what to do now

affordmylife

I hate my job in education and am currently on sick leave. I have been looking at alternative sources of income but have realised that I am going to have to take a pay cut.

Although I have small debt I am confident with careful planning (already in place) that I can manage this.

My problem is hubby is not so sure and really wants me to get a proper job.

What I have been looking at are things like holiday let cleaning jobs. school cleaning jobs. supermarket jobs etc.

I have lost my confidence in my ability due to various situations at my current work and have definitely lost all respect for the education industry and am quite sure I don't want to continue in that sector.

I feel like I want to take a step back from pressure and take something steady and perhaps a little dull just to get back on my feet. I want to take ownership of a job done well and be proud of myself again rather than feeling like a massive failure.

Really the money isn't that important. I have realised that how I feel is more important that another new top/pair of shoes/meal out x

Treevo

It depends what position you're in in life? Is it really fair for you to give up so easily and accept a job lower than your skillset allows without trying to find a middle ground? It seems unfair to expect your husband to take on additional financial stress because you've decided you want to work in a shop. But then I can also see your side that you want a stress-free job, but unfortunately if you have responsibilities, the stress won't disappear, it'll just be transferred to your husband to deal with.

affordmylife

thanks treevo. im only a teaching assistant so the money is not very much anyway. hubby does earn good money and we are comfortably off in many ways. its just I have small credit card debt of £1000. x

Treevo

affordmylife wrote: »

thanks treevo. im only a teaching assistant so the money is not very much anyway. hubby does earn good money and we are comfortably off in many ways. its just I have small credit card debt of £1000. x

In that case you're only issue is whether or not you will want to get a 'proper job' in the future and if taking a step back in your career will damage the chances of that?

You could always re-train while working in a shop? Find something you love while having a boring, easy, stress-free job?

affordmylife

no I don't think I will want to get a 'proper job' im 46 and was looking to retire 50/55 anyway. hubby will be retired by then too. so it isn't a big deal to worry about getting back into education or any other profession so to speak x

fluffymuffy

Some sort of self-employment might suit you.

Emm-in-a-pickle

Sticking with a job you hate is hard, but do-able. Teaching isn`t one of those jobs, IMHO! If you are feeling stressed, disillusioned, and that you`re a massive failure, it`s going to show...and make matters worse.
I admire folks who resign rather than plod on in situations like yours.
I have several friends who are and were teachers, and they`d say the same. One retired early, another resigned and worked very happily in a dress shop, and 2 who are still in schools wish they weren`t. One friend who still loves her job but moans about some colleagues who hate it (albeit sympathetically) and would be out like a shot if she felt that way.
For the sake of your integrity, as well as your health & sanity, nobody should blame you for wanting to leave, even if it made money tight. I wish you luck, and hope you find something you can honestly enjoy working at.

affordmylife

Emm-in-a-pickle wrote: »

Sticking with a job you hate is hard, but do-able. Teaching isn`t one of those jobs, IMHO! If you are feeling stressed, disillusioned, and that you`re a massive failure, it`s going to show...and make matters worse.
I admire folks who resign rather than plod on in situations like yours.
I have several friends who are and were teachers, and they`d say the same. One retired early, another resigned and worked very happily in a dress shop, and 2 who are still in schools wish they weren`t. One friend who still loves her job but moans about some colleagues who hate it (albeit sympathetically) and would be out like a shot if she felt that way.
For the sake of your integrity, as well as your health & sanity, nobody should blame you for wanting to leave, even if it made money tight. I wish you luck, and hope you find something you can honestly enjoy working at.

thank you so much for that. that is exactly how I feel. I want to stand by my convictions and get out with my integrity intact. I don't believe in exam factories. its not a good place to be. thank you again x

whitewing

Why does your hubby want you to get a proper job? Is it the money, or is it that he appreciates the skills and experience you have to offer, and he doesn't want you to set your sights too low for you? Or does he think that you will get employment more quickly if you go for a job nearer to your skills set, because you may not get the jobs you are looking for if employers judge - rightly or wrongly - that you will leave soon.

affordmylife

whitewing wrote: »

Why does your hubby want you to get a proper job? Is it the money, or is it that he appreciates the skills and experience you have to offer, and he doesn't want you to set your sights too low for you? Or does he think that you will get employment more quickly if you go for a job nearer to your skills set, because you may not get the jobs you are looking for if employers judge - rightly or wrongly - that you will leave soon.

I think hubby likes the £700 a month I bring in and admittedly anything else would bring in less possibly £500 instead. however as im paying approx. £500 on my cc a month it doesn't really matter.

I don't think he really has any understanding of my skills to be honest. and he has always said if he could afford to he would love me to stay at home. its just that I have up until now enjoyed shopping x

valk_scot

If the only reason you've been working up till now is to go shopping for things you don't need and the work has been stressing you out to the extent you've been comfort shopping to buy yourself treats to cheer yourself up well...you do need to do something to break the cycle, I'd say.

If what you're earning goes mostly to pay your CC bill and you're confident you can earn enough to continue while (and this is the important bit imho) feeling happy and content enough not to need to comfort shop then I think you'd benefit, OH would benefit if you were happier and the finances would remain much the same, yes?

And maybe a year or two down the line when the CC debt has been paid, you're feeling more stable within yourself and feel more up to it, you could perhaps look for more challenging job then?

Yes, I'd consider this to be a plan. But there are a lot of IF questions, most notably can you get a job that would cover the CC bill, would you stop comfort spending, would you feel better mentally in a new job?

I'd go over it again with OH though, you're not going to feel better for the change if he's not fully on board with it.