following on from the having children thread!

BritAbroad

I don't enjoy being around kids so avoid them as much as possible. I hate the noise, the clutter, the fact you can't put a cup on a table without a toddler trying to pull it off, or the fact the conversation invariably revolves around the child. I have a friend who won't socialise if it doesn't suit her son's bedtime, which isn't fair on everyone else. I have friends whose children I've never seen, which suits me fine. I have cousins where I couldn't even tell you the name, gender, age or number of kids, and I have no interest in being in their lives.

I'm lucky there are no children in my immediate family such as nieces or nephews. If that was to happen I'd accept that there would probably be times I'd see them, but I wouldn't go out of my way to be involved in their life. I'm not close to the adults, so I wouldn't expect to be close to the kids.

lika_86

I just find children dull whatever their age. I'm sure I will find the same if my sister ends up having kids but I'm sure I will tolerate them when I have to, I doubt I'll go out of my way to spend time with them.

Bluemeanie_2

I'm pregnant and I still don't like other people's kids! Mostly to do with how people let them play up constantly. And when did it become socially acceptable to let them stand on seats at restaurants?!

System

red_devil wrote: »

I was talking to someone the other day who said her friends son and his wife not only dont want children but they dont like being around them.

His sisters have children and they rarely join in when the family gets together. I found that hard to understand. I can understand not wanting children but i thought abit odd not to be around your siblings.

What happens when the children are not children anymore do they strike up a relationship then or not when they havent had much to do with them as children??????

Some people find it hard to relate to children. I wouldn't say I'm a natural with kids but I do love babies and I don't mind having children around. Unlike adults they live very much in the moment and they are so full of life.

If people are objecting to other people's badly behaved children I can see their point of view, definitely, but that is in many cases down to the parents.

valk_scot

I'm not that keen on being with other folk's kids either. I sit there wondering why their parents put up with their dreadful behaviour when I could bring them up SO much better and really, it's not good for me to be feeling that virtuous too often.

suki1001

I love my kids, but I dread it if I know I'm going to be around some other people's children, or dogs or even some adults.

My sister when she had her child, expected everyone to evolve around her son. They would come into the house, tell our kids to be quiet and turn the tv off, so their son could sleep in the afternoon.

codemonkey

I find its not the kids that are insufferable as some of the parents. Or what some people become when they have kids. I have some friends (thankfully not all) who are unable to talk about anything that isnt child related and more specifically their child related. Try to talk about anything else and you invariably get interrupted by a tale of what they found in little johnny's nappy or the "hilarious" thing little Jimmy said . This is boring and I think they need to understand that their child is only interesting to them.

I only really like children between 6 months when they start to be more than eating and pooing machines until they turn ugly around 7. Then they're pretty much insufferable until adulthood.

sweaty_betty

I admit to not being over-keen on other people's children, though I love my own and make an effort with the children of my friends because they often come as a "package". I find the more time I spend with specific children, the easier it is, although I know i'd never be cut out to be a children's entertainer/teacher etc :-)

To be honest, and potentially unpopular, I feel a bit hurt when friends have avoided me since I've had children. Many people I considered to be good friends I barely see once every 6 months now (& that's seeing them without children in tow). They also acknowledge that they can't even remember how old children are or know what they look like. I've always done my best not to "go on" about family (unless asked a specific question) so hope they don't see me as a "baby bore". I guess it's because my children are an integral part of my life and to be so uninterested in them maybe makes me feel as if they don't value me or my life choices? I don't really know, but I do miss them and the friendship we had for years.

Person_one

pigpen wrote: »

Other peoples children are unpleasant. I have 10 I love very much but go out of my way to avoid other peoples children. I hate the assumption that because I have children I must like all children.. I don't like all adults so why would I like all children?

Nobody likes all adults, but what you're saying is closer to "People in their forties are unpleasant" or "I don't like any over 70s." Its so sweeping.

I don't love all children, but just as with adults, most of them are perfectly pleasant nice people. In fact I find it much easier to forgive children for their unpleasant aspects!

Saturnalia

I love being with my nephews and the eldest (4 yr old) has friends who are lovely. But I struggle being around little children for a long time. They are noisy and very active. They aren't naughty, they are being normal little kids! And they have parents who discipline them if they do start being naughty and don't take them en masse to adult environments.

When they are all together I do need to take a break and go somewhere quiet every so often to relax, as it feels like I'll start screaming if I don't! Though loud & rowdy adults have exactly the same effect on me. It's like the noise and the activity level completely overstimulates me.