Very small family

gwen80

NervousHomeowner wrote: »

It gets easier with time Just remember that, as much as it is difficult to start with, you will manage and you will learn to cope! Moving away definitely encourages you to become more independent, which can be a fun experience in itself

I think the worst part of moving away for me was worrying about my mum & how she'd cope without me. I don't know if this is likely to be a problem for you but does your mum have a good group of friends or anything who can keep her company & help her cope? It made me feel better to know that my mum had friends who were going around to check on her & keep her company.

Will your mum be able to visit you? One thing that really helped me was arranging a date for my mum to visit before I moved. It made it easier to leave knowing I was definitely going to see her again in 2 weeks. This might be a good idea?
Also, texting and phone calls are good for keeping in touch but it can be easy to become too reliant on them & not make the effort to mix with new people!

I've lived away before, but I'm moving in a different direction now and further away. My Mum has some lovely friends although a lot of them have families they help out with and other commitments, but they seem to rally round if needed. She's still in reasonable health and I'm encouraging her to get out more and meet new people. I keep telling her to make the most of her health and her ability to drive, to go out, join groups and make the most of it.

Yes, Mum will come and visit me. I generally call my Mum every day anyway, it's not often a big chat, often just a 'Are you ok?' 'Yes, are you ok?' sort of thing, but we know each other are safe and well.

I guess 'now' is sort of ok. I wish I had a bigger family, but I know I have to count my blessings, I'm luckier than many. I guess my concern is mainly for the future. If Mum gets ill, if I get ill, blah, blah, blah...my usual trick really of worrying about the future, but let's face it none of us knows what the future holds.

Gx

top_drawer_2

I guess my family is middling size but as they never make an effort (or reciprocate my efforts) it often feels very small. I envy those who have close loving families regardless of their size.

I have Mum and we have a very strained relationship which impacts on that with my 1st sister, (bil + 2 children) and a second sister and my Dad and his partner. Also a Step-dad whose family is huge but very disorganised.

I also have one remaining Grandma and an Auntie (+ 3 cousins and their children) who I rarely see. Its a bit like they live at the end of the earth but in fact they live maybe less than an hours drive away (10 mins from my parents).

TD

red_devil

yes we arent a very big family. We would have more on oh side but we dont speak for good reasons. So its just mine really, and we arent super close.

heartbreak_star

I actually seem to have lost my dad's family since he died.

We're cordial and love each other...but due to distance and general life we're estranged for all intents and purposes.

I'm an only child, and I think I've only got upset twice...once when I realised that really, once Mum goes, I don't have anyone left....and when I thought seriously about who I'd invite if I was lucky enough to marry OH.

HBS x