Single - Life on hold whilst on DMP

hereigoagain22

Me too although I have 2 young children to keep me busy.

You can't stop living or put your life on hold.

As much as people say that it doesn't happen with "real" friends I find that naturally with all my friends the more I decline to do things with them because of money issues then gradually I start to drift apart from the group. They are still friends that I trust and would turn to for help or advice but I generally see much less of my friends now. Not having any money is my problem not theirs. My friends aren't going to stop meeting up for nights out or meeting with the kids at soft play weekly just because I can't afford it.

I think the key is finding a balance.

Legion90

Although I am not in the situation you are in I can imagine how difficult it can be seeing others you know go out and spend lots. Especially when you feel you are missing out on life. The choice you make to be debt free is the most difficult short term solution but it is the most responsible and easiest one to make when looking in the long term.

Yes you can make the choice to spend now and enjoy yourself but it will catch up and only slow progress to make yourself debt free. You are going through a life adjustment in order to find a new sustainable, happy in the long run lifestyle! One where you can be proud of once you eventually reach your goal. As others have said, look for the opportunities of free things to do and feel happy safe in the knowledge you are doing the right and responsible action!

Charlotte_Henry

Hiya, I have previously felt like this too. I embarked as a singleton on a 12 year dmp (aged 28). 2 years into it an old male friend contacted me via e-mail and asked if I'd be interested in meeting for a drink. I politely said no and explained that I was working 9-5 in the office and then weekends to supplement my income and didn't think it was fair to involve someone else in this. He e-mailed back saying if I changed my mind to let him know and I might even enjoy myself. With this we started chatting, met up and 2 years down the line he's living with me, paying me rent so I don;t have to work weekends so we have time together but I'm not out of pocket and we're talking about adding him to my mortgage to possibly pay the dmp off early.

My point is - you never know what's round the corner, think positively and anything's a possibility :-) Chin up and keep going, you're doing brilliantly :-)

Cocorico123

Have you had a look at the free cinema tickets thread on here too - you have to get in there quick to get the tickets, but I've seen some great (and some not so great!) films for free thanks to that thread over the past couple of years...

System

lantanna wrote: »

I'm sure I'm not the only one out there to feel like this but sometimes I feel like my life is on hold...I'm 33 and single - I spend too many weekends just sitting in front of the box because I can't afford to head out...

Does anyone else feel like this? I'm having a bit of a bad time at the minute feeling low and wondering if things are ever going to get better.

Hello,

Just wanted to stop by and say I'm in a similar situation to you. Although I'm not on a DMP, I am 33, single and in a lot of debt and trying to pay off as much as I can each month.

I often have really low moments when I see my friends (nearly all in couples, I might add) with enough spare cash to go on holidays, go skiing, go to gigs and events that I always have to say 'no' to because 'I can't afford it'. I say that so often that it's almost like my catchphrase now.

It is hateful, but then I think that I am doing it all alone and my friends are all in 2-income families, so of course I have to make sacrifices they don't.
You're not alone though, so chin up!

Red.