Please help! I need a confidence boost

ollow

Hi

I'm taking my children on holiday tomorrow and I'm really scared. I'm a single parent and it's all new to me.

Been away before but as a family but this time it's just me, DS8 and DD6.

I know I can do it but I'm really starting to work myself up. I'm not sleeping properly, my hand has started to get all itchy and swell (it does this when I get stressed)

I've never driven over the Severn bridge alone before, never used airport parking etc. I only passed my driving test just over a year ago. So it's all new.

I've been offered a lift but I turned it down because I have to do this for me and the children.

So any words of advice or encouragement you can give me will be gratefully received.

StressedOutMummy

You will be fine, you have done it before albeit without the children but it will be exactly the same. Don't stress yourself out, you CAN do it, think of the empowerment and self-achievment!
Best of luck

SOM

bella2121

You'll be fine just try and relax and enjoy it you'll have an amazing time I'm not a single parent but I did take my son to Majorca for a week when he was 4 on my own because OH was busy with work, it was great, everyone thought I was mad :rotfl: I told OH it was the best holiday I'd ever had.

Have a great time :j

Seanymph

Bless you - I remember very similar feelings when I became a single parent.

What will help you? Well, doing it - you'll find a new confident you and grow and become so independent that you won't recognise yourself.

The only way to get there though, is to do it, come home, and go 'blimey!'

I got through a lot of it asking myself 'what is the worse that can happen'.

usually it came down to money - I would miss my flight, or we would get lost or whatever. Then I'd work out what I'd do if that happened.

If I miss that flight we will - go somewhere else - catch the next one - go visit a relative for a week - go camping - stay at a b & b - go home and camp in the living room for a week together......

I found having a 'back up plan' helped me be calm because often I was panicking over something that really, even if it went wrong, wasnt' THAT awful. As long as the kids and I were healthy, and happy together experiencing things, then we were ok.

Anything above that was great.

So, you'll drive there - you'll be fine - work out where you are going - go onto google maps and drag the man onto the map and SEE where you need to be. Don't let anyone hurry you, drive slowly, and work it out as you go.

If you go wrong you can always drive around a go back and do it again (I have missed a car park before now at an airport - you just go to a roundabout and come back!). So, the worse that can happen is that it will take longer to park. So allow more time. Take a bag for the kids to have once they get into the car or onto the plane with new toys and a pad and pens - teach them noughts and crosses or boxes or other easy pen games, draw them things to colour in, stickers are always fun - to pass the time, pack snacks, then even if you are delayed they won't be hungry and thirsty (a six hour coach trip from a diverted airport with no facilities taught me that with two small children!).

Go, plan, work out the worse thing and realise that is ok anyway, and then enjoy. You will come back SO GOOD - and then you'll learn that you can do anything

I ended up taking mine camping for six weeks in Scotland one summer holiday, those memories hold us together now they are grown ups, we spent a lot of time together, and my girls have all the confidence because I gave it to them.

You'll be fine. And if you want help, ask people - I've never been turned down - from giving directions to offering advice other people are awesome if you ask.

Breathe in and out, take it one minute at a time, don't worry, and enjoy it.

aliasojo

I did this once (minus the flying) years ago when ex husband and I were getting to the end of our useful shelf life together, lol. I drove 300 miles to a caravan park with my two boys, never having done anything much by myself before. I got lost on the way, but I had a mouth which meant I could ask people for directions and it was all fine.

Your apprehension is just because this is a new task for you. I promise you it seems so much worse thinking about it rather than doing it.

Enjoy your break.

ollow

Thank you for the advice.

That's the silly thing I know I can do it, but I think I'm working myself up into a state.

I'm giving myself 2 hours to get to the airport even though it's only just over an hour away. I've got snacks and little puzzle books for the children. Money, passports, confirmation all sorted and in a folder, car has petrol etc.

I just need to do it now.

Triangle

Have a wonderful holiday

HalfPint

Hi,

I sympathise with you. It can be very daunting doing something you've never done before especially with 2 young children in tow. Just remember it's never as bad as you think it will be and you will feel so much more confident once it's done. 10 years ago, having never driven more than 50 miles, I drove 420 miles south to Bristol with 2 very young children (1 & 4) and managed it. I was terrified beforehand but I did it and long distance driving is no longer a problem for me.

Are you flying from Bristol Airport? I go there regularly to pick up relatives when they visit me and although it's a pain to get there, once there it's very simple to navigate your way round, parking is easy to find and I've always found staff very helpful.

Don't worry about the Severn bridge, it's only part of the motorway and you'll navigate this easily. Just take your time, and plan in advance. Occupied children are happy children and will make your journey less stressful.

If you need any help finding the airport and the best route there, I'm happy to help as it is a PITA to find .

HP x

Funky_Bold_Ribena

ollow wrote: »

Thank you for the advice.

That's the silly thing I know I can do it, but I think I'm working myself up into a state.

I'm giving myself 2 hours to get to the airport even though it's only just over an hour away. I've got snacks and little puzzle books for the children. Money, passports, confirmation all sorted and in a folder, car has petrol etc.

I just need to do it now.

Yes you do!

Just lean into it.

Nothing is better than achieving something you thought was impossible to do. You'll feel great once sat on the plane and all the worries about the journey will fade as you touch down somewhere warm!

My biggest bit of advice would be to learn your route to the airport parking so that you know whereabouts you need to be.

74jax

Aw you will have a lovely time, try to enjoy the build up to the holiday too!

I've been away with my DD many a time, however I just have 1, I'm sure you'll be fine with your 2 and they will treasure the time away.

Airport parking is really well signposted and i find if you don't know what to do or are stuck, people are really quite kind if you just explain. Once I was leaving the parking and couldn't get my exit ticket to work in the barrier, the guy behind was beeping etc, so I went and explained I was alone with my child and couldn't leave her in the car to go and sort it out at the desk (just 20m away) and the guy apologised and went for me.

When you get to the other side you'll find you just follow the crowd, your kids will be so excited and as long as you look as though you know what you're doing, they'll be quite happy.

I think you're right to do it yourself, or else next time you'll be in the same situation.

You've allowed plenty of time, have plenty of entertainment for the kids and deep down you know you can do it.

Think of the achievement sat on the plane jetting off to somewhere warm and all of us sat here dead envious!

suki1001

My oh never goes with me to when I go to visit me sister which is a 300mile trip each way, so I have to drive on my own with the kids. It's easier as I don't have someone nagging me about my driving.

I once drove over the Severn Bridge when I took the wrong turn. It's quite a nice bridge to drive over.

I always get quite nervous beforehand because of the anticipation of the journey, but once I'm on my way I'm fine. The anticipation is far worse and if you give yourself time like you're doing it means you can get there leisurely. It's nice with the children too.

Enjoy your holiday.