Has Anyone Cured their Fear of flying?

Welshwoofs

With my fear of flying, it was 2 bad experiences in a row that did it for me. Up till my mid-20s I was absolutely fine with flying...didn't think twice about it and was happy to fly alone even.

But then I went on holiday to Egypt and the journey back was a nightmare. We were flying out of Luxor and it was a tin-shed of an airport with no facilities to speak of. Firstly we were delayed for around 4 hours due to the plane we were taking (Egypt Air) having mechanical problems so we were already hot, tired and bloody hungry (there was nothing to eat!). In the end they decided to refuel a plane that was coming in and turn it around. It's a 5-hour flight approx from Luxor to Heathrow and it wasn't too comfortable - no food on board as they'd only refueled and luke warm water or lemonade. About an hour out of Heathrow the plane suddenly dropped like a stone; things went flying everywhere, people standing up went over and pretty much everyone was screaming. The plane then levelled out - absolutely nothing was said by the pilot or staff and the rest of the flight went without a hitch....so I presume it was an air pocket.

Anyway, that left me shaken but not enough to put me off flying. A year later I was due to get the last plane out of Almeria on my own after a visit to my Father at his house there. Yet again a long delay (Monarch this time) and problems with the plane meant we couldn't leave. In the end a plane from another airline was brought on. From the moment I got on board I was absolutely crapping myself - it was some Eastern European airline where there's an engine in the tail bit. The plane literally smelt musty. When I sat down I saw the seat in front of me was missing a couple of the bolts that fix it to the floor! :eek: To make matters worse a storm had blown in and we took off in this junk heap with lashing rain and lightning flashing! Needless to say the flight back was turbulent and I wasn't the only one terrified - particularly as the staff spoke no English so couldn't assure me or anyone else. I was gripping my seat and sobbing the whole way and it didn't help that the woman next to me, in a misguided attempt to make me feel better, said something along the lines of "Don't worry dear, I've been in 4 emergency landings and I'm still here!"

So that was it. The next time I had to board a plane I didn't sleep or eat for a few days before. The morning of the flight I was throwing up until I was simply dry retching. I made it a few steps on to the plane and then totally freaked out and ran off. My partner caught up with me, tried to get me on (we were off to Spain) and failed so in the end we had to be escorted back through customs and when we got in the car I declared "We're going to drive to Spain." And so we did......and so I have ever since

colleensims

Love this thread.

I have a big fear of flying. Went on a plane for the first time when I was 17 (now 27) and have been on one almost every year since but I literally hate it! Even if I see a plane outside and I have my feet firmly on the ground I feel sorry and emotional for the people on board. I love our holiday when I get there but the plane journey ruins the excitement for me. I am flying to America again in June and although I should be excited, I feel like I am preparing to die.
We got a dog in November,he is like my baby, I feel that I am putting myself in danger by going on holiday and my husband and I might not come home and see him again.
When we go on a plane, I always tell my mum and friends what to do with my house, car and belongings if I die:eek: Its like I fully expect to die.
The worst things for me are.......
1)Waiting at the airport. I end up needing the toilet (I dont mean a wee) about 10 times before take off, It has a massive laxative effect on me!
2)My husband love to go to the airport and enjoy a massive breakfast and stuff before the flight. This annoys me as I am thinking 'whats the point of eating if we are going to die anyway'.....stupid I know!
3)As someone mentioned, with every sucessful trip (one where we havent crashed) I am always thinking the odds become more likely that you will have an accident.
4) I HATE HATE HATE takeoff. The noises, the angle of the plane. I usually put sunglasses on and cry. I get worse with everytrip.
5) I look around me and get everyone else doesnt look concerned. This annoys me even more as it makes me feel like a complete idiot.
6) I am constantly on the lookout for secret signals between the crew and pilots. If one goes into the flightdeck I start to worry that there is something wrong when in reality the pilots are just having a drink taken to them or somethings.
7) I hate a love/hate feeling for the pilot. I want to hug and kiss the pilot when we have landed safely, but if I spot the pilot going to toilet during the flight, I feel sick.
8) I cant believe they dont have parachutes onboard!!!!!! What good is a life jacket going to doing when you are thousands of feet in the air flying across America?

I shall stop writing now as the list goes on and on and on. I just want to enjoy my holiday!! Any pilots on here, with any facts that will make me feel better? thanks

vixarooni

I HAD a fear of flying. It stopped me going anywhere. I took valium, held peoples hand like i was hanging from a cliff edge and would make people sing to me. I jumped at every noise and stared solidly at the cabin crew to make sure it was all ok!!

Then i ended a 5 year relationship and had this sort of silly moment where i applied to be cabin crew. Then i got the job. Then i trained all the time thinking what the heck am i going to be like when i stepped foot on the aircraft whilst being assessed! But i was ok! I had wobbles at the beginning (and sometimes when i sat in the !!!! pit i was a bit ohh), but i was fine and i even ended up flying to America on my own

MY advice is, do the fear of flying course. I think understanding how the plane works helped me a lot, and meeting the guys who fly the plane helped too!

Good luck!

trolleyrun

Firstly, let me start by saying that statistically, 40% of passengers on an aircraft have some sort of issue with flying, ranging from a mild discomfort to complete panic. You're not alone

A few facts for you:

Pilots and cabin crew do not have more expensive life insurance. Flying is not a high risk activity.

Basic training to be a commercial pilot takes 18 months of intensive study. Then there's practicals and building up hours on a specific aircraft type. Pilots have to go through a rigorous medical check every year, and they get checked regularly in simulators and on flights. They get checked by Training Captains.

Every system on an aircraft is doubled as a minimum, but more usually everything is tripled. An example: The landing gear. There are 3 ways of extending it. Having done over 6000 flights in my time, I've only been on a flight that uses the first method of extending the gear.

Both pilots and cabin crew have a briefing before each flight. During the flight, pilots use checklists for everything. Not because they can't remember everything, but it's to eliminate the possibility of forgetting something.

Turbulence can be uncomfortable, but it isn't dangerous. You're adviced to wear your seatbelt to avoid getting injured in turbulence. When you next go on a flight, have a glass with a bit of water on the traytable. You'll most likely see how little the water moves.

Humans have an instinctive fear of falling (we can't help it). Therefore, you'll feel the descent more than ascent. An aircraft "dipping" during turbulence will go both up and down, but you'll most likely only feel the going down part. It's a bit like being in an elevator on the top floor of a building and going down in it. You'll feel that "icky" feeling in your tummy. It doesn't mean it's dangerous though.

During turbulence, when you feel that the aircraft is "falling", it is most likely only dipping by a few feet. An aircraft just doesn't fall thousands of feet, although it might feel like it does.

I'd recommend for anyone who has a fear of flying (or any other fear as well) to practice relaxation techniques and breathing exercises. It can help to alleviate any anxiety and it will slow your heart rate.

For those with control issues (as in having to trust strangers to fly you), think of it this way: you don't know how to fly an aircraft - the pilots do. Trust your crew, they all have friends and families to home to.

I'll come back with more info if anybody wants me to

Gloomendoom

Thanks for that.

I certainly don't have any big issues with flying. In fact, I'd say I am rather fatalistic. If it's my time to go, so be it. Never the less, I have at times found myself looking out of the window at a propeller and pondering on the chances of getting hit, should a blade come off.

Perversely, I rather like turbulence. One of the most memorable flights I have done was a night flight over Indonesia and Malaysia in bad weather. Being shaken all over the place while seeing distant mountains lit up by lightning bolts was like something out of a Tolkien fantasy.

tanith

I've read this thread through and most of the people who are afraid of flying have actually flown some many times so you have overcome your fear. How do you deal with someone who has never flown and knows that the fear will always prevent them from doing so. They will not even try because the fear of crashing is so great it is overwhelming and means they can't even try to overcome the fear because that means they may get in a plane that may crash. It sounds mad to me too but thats how my OH describes it to me. Its such a shame as he would love to do it but its a crippling fear and he just can't help himself.

loveabargain13

I don't know why but I work myself into such a frenzy that I normally end up making myself gag...
So silly I have been flying near enough every year since I was a baby I'm 29 at the moment.

I have been relaxed and calm before for flights but at the moment I'm anaemic and I find this plays havoc with irrational thoughts and anxiety not helping with nausea too.

I am flying this week and I agree with collie sims once I'm there it's great!

arroli

I dont actually have a fear of flying, Im ok once I am on the plane, its the actual boarding and disembarking that gets me in a panic!
i have a phobia about walking over glass bridges/walkways, have done for years, have gradually overcome it by hanging onto someone when walking, (last trip was a fellow passenger/stranger who was very understanding) but for days before my flight I start worrying about it..although I fly quite frequently I have now started to book flights from airports where I know they use covered walkways..which is sometimes inconvenient for flight times etc.
In Madrid airport I once asked for help from Iberia staff...they looked at me as if I was mad! and of course no help forthcoming - how I eventually got on that plane I will never know..(double length full glass)

anyone any ideas to help?

DKLS

I had a colleague like the OP, she was terrified of flying but was in the top 3 in the world in their speciality so had regular invites to speak at international symposia and attend meetings abroad.

Initially I would escort her on trips, which mainly involved getting her to consume as much red wine as humanly possible between checkin and boarding and I would 'guide' her on to the plane.

About two years later she became number 1 in the world in her field and had even more invites so she decided to conquer the fear as getting ratted wasn't dealing with the root cause, she had hypnotherapy and attended one of the courses run by BA.

It must have worked as when I met with her last she announced she had just got 2 first class flights for her and her hubby to New York after cashing in her Virgin miles.

FBaby

tanith wrote: »

I've read this thread through and most of the people who are afraid of flying have actually flown some many times so you have overcome your fear. How do you deal with someone who has never flown and knows that the fear will always prevent them from doing so. They will not even try because the fear of crashing is so great it is overwhelming and means they can't even try to overcome the fear because that means they may get in a plane that may crash. It sounds mad to me too but thats how my OH describes it to me. Its such a shame as he would love to do it but its a crippling fear and he just can't help himself.

I don't think this is accurate. I think most here have been at the stage of not avoiding flying because of the fear. As I said, I chose to go on a 12 hours journey on the train with two toddlers (and underground between two trains) rather than getting on a plane for a 1 1/2 journey. The only way I managed to get back on a plane was a mixture of tamazepam (valium) and just telling myself that I just had to do it. I can't stand the thought of anything irrational controlling me. However, I don't think any of the posters here have actually overcome their fear. I am due to fly in May and August and already I am dreading it. It gets a bit less traumatic each time, but I remains an extremely unpleasant experience. I would love to go the States to visit friends next year, but I don't know if I'll manage it.

In the end, whether you fly or not when you are overcome by fear is a choice. After all, if you don't mind the restriction, why would you make yourself do it? If however you face the situation of missing out on something you would really really not want to miss out on, you make yourself do it.