Nut query

mutley74

I am having massive fallouts with my mum as she wants to give my kid almond, cashew and pistachio nuts in his diet. He has a mild allergy to various products which cause him to have all over eczema. Hence, in the past he has never been allowed nuts. Although now he eats in moderation products which usually state on the packet “made in factory handling nuts” or “may contain traces of nuts” without too much problems.

Maybe silly question but are cashews, almonds and pistachios classed as nuts??

I personally prefer to not give them to my son at all at least until he is a few years older. He tried a pistachio last week (given by my mum against my will) and he got some of the skin from the shell caught on his throat and was sick all over. But my mum is still persistent. Don’t ask me why, except she has this belief thing that kids need butter, milk and nuts to grow.

Justie

if he has 'nut allergy' then that could be anything from just peanuts (which aren't technically a nut) to things like hazel nuts etc but it varies from person to person. Obviously if he gets anaphylactic shock from allergies then all caution should be used. If it's just a case of some foods make his eczema work then you could go about a bit of an at home allergy test of giving him one type of nut at a time and seeing what response he has from them. Him being sick cos he's got some stuck isn't a guide one way or another.

How old is he btw? Small children (toddlers) shouldn't eat nuts or things like grapes as they may be a choke hazzard.

If he can eat them without any ramifications then there's no harm although I do think it should be the parents' decision not anyone elses what children can and can't eat.

bap98189

Products which have “made in factory handling nuts” or “may contain traces of nuts” on the label almost certainly do not contain any nuts in the slightest. These warnings are printed on the side of just about every single packet of foodstuff nowadays, mostly as a legal disclaimer, and also because there are some people who are incredibly sensitive to peanuts that the merely walking into a room in which there are peanuts is enough to affect them. if your son has only as mild allergy then eating these products is unlikely to tell you whether he can tolerate them as they almost certainly contain absolutely no nuts at all.

Do you know which nuts he is allergic to? Most people are not allergic to all nuts, and besides the peanut for example, isn't even a nut, it's a bean. If you want to see if he can tolerate small quantities of nuts, and if his reaction isn't serious, then let him try a small piece of each one to find which he can actually eat.

On the other hand, he isn't going to suffer any ill effects if he grows up not eating nuts. He sounds very young, and perhaps waiting a few years before letting him try nuts would be a good idea. If you are really uncomfortable about it, then ask your mother not to give him any nuts. At the end of the day you are the parent, not her. There are very good reasons why kids should drink milk, but there is absolutely no reason why anyone has to eat nuts.

mutley74

Son almost 6. he does not have any serious allergy to nuts. But prefer he avoids nuts as still not sure what can flare up his skin. Dont know which nut he is allergic to.

So if a peanut if not a nut – what is a nut? (in terms of foods not politicians!)

kent_lady

He's your son so you can decide what his diet should be !! The advice about one at a time is very sensible but if you ultimately decide not to let him eat them at all that's your choice. They're a good source of certain nutrients but they can also be found in other foods so if he's not a faddy eater I would say (in the words of Mark Walliams' hotel character, Little Britain series 1) " ..no nuts...".

Stick to your guns!!

bunty109

Why do parents do this to us even when we have kids of our own?!

This is your decision and you have a valid reason not to give him nuts so I think your mum should respect that decision.

(((atpug)))

mutley74

bunty109 wrote: »

Why do parents do this to us even when we have kids of our own?!

This is your decision and you have a valid reason not to give him nuts so I think your mum should respect that decision.

(((atpug)))

Sounds like you have had similar experience to me.

Dunno but my mum thinks she can do whatever she wants with my son like her toy. Tells him stuff against my will at times. Dunno why she does it I have little relationship with her anymore, except that I need her help for my son (I’m a single dad) and son likes his GM. The other day I said to a family friend he don’t give him fish fingers, as I suspect sea food does cause him to be itchy.
So what does my mum say “no one fish finger is okay, its okay”. I mean does she not understand that i only make any rules for the best of him.
Arghhhhhhhhh.

I need that ((((()))) thanks bunty109!

Justie

atpug wrote: »

Son almost 6. he does not have any serious allergy to nuts. But prefer he avoids nuts as still not sure what can flare up his skin. Dont know which nut he is allergic to.

So if a peanut if not a nut – what is a nut? (in terms of foods not politicians!)

I think that eczema is linked more to dairy and things like that rather than nuts. If he's not got a nut allergy then there's no reason to worry about nuts more than anything else.

misswig

bunty109 wrote: »

Why do parents do this to us even when we have kids of our own?!

This is your decision and you have a valid reason not to give him nuts so I think your mum should respect that decision.

(((atpug)))

I completely agree!!! I had similar experiance with MIL(now ex) who kept insisting that breastfeeding my DS was not doing him any good She informed me when he was 5 weeks old that i should stop breastfeeding him now as he was getting far too attached too me!!! :eek:

However, she also used too tell me i needed to vacuum or clean the house when she came around so i suppose that is the kind of person she is

Stick to your guns, whether or not nuts (I think pistachios etc are classed as nuts) cause your son a problem or not, he is YOUR son, YOU are responsible for him and his upbringing however hard it is ( I speak as a full time working single mum of a toddler)

Good luck

Vxx

Curious_George_2

i had to tell my mum off for doing things behind my back with my daughter a few times, to the point that i almost told her my golden rule of parenting is to think "what did my mother do" and then do the complete opposite.

she was giving my 6 year old girl a dummy at night.... a DUMMY!
we gave those up to the dummy fairy at about 2 1/2 maybe 3 years old and she never asked for one since but my mum says that its ok because "she likes it"
she might also liked being rolled up in a carpet and thrown off a bridge but that aint happening either!
i couldnt believe the woman! she gives her masses of chocolate when i ask her not too (not often, but when there is a reason for it)
i had reason to believe that she was allergic to a certain type of bathroom product and mum continued to use it on her and then practically accused me of neglect because my girl was itching all over "well... you must be using cheap washing powder"
infact my DD is going for an operation in 2 days time.... my mum would probably argue that a little bit of breakfast in the morning wont hurt when she has to be nil by mouth from midnight onwards.

i had to tell her straight, like it or not, these are MY children and i know what is best... so cut it out!

ps... she also told me im not allowed to put my arms in the air when im pregnant or i would choke the baby with the umbilical cord ::
i dread to think what she smelled like at the end of her three pregnancys! lol

MKwife

At the end of the day he is your son and if you do not want him eating nuts your mum should respect your decision. She has had her way of bringing up her children and you have your way now.

If this was my mum, I would just take her aside and ask her to please respect my decision.

Could you not get him tested? They can do a patch type test on skin to test allergys?