Is it wrong to use Children's savings...

cte1111

My Aunt left my children some money, this is money that I would never touch. They also have child trust funds, which again is for their future. The inheritance is gradually being moved across to the CTF too.

They also have small savings accounts from money given to them for Christmas and birthdays (although they also sometimes spend this money at the time). My daughter has used the money in her savings account to pay for Brownies uniform, towards a Nintendo DS and most recently towards redecorating her room. I think this use of 'her' money is OK but others might disagree.

sabretoothtigger

Pay the debt but of course you owe the balance plus interest payable to them also. Or if you cant pay in cash, you owe them the house in lieu

So long as you do one or the other and in all outcomes favour them, I'd say you're an honest man. I'd sure like to repocess a house on those terms and at such a young age

SevenOfNine

atush wrote: »

And I suppose you would tell your daugther, who had been left by the father of her children to pay all the bills on her own.

Wrong, I wouldn't, depending on whether or not she was ordinarily a financially responsible parent.

I would also think, as her parent you might help her out short
term so she would not have to go down that route.

Same response as above, regarding ordinarily financially responsible - if so I'd lend her a hand rather than see her swipe the kids inheritance and savings.

Or at least lend her the 1000 quid needed to get a house sellers pack together to list the flat to be sold.

OP has stated that she doesn't really want to sell the flat as rental would bring a more regular income, which was why she borrowed money to decorate it in the first place.

People can get all high and mighty and moral here, and I do too sometimes (esp with dead beat dads)

I agree, you do get high and mighty and moral :A

but some practical advice might help over lashings of opprobrium.

OP asked for views on plundering, temporarily, her children's savings..........and that's whats she's got! I don't think she's asked for opinions on other options, but you should feel free to continue to give them.

atush

cte1111 wrote: »

My Aunt left my children some money, this is money that I would never touch. They also have child trust funds, which again is for their future. The inheritance is gradually being moved across to the CTF too.

They also have small savings accounts from money given to them for Christmas and birthdays (although they also sometimes spend this money at the time). My daughter has used the money in her savings account to pay for Brownies uniform, towards a Nintendo DS and most recently towards redecorating her room. I think this use of 'her' money is OK but others might disagree.

i suppose all that is great, but your family has not been left in financial meltdown due to the departure of one of the parents.

I myself (as I had not experienced a crisis of these proportions despite being forced to leave a country of employment) did not need these sort of extreme measures.

Until you have walked a mile in those shoes, perhaps refrain.

atush

OP has stated that she doesn't really want to sell the flat as rental would bring a more regular income, which was why she borrowed money to decorate it in the first place.

A decision she made before being abandoned

I would also think, as her parent you might help her out short
term so she would not have to go down that route.

Same response as above, regarding ordinarily financially responsible - if so I'd lend her a hand rather than see her swipe the kids inheritance and savings.

Thank goodness for your daughters if you have any. As I would hope anyone (and I would) would do. So, you aren't as heartless as you sound?

I agree, you do get high and mighty and moral

True, but oh so much less than you, and at least I know it.

OP asked for views on plundering, temporarily, her children's savings..........and that's whats she's got! I don't think she's asked for opinions on other options, but you should feel free to continue to give them.

Gotta love that morally loaded bomb of the whole plundering reference. Not your finest hour as a parent perhaps?

OP is desperately worried, and has been abandoned by one half of the parental unit. Of course they want opinions on other options- too bad you cannot be bothered or able to give them.


Let's hope others have some.

Edit to referance ANY for thanking that heartless, morally superior post.

Shame on you ANY

Any

Atush, if we all say we now see and completely and utterly agree with you and our opinions and views are invalid will you stop flogging the dead sheep?

OP asked our opinions, she got them, you don't agree, fair enough.
But please stop having a go at everyone who say no just to turn them to your way of thinking..

Any

atush wrote: »

Edit to referance ANY for thanking that heartless, morally superior post.

Shame on you ANY

OMG!!!:eek::eek:
You really don't see the irony of banging on about superiority and then say something like this, do you??

You see the post as morally superior, I didn't at all.
I see all your posts as morally superior, trying to guilt trip people into agreeing with you despite their believes and in some cases even legal practice.

I certainly don't feel any shame, but perhaps you should??

SevenOfNine

Atush, you can get counselling for the residual emotional difficulties you appear to have. It might help you move forward from them (& there isn't meant to be any hint of sarcasm).

Sadly it would appear you are transferring your own experiences, emotions and words onto the OP, who hasn't used terms such as "abandonment by one half of the parental unit", "financial meltdown", "desperately worried".

My interpretation of OP's posts are that there is couple separation - this does NOT necessarily translate into 'abandonment' (except by you perhaps), could be their own decision for all we know (not relevant anyway).

OP has listened to Martin Lewis regarding paying off debt, interest on the loan is much greater than incoming interest on the children's savings - therefore OP's dilema is should he/she take that and use it to pay off the loan (with the long term view of repaying it back to the children eventually), which would give approx £190 a month extra to live on.

OP hasn't claimed impending homelessness, being on the breadline, being desparately financially worried or anything of the kind. Perhaps I have underestimated their desperation.........or perhaps you have read FAR TOO MUCH into the initial question which was "Is it wrong to use the children's savings".

OP goes on to use the words "not my savings", "is it immoral", "feel terrible", "would value another opinion", & in a subsequent post "uncomfortable using their savings", "unlikely I will". If OP has been abandoned, imminent homelessness, financially unable to feed & clothe the kids properly, they wouldn't feel so guilty about contemplating the use of the children's money, would have no need of other views, & responses may well have been a unanimous 'yes, you simply must use it' anyway.

But OP has given the impression the coming times may be harder and the debt one less thing to worry about (with the £190 a bit extra to live on). They have clearly indicated they manage their money well, act in a financially reponsible manner, and account for every penny.

Therefore DON'T use the children's savings is equally valid advice as the opposite has been to those who gave it. Only the OP can truly choose what suits them best.

Your judgments of me have been hilariously WRONG, but frankly I don't feel the need to justify myself nor my opinions. Perhaps if you removed your judgemental hat you may be able to give more balanced advice to OP?

JohnRo

Condescending and self righteous... be careful that halo doesn't slip and choke you.

atush

I gotta say, my opinions remain the same. the Op should discuss with the parent who gave the money, then use it if agreed to pay off the debt, If this would leave them financially stable in the coming harder times ahead. Then, as I said before, pay back all funds incl 3% interest. Either monthly if budget allows, or from the sale of the flat.


they sounded desperate to me, and if they are I say good luck to them moving forwards out of this awful situation.

Those who feel morally superior, continue to shame them. Or perhaps give alternate advice.