Do CSA take into account NRP outgoings per month.. bills/loans etc?

shegirl

FBaby wrote: »

Well if she was found out, and had to pay all tax credits back and then have it deducted from her entitlement, so she would would not be able to afford the house any longer, she would indeed be rehoused at some point, but the kids would be quite significantly affected. Not nice to put kids through this, but much worse then raising them with a false sense of what you get for doing little work....

The other aspect with reporting her is that it's possible she'll end up losing her job (employer may also be in trouble too) and there is the possibility of it being difficult for her to get another job..

I'd try talking her out of what she's doing first

lindsaygalaxy

I think you are making this too complicated. She wants to use the CSA. Fine, let her. You only have to pay to support one child - 15% of your salary minus the 1/7 for the night you have them (has to be overnight) It doesnt mean you cant treat them both equalley with cinema, clothes etc. If she threatens to stop access to the one youre not paying for then explain the impact on the child this will have.

moneysaymoneydo

One not biologically yours oh well halved your bill already?!

Grass her up and tell more people how wonderful you are to be paying all this time without question for a kid thats not even yours and reduce your bill significantly, simples!

Enjoy your new mortgage of course

Marisco

moneysaymoneydo wrote: »

One not biologically yours oh well halved your bill already?!

Grass her up and tell more people how wonderful you are to be paying all this time without question for a kid thats not even yours and reduce your bill significantly, simples!

Enjoy your new mortgage of course

Any need for the sarcasm? It's not the op that is being awkward, it's the PWC. The op was quite prepared to carry on as before, but the ex got greedy, not only is she working more hours than claimed and recieving CM from the op, she is also committing benefit fraud, and now wants more CM!

I sometimes wonder if some on here know what it's like to be emotionally blackmailed, what it's like to have a PWC use the kids as pawns to get more money or her own way? I went through it with my oh, and I can tell you it's ugly!! And the long term consequences can be devastating!

I have no time at all for NRP's who don't pay CM, or have no contact with their kids, however, to have a bitter PWC use the kids as some sort of emotional football, is IMO far worse! Parents (both of them) should be there to look after the kids, not stop contact on a whim because the NRP is not (in the PWC's view) coughing up enough money. Kids should never be used or dragged into a fight between the parents, ever!!

zUnknown

Marisco wrote: »

Any need for the sarcasm? It's not the op that is being awkward, it's the PWC. The op was quite prepared to carry on as before, but the ex got greedy, not only is she working more hours than claimed and recieving CM from the op, she is also committing benefit fraud, and now wants more CM!

I sometimes wonder if some on here know what it's like to be emotionally blackmailed, what it's like to have a PWC use the kids as pawns to get more money or her own way? I went through it with my oh, and I can tell you it's ugly!! And the long term consequences can be devastating!

I have no time at all for NRP's who don't pay CM, or have no contact with their kids, however, to have a bitter PWC use the kids as some sort of emotional football, is IMO far worse! Parents (both of them) should be there to look after the kids, not stop contact on a whim because the NRP is not (in the PWC's view) coughing up enough money. Kids should never be used or dragged into a fight between the parents, ever!!

Thanks for your comments. I tried to speak to her last night but she said its in the kids best interests 'and mine' that I pay through CSA. So thats fine and i'll do that.. I will also be reporting her.

As I said I usually have the kids stay 1 night at the weekend and have them a couple of times through the week but they dont stay over night... so I asked if I could have then stay one extra night and I would make arrangements to get them to school etc. But she refused.

I would still feel bad for only paying for one child.. do the CSA only calculate on the 1 child based on salary and thats it or can you say that you will pay a little extra than the calculation? Just feel the ammont for 2 will be very tight on my current outgoings. I spend anywhere between £30-60 a week when I have the kids on whatever we do but this will have to calm down slightly now. Boring dad. Its a total mess. Thanks guys.

kevin137

The payment through the CSA will be 15% not 20%, as it is not a simple 10% per child, i don't know how the 1st costs 15% but the 2nd costs 5%, but that is how it is.

So it will not reduce that much anyway... I would keep the difference and use that for the treats...!!! If you are paying for your child, then you have no legal obligation to pay any more than the CSA collect, and why should your ex have all the money and then be able to spoil them with YOUR money...???

I understand it is hard when a child is not biologically yours, but being a dad is way more than paying, and she should remember that by treating the child as yours still gives stability to that child, even if you are not paying...!!!

ANd if she kicks up about it, suggest she goes to the real father for CSA from him if she is so bothered, that way she would get another 15% unless of course he is a bum then she will get nothing and may see just how valuable you are in the childs life...!!!

Marisco

zUnknown wrote: »

I would still feel bad for only paying for one child.. do the CSA only calculate on the 1 child based on salary and thats it or can you say that you will pay a little extra than the calculation?

The CSA will base the CM on 15% (for one child) of your income, this can include CTC and WTC. So long as the 15% is paid, then it's up to you how much extra you choose to give, the CSA are not involved in the "extras", they are only concerned that you pay what they calculate is the correct amount for your income.

If you tell the CSA that only one child is biologically yours, and the ex disputes this, then you'll have to get a DNA test done. Hopefully your ex will agree that only one child is yours, to avoid all the arguments, hassle and bad feeling which kids always seem to pick up on.

NAR

OP she is "blackmailing" you so she can maintain her lifestyle, not the kids lifestyle.

Get thing sorted before you get drawn into it any further ie "My ex knew all along what was happening and was happy to be party to it." She and her employer are committing fraud through her claims, though what he is getting out of it is beyond me.

Sort out CSA for one child only. If you wish to give additional, separate cash amounts at any time as gifts then that is your choice.

Report your ex for tax credit fraud, why should all taxpayers support her lifestyle?

zUnknown

Marisco wrote: »

If you tell the CSA that only one child is biologically yours, and the ex disputes this, then you'll have to get a DNA test done. Hopefully your ex will agree that only one child is yours, to avoid all the arguments, hassle and bad feeling which kids always seem to pick up on.

She would not dispute this. We met when my daughter was young and she wouldn't try to say she was bioligcally mine to get more money. Well at least I dont think she could stoop that low but she has very much changed and suprises me every couple of months with more crap. She has said that if I only pay for one then she is going tell my older daughter that I'm not her real father which is worrying. Again... I hope she doesnt stoop that low.

Thanks

Marisco

zUnknown wrote: »

She would not dispute this. We met when my daughter was young and she wouldn't try to say she was bioligcally mine to get more money. Well at least I dont think she could stoop that low but she has very much changed and suprises me every couple of months with more crap. She has said that if I only pay for one then she is going tell my older daughter that I'm not her real father which is worrying. Again... I hope she doesnt stoop that low.

Thanks

That is shocking, but after our experiences with oh's ex, nothing surprises me any more Is she old enough for you to talk to her? Something along the lines of that although you are not her "real" dad (only maybe better words) that you love her very much and she'll always be your daughter.

If you get "in" first, apart from taking the wind from her sails, you can explain in a "nice" way what the situation is. As TBH it doesn't sound like she would do it in a sensitive way at all. When oh's ex ever mentioned the oh to the kids, it was always "your father" in a sneering way, when he used to phone to speak to them, she'd call them and then said "your father is on the phone" in that awful way. So try and get in first, before she has a chance to upset your daughter.