Does it make sense to get married?

reheat

I got married for love and we celebrated our 25th anniversary a few weeks back. My personal feeling is that if you are going to get married at all then that is the only reason it should be for, nothing to do with money. If you've both got a good relationship as it is then I'd be very wary of screwing it all up by marrying for the wrong reasons. But I recognise mine is a highly biased opinion.

ailuro2

If it is for love and practical reasons and not for the big party, then sneak off to the registrar's, or get married while you are on holiday.

We married in Vegas for $250- plus $15 for the licence-very MSE except for the cost of the rest of the holiday:p

We thought it wouldn't change anything, and tbh only did it to both have the same surname as our DD- we agreed a piece of paper doesn't make you love each other more, and we had already committed by having a child together/sharing a mortgage.

However,much to our surprise being married does feel 'different', it is hard to describe, but I/we feel more 'mainstream' and more secure should anything awful happen, which is strange as our relationship with each other has not changed at all- it is when dealing with others that we feel slightly 'changed'

Bean_Counter

To come at this from the tax angle, there are no income tax breaks from getting married. You used to get a married couples allowances, but that is long since gone.

The are some Capital Gains Tax and Inheritance Tax advantages in being able to make tax free transfers, but even being an accountant, I wouldn't recommend this as being a good reason for getting married!

liz105

A cheap wedding service down the registrars may cost less than getting a will drawn up, does anyone know how much a will service is these days?

findingmyownway

I think the whole 'next of kin' issue is the biggest for me

frivolous_fay

I think it's a bit harsh to criticise considering marriage from the tax / legal point of view.

'if you had any over whelming desire to be wed, you wouldnt be asking... you would just be doing'

Sure, I and my partner have the inclination to get married... but we wouldn't 'just do it' - sure, you can have weddings on the cheap, but I wouldn't get much satisfaction out of a wedding our families couldn't enjoy. My family is simply in no position to help finance such a thing, as we're not - so it's not going to happen any time soon.

But knowing there was a significant financial incentive might make it more of a priority, who knows?

Kimitatsu

I too had a long hard think about getting married again!Having been married once I was very reluctant, even though I adore my partner and am totally in love with him.

Unlike you I have two kids so it is slightly different for me, but unfortnatly that bit of paper does make a difference in the eyes of the law.

Inheritance tax is the first one, as a spouse you are automatically classed as next of kin even if the will goes missing (and they do!) and so have the benfit there, similarly next of kin in the event of an accident/serious illness/incapacity. There are naff all tax breaks, apart from gifts between husband and wife in the event of share transfers etc are free.

You both sound happy and committed to each other, so my suggestion would be have a quiet wedding, bury the piece of paper and act as if nothing is any different! After all its only there as a just in case

Curious_George_2

frivolous_fay wrote: »

I think it's a bit harsh to criticise considering marriage from the tax / legal point of view.

'if you had any over whelming desire to be wed, you wouldnt be asking... you would just be doing'

Sure, I and my partner have the inclination to get married... but we wouldn't 'just do it' - sure, you can have weddings on the cheap, but I wouldn't get much satisfaction out of a wedding our families couldn't enjoy. My family is simply in no position to help finance such a thing, as we're not - so it's not going to happen any time soon.

sorry, i dont see where in my post i suggest that they run off and do it on the cheap
me and my partner want to be married and have a big wedding and despite not having the money together yet we are still working towards it....
we are planning and picking things (but not buying yet)
we are going to get married, wether there is any monetary incentive or not....

what i clearly meant was that if they both really wanted to get married (for whatever reasons) the OP wouldnt be on here asking if there was any good reasosn for marrying and asking the opinions of complete strangers.... they would have been on here saying "oooh after 21 years together...we are finally going to get married"

Justie

Curious_George wrote: »

they would have been on here saying "oooh after 21 years together...we are finally going to get married"

everyone is different - when my OH proposed I'd been desperate to get married for about a year and he'd been dragging his heels, by the time we got married nearly 2 years later I couldn't have cared less. I was secure in our relationship by that point that a bit of paper made no difference to me and various other circumstances had changed (including my dad dying after many years of illness) that put a wedding into perspective. I don't regret getting married at all and I'm not sure that it made any difference to us as a couple but I do think it's much easier to deal with the practical things in life being married. Love and commitment come in many forms and marriage is only one of them. Being 'ready' to get married suggests that there is something lacking in the commitment by not being married - not everyone feels that way.

Unknown1234_2

There are lots of reasons to get married.

1. If you want to for Love, you can be in love without being married so thats up to you guys if you feel you want the titles and feel the way about marriage as others do (the most commitment).

2. If you did decide to have kids, things are alot easier if you have children to have married parents.

3. Yes it does help you financially, less tax, even sill ythings like some car insurance goes down if your married.

Its up to you : )