How to get rid of my 22 year old daughter!!

lizzie12_2

Hope you are able to get the help your daughter needs and things will start looking up for you all. Try setting her small tasks ( similar to kiddies ) eg, keeping room tidy, cleaning up after yourself, just start off small and try to keep her days buzy up to a point ( of what she may be able to tolerate at the moment.)
Would it be possible for her to do her own laundry? ironing? cooking a family meal? shopping?

Has she any friends who she could visit / or who visit her. Have they any suggestions?

Good Luck.

longforgotten

I'm with lizzie.

To be home all day and not help out in the home in any way is unacceptable. I understand though that she is depressed and therefore could find it difficult to interest in anything. But helping out would fill her day and make the family as a whole feel better. She would be easing things betweeen you and your wife and she would be contributing to the home, if not monetarily. It could be the start of lifting her mood and getting her a paid job.

I have a couson who's son is utterly useless, does not have depression or anything else medically wrong with him. Just a lazy, inconsiderate person who has taken to having everything handed to him on a plate like a duck to water. I hoped that as he got older that the thought to give something back would kick in but it hasn't. For him I do not know if his attitude will ever change.

Fizog

Can't be that depressed if she is managing to go out with Mummy chauffeuring! It sounds as if your wife is reluctant to let your daughter grow up, as your daughter is dependent and obviously has been for years.
Is this the case? Has your wife always done everything for her. If that is the situation it will take a lot of unravelling and will need your wife's cooperation...will she give it?
I agree with other postees - small steps every day to build confidence, get her involved with voluntary work if she can't find a permanent job, stop giving her money then she will need to find work and explain gently what life is really like. AN exasperated friend threw the local paper at her son and told him to look through the rent/accommodation pages to understand how much it actually costs to live in the real world.
Good luck I don't think you are alone out there - a rash of dependent offspring refusing to grow up and take responsibility!