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Negative Folk

2

Comments

  • marisco_2
    marisco_2 Posts: 4,261 Forumite
    edited 22 April 2013 at 7:43PM
    Some people do seem to like wandering around under their own personal rain cloud. I tend to leave those type of folk to it and focus my time and energy on those who wish to engage with me.

    I believe in treating others as I would wish to be treated myself. I dont like to get into peoples faces or to feel like I am intruding but a quick 'hello, how are you' or a smile and small acknowledgement takes so little effort but can make a huge difference to someones day. What does it cost me, nothing more than a few seconds of my time. Some of my friends now came into my life by me gradually getting to know them from these small steps. So it can be very worthwhile to be polite and friendly to others.

    That said I am nobodys fool. One of my neighbours can be a tad miserable and cantankerous. He bit my head off once, when I dashed over to tell him that he had left his sunroof open, whilst it was hissing down. So when he'd left it open again whilst it was snowing I stayed put, drank my hot chocolate and watched his 4x4 fill up with the lovely white stuff ;)
    The best day of your life is the one on which you decide your life is your own, no apologies or excuses. No one to lean on, rely on or blame. The gift is yours - it is an amazing journey - and you alone are responsible for the quality of it. This is the day your life really begins.
  • Netwizard
    Netwizard Posts: 830 Forumite
    Whilst Im nowhere near as bad as this, im a grumpy sod! People call me victor. I have a few friends but not many but thats the way I prefer it. Less hassle :)

    I can quite happily go days without speaking or texting anyone. Obviously im pleasant to people at work but working In an office full of women, thats a task and a half too!!
  • Cooper18
    Cooper18 Posts: 286 Forumite
    Riversong wrote: »
    If you know what condition it might be it would be useful for me to read up on it so I can handle them in the future if it kicks off.

    Dementors is an awesome name I think I'll be adopting that :)

    Happy to have you share the joy of the Dementors name! Nothing fits some folk better!

    I'm no shrink but have heard reference to passive aggressive (negativistic) personality disorder and depressive personality disorder. But even if someone is genuinely ill, it doesn't take away from the fact that their behaviour can seriously impact the lives of those around them! So I try to avoid my Dementors where possible, thankfully I only see them once or twice a year.
  • trailingspouse
    trailingspouse Posts: 4,042 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts
    Netwizard - you do know that there are women on this forum too, don't you?
    No longer a spouse, or trailing, but MSE won't allow me to change my username...
  • meritaten
    meritaten Posts: 24,158 Forumite
    marisco wrote: »
    Some people do seem to like wandering around under their own personal rain cloud. I tend to leave those type of folk to it and focus my time and energy on those who wish to engage with me.

    I believe in treating others as I would wish to be treated myself. I dont like to get into peoples faces or to feel like I am intruding but a quick 'hello, how are you' or a smile and small acknowledgement takes so little effort but can make a huge difference to someones day. What does it cost me, nothing more than a few seconds of my time. Some of my friends now came into my life by me gradually getting to know them from these small steps. So it can be very worthwhile to be polite and friendly to others.

    That said I am nobodys fool. One of my neighbours can be a tad miserable and cantankerous. He bit my head off once, when I dashed over to tell him that he had left his sunroof open, whilst it was hissing down. So when he'd left it open again whilst it was snowing I stayed put, drank my hot chocolate and watched his 4x4 fill up with the lovely white stuff ;)

    how very satisfying! don't blame you one bit!
  • paulineb_2
    paulineb_2 Posts: 6,489 Forumite
    My ex boss was one of the most negative and toxic people I have ever met in my life, when she walked in a room the energy would flatten.

    The best thing she ever did was sack me. Took an instant dislike to me for no reason, same with another girl who was quite quiet, did no work while we burst ourselves trying to get her business into profit.

    If you made 6 sales in a day, got new gym members, shed be moaning about dust on a machine.

    And she and her husband are very well off, big house, cars one of which was paid in cash.

    But the most miserable toxic soul sapper Ive ever met in my life.

    I also have to say I live on my own and have done for a long time, I do have friends and I go out and the job I do means I engage with the public a lot and I like it.

    But I choose my friends very carefully these days having encountered numerous toxic people over the last 20 years or so.

    Lifes hard enough without people's melodramas over the square root of nothing.
  • Netwizard
    Netwizard Posts: 830 Forumite
    Netwizard - you do know that there are women on this forum too, don't you?

    Of course ;) im not saying all women are annoying, far from it, as I have more female friends than male, just so happens that most of the younger women in our office are full of "the mental"!!
  • bright_side
    bright_side Posts: 1,802 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts
    I moved into my house 5 months ago, it's a small close with only about 10 other houses, all pretty much on top of each other - apart from my neighbour, not one person has acknowledged me since I've been here :( I always smile when I see them, but they just look straight through me. It upset me to begin with, but am used to it now. I appreciate that people want to keep themselves to themselves (as do I), but a little nod or half a smile wouldn't hurt I'm sure!!
    Some people see the glass half full, others see the glass half empty - the enlightened are simply grateful to have a glass :)
  • aileth
    aileth Posts: 2,822 Forumite
    edited 23 April 2013 at 9:07AM
    We live near one of these, as per my football thread. We've only ever been polite and nice to her, but she seems to love trying to annoy us and cause confrontation at every turn, e.g. she'll wait till I get home to instruct her spawn to kick ball against house or into our garden.

    It used to wind me up, but now I think how pathetic she is, and is that really all she has to do in life. How very, very dull. Now the thuds of the ball is actually starting to make me crack a smile while I'm stood cooking dinner. She probably thinks I'm inside tearing my hair out when I'm actually sipping wine cooking lasagna!

    If the ball goes in the back garden, I won't answer the door and instead go to the french windows to watch her trying to navigate her way over our new pyracantha and trellis. She hasn't managed yet!
    I moved into my house 5 months ago, it's a small close with only about 10 other houses, all pretty much on top of each other - apart from my neighbour, not one person has acknowledged me since I've been here :( I always smile when I see them, but they just look straight through me. It upset me to begin with, but am used to it now. I appreciate that people want to keep themselves to themselves (as do I), but a little nod or half a smile wouldn't hurt I'm sure!!

    We also have this, apart from one woman across the road who did and is lovely.

    What really did wind me up is when me and OH spent a whole day clearing the entire hill to let everyone drive in and out. No one else bothered. People walked past us and didn't even comment, didn't even look at us.
  • Joons
    Joons Posts: 629 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 500 Posts
    Don't take it personal, they're just miserable gits and probably always will be. My mum was a very positive person even when she was very ill, my father was and still is a very negative person, it puts me off visiting him so much, I try but he eventually gets me down. You don't wanna be around folk like that, manners have gone out the window these days, nobody seems willing to just stop and say hello anymore.
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