reason.

kazwookie

Go out and spend it all on holidays and such like, then there won't be anything left so it won't be a problem.

NAR

SWG go out and spend spend spend on yourselves and leave as little as possible. Mean tight miserable gits should be treated likewise - leave them as little as possible.

chesky

This is where a good will solicitor can be so helpful. They can suggest options you hadn't even thought of - say like leaving a sum of money to your daughter if she is separated or divorced at the time of your death. (I don't know if this is actually an idea, just something to consider).

Also, you mention your 'oldest' children - do you have others?

savingjenny

it's your money, leave it to who ever you want!

seven-day-weekend

The best advice would be to see a solicitor.