over reacting?

Curious_George_2

Right... this is a 2 parter (so the thread botherers dont move this down to the dark place at the bottom of the board :rolleyes: )
We need a first stage car seat, preferably not bank breakingly expensive but definitely has to be brand new,
it only needs to be first stage (as we already have the armchair style one for later on!) but some recommendations would be great!
we just cant pick!

and.....the 2nd part, I was upset last night and im still kind of cross now but... im pregnant, emotional and could be over reacting
what do you think?
my daughter spent some of the weekend staying with my sister and yesterday on the way home they popped into a mutual friends house, my girl didnt just want to pop in then leave so our friend said she could stay for tea and they would drop her home a bit later.. it threw my plans out a little but it was fine,
anyway.... much later i get a phone call from the freind saying her husband had been out to drop DD home but halfway here she decided she wanted to go straight to her dads instead (my ex oh - he lives just round the corner from us) and despite the fact that the husband had never met ex OH, and had no idea where he lived... he took directions off a 6 year old and then dropped her off there,
she had no sleeping over stuff there, wasnt supposed to be staying over last night anyway but that wasnt a problem really,
what really bugged me was the husband not having the sense to just bring her home like he was supposed too and let me deal with the sleepover decisions... or at least phone to ask what he should do,
then half an hour later i get a phone call from a hysterical friend (who is going mad at her husband) saying things to me like "he does live in flat X doesnt he?" like they are not entirely sure wether she has been delivered to the right place!!!
she is only 6... as far as im concerned where she wants to go and where she is actually going are two different things!

on top of that, the friend keeps asking if they can have DD tomorrow and thursday and they and the kids will all go to the cinema and have a jolly old sleepover etc, i said it was unlikely as ex OH has plans for this week but DD came home telling me all about the great time they are all going to have... like its already been decided without any imput from us parents, so i have had to tell DD this morning that she cant go because there are already things booked.
and rightly or wrongly im a little annoyed....

somebody please tell me im not mental

**Patty**

Can't help you with the car seat as i'm well past that stage

But as for the second bit:

No, you're not mental.

In your shoes, I probably would have *gone mental*.
A child of 6 should have been returned to you, not taken *wherever she wanted to go*

You are the parent with care.

Simple as that.


And i'd have ripped into the friends husband something chronic had it have been me.:mad:

jlj_2

I don't think you are mental. I would feel exactly the same, in fact I think you've reacted much better than I would have done!!

Curious_George_2

**Patty** wrote: »

Can't help you with the car seat as i'm well past that stage

I thought I was too

thanks for the reasurrance... ive got to phone my sister at some point today and tell her that DD wont be attending the cinema and other activities tomorrow and thursday and i will be telling her why too...(she was going to be there too... and i will get her to tell the friend for me...i really dont want to talk to her at the moment)
i just didnt want to sound overly upset about it all if they are going to roll thier eyes at me and put it down to hormones (god i hate that)

Penny_Watcher

Curious_George wrote: »

what do you think?

my daughter spent some of the weekend staying with my sister and and despite the fact that the husband had never met ex OH, and had no idea where he lived... he took directions off a 6 year old and then dropped her off there,

somebody please tell me im not mental

I'm speechless :eek:

Is this man deranged?

"Hello Mr Auntie's Friend's Husband. I'm 6 years old. Please drop me at a strange house with a man you don't know."

That is so far beyond irresponsible as to be dangerous (especially with the whole Madeleine McCann thing in the news). I'm sure her parents believed that she would be safe in the same way the man that dropped off your daughter believed her to be safe.

I'd be having strong words with your mutual friend.

patchwork_cat

Hi
No I would be livid, but I am a bit confused is this your sister or a friend. Was the wife thinking that her OH had done a stupid thing in taking your daughter to her dad's? Maybe she is wanting to make sure there are no hard feelings and that is why she is nagging about the cinema.

Curious_George_2

patchwork_cat wrote: »

Hi
No I would be livid, but I am a bit confused is this your sister or a friend. Was the wife thinking that her OH had done a stupid thing in taking your daughter to her dad's? Maybe she is wanting to make sure there are no hard feelings and that is why she is nagging about the cinema.

its a friend who is one of my sisters best mates from school so we have all known each other for years,
yes the friend was livid with her husband and was yelling at him while we were on the phone last night, she is completely over protective of thier little one and this is her worst nightmare...
and she was nagging about the cinema before this happened!
the friend and my sister both have girls that have just turned three and apparently they are easier to manage on a day out if my DD is there too.... although any talk of my girl being a calming influence i have yet to believe

I just spoke to my sister and she was gobsmacked...and sounded like she was going to phone up friends husband and give him a gobful too!
good!

Broken_hearted

Livid I'd have been scared stiff and straight on the phone to ex to make sure she was there.

daphne_descends

:eek: I had to read that twice - she is SIX years old?! Has he apologised?

Curious_George_2

Broken_hearted wrote: »

Livid I'd have been scared stiff and straight on the phone to ex to make sure she was there.

I was...but all i could manage to get out was "is XXXXX there with you?" and heard him say yes before having to pass the phone to my OH to speak to him because i was too upset to speak (i cant get angry without crying like a baby when im pregnant... its so annoying!)

ex didnt think it was too much of a big deal (probably why i thought i might of over reacted a little) until i asked him what he would do if he was dropping somebody elses child home and they wanted to go somewhere he had never been to meet up with a person he had never met??
"hmmmn... when you put it like that...." :rolleyes:

fac73 wrote:

I had to read that twice - she is SIX years old?! Has he apologised?

yup....seven on saturday... though that wouldnt make any difference in this situation!
and while i could hear him grovelling for forgiveness in the back ground when the friend was shouting at him...I havent heard from him, no.

Spendless

[quote=Curious George;5314399on top of that, the friend keeps asking if they can have DD tomorrow and thursday and they and the kids will all go to the cinema and have a jolly old sleepover etc, i said it was unlikely as ex OH has plans for this week but DD came home telling me all about the great time they are all going to have... like its already been decided without any imput from us parents, so i have had to tell DD this morning that she cant go because there are already things booked.
and rightly or wrongly im a little annoyed....

somebody please tell me im not mental [/quote]Re this bit, is it possible that other children at your friends house have told your child, we are going to do x, y and z, and friend has said I'll have to ask your mum.