To Expat or Not?

mutley74

Almo wrote: »

What is the length of the posting and are there any completion bonuses? Is it likely that the contract would be renewed or extended? Whilst I don't think it's necessary that your son sits GCSEs (or A-levels) here, it would be better to move him back to the UK before he starts them or after he completes them, rather than in the middle of them. It wouldn't be the end of the world, but it's worth thinking about.

My parents took an expat posting for 3 years and ended up being there for 17. I had a great life growing up as an expat brat and was certainly exposed to a lot of things I might not have been otherwise.

That said, expat packages are not what they once were, and you need to be certain of the sums, particularly longer term when you come to move back etc (I presume they cover your flights home, what about shipping? Do you get a golden goodbye or anything?).

Generally speaking, I'd say do it.

Post is 2 years. They cover most school fees and provide accommodation allowance. After 2 years there is option of extension subject to work being available.
I have looked into schools and education systems all the schools in Singapore seem to concentrate on the International Baccalaureate programme. I spoke to his future potential senior school in UK and they said it is hard to judge if we moved back in 2 years if he could slot straight into GCSE work. It is a risk I am taking if we go.
I get about £2500 relocation allowance, and £250 demob allowance - not much to be honest, and I don't think I could get more. I am sure my total package is several times more than what local Asians earn in Singapore in my section. They will cover 1 flight home for both of us each year.

Anyone here had any experience of relocating a child abroad as a single parent? Do I really need my ex's permission?

tidesendtown

You need your ex's written permission. Failing that, a court order.

divadee

Singapore is a fantastic country to live. My parents lived there for 3 years and we visited every year.

They loved the country, and my mum said it was the only place she has ever felt truly safe.

The education system is outstanding, but be warned they work the kids hard to get amazing results.

I have a friend who moved out there 2 years ago with young kids and her lifestyle is one she could of only dreamed about. Most families (and not rich ones) have a live in maid (also called mummys helper) So this will take care of your childcare issues as they will look after your son and cook meals etc... It really isn't as expensive as you may think. My dads secretary had a maid! And I would say 95% of his staff did!( my dad was the boss).

I say go for it. You may live to regret it if you don't take this opportunity.

PoorCharleyBear

My husband lived there for many years as a child (parents worked there) and he loved it. We visit often and he still has friends there.
But he did have a weird American accent as most of the kids in his British school were American.

He says the downside is that it made his feet too itchy. We are now living in Australia as a result!

cinderfella

Just do it - you know it makes sense.
I am an expat & would not dream of returning to the UK.
Where I am the buses are brilliant & I would not take on a car even for free.
Every problem has a solution so stop putting obstacles in your own path & be positive:j

mutley74

cinderfella wrote: »

Just do it - you know it makes sense.
I am an expat & would not dream of returning to the UK.
Where I am the buses are brilliant & I would not take on a car even for free.
Every problem has a solution so stop putting obstacles in your own path & be positive:j

thank you everyone for words of support.
any more advice on how I can get my ex's permission to take my son out of UK without going to court? (not I have full residency rights in UK and she does not see him more than 1-2 per year and take no other part in his life)

plumpmouse

Hi

I'm an expat (not in Singapore although it somewhere I would like to move to at some point.)

I've researched schools all over the world as part of our moves. Would recommend looking at Tanglin Trust school (which from memory is British curriculum)or UWCSEA (which I think is IB). Both have great reputations.

I say if you and your son are keen go for it. Our move has changed our lives and our sons for the better.

Good luck

mutley74

plumpmouse wrote: »

Hi


I've researched schools all over the world as part of our moves. Would recommend looking at Tanglin Trust school (which from memory is British curriculum)or UWCSEA (which I think is IB). Both have great reputations.

I say if you and your son are keen go for it. Our move has changed our lives and our sons for the better.

Good luck

OI heard Tanglin has massive waiting list.
the 2 schools I am looking at are next to the City area and this close (walking distance) from the office, which I thought was better to stay near office/school/apartment.

plumpmouse

mutley74 wrote: »

OI heard Tanglin has massive waiting list.
the 2 schools I am looking at are next to the City area and this close (walking distance) from the office, which I thought was better to stay near office/school/apartment.

It probably does have big waiting lists I didn't think about that one. You may be lucky though. For some reason from my research it seems that younger age groups have bigger waiting lists than secondary. I'm sure whichever you get too will be great though. I think it is wise to try to be near the school if you can.

Its really exciting (and daunting) moving to a new country. We are doing our next move in a few weeks and can't wait.

Hope you both enjoy your holiday!

sparrer

mutley74 wrote: »

-parents are 70+ with health conditions

Just picking this one point -

Some years ago I met a wonderful man who lived/worked in the far east. Many times he asked me to go and live/work with him but I wouldn't because my then 80 year old mother had ongoing health issues.
Two years ago my dear friend passed away suddenly and unexpectedly. My mother celebrates her 92nd birthday next week.

I've had many chances to experience various adventures since and have taken every one. You have to think of yourself and your son, it's a super opportunity and will be a great experience for you both. I'm sure your parents would want you to take it for 2 years and there are so many ways to keep in touch these days - phone, Skype etc.

I'd get the consent issue sorted asap and accept the position, for both of you. Or as they say, Nike.
Good luck